To ask if I did wrong re: neighbours

[Iwishihadnoneighbours]

I phoned up neighbour telling her her child has knocked on my door 4 times this morning after I have told them DS is busy today. I explained it’s not just her child it’s a group of them but as I know her I’m phoning her to ask for support in not disturbing DS as he has an important exam coming up.

DS is 10 and the children all range from 3-11 I think. She was okay and I did apologise profusely saying I know they are kids and it’s only 3 hours in the day I’m asking for not to be disturbed. She seemed really cold on the phone and interrogated me what schools I’m applying for etc. I don’t feel comfortable telling her this for various reasons. One being there’s a possibility of us moving out of the area so we applying for lots of different ones. The reason we might be moving is not one I want to discuss with someone I barely know, this is anonymous so I don’t mind writing - possible divorce. I’m under a lot of stress as you can I shine, the uncertainty of where I’ll be a year from now, the stress if getting my child through the 11+ and the stress of constantly having people kids disturbing me whilst I’m trying to relax or cook or help DS.

can someone please guide me and help me with my emotions right now. I can’t speak to anyone in RL.

I think you’re completely reasonable OP, sounds like you’re feeling vulnerable as other stuffs going on right now, I’m sorry you’re thinking about divorce. I’m in a similar position and it puts you in the mindset of overthinking everything! Try not to give it a second thought and give her a cheery wave when you next see her!

Not unreasonable at all! She’s just being a nosy bitch with rude children who should have been told that they don’t go repeatadily disturbing the neighbours after they’ve been told not to! Other than apologising to you and saying that she’ll have a word with her child and stop them knocking she shouldn’t have said anything else and you certainly don’t need to tell her anything personal!

Thank you both. I actually wrote a message to her but didn’t send! I apologised for being short when she asked me the schools. The thing is she’s asked before and I’ve changed the subject but she doesn’t get the hint! She even asked my DS herself

Didn't you post about this last week too?

Are you answering the door each time? If you just ignore them maybe they'll give up

You’ve posted about this before OP.

I must have posted under a different username! I’m just so stressed I needed support sorry. I worry about being identifiable do changed my user name x

You need to stop discussing your business with the neighbours - she doesn't need to know your dd has exams coming up or that you are applying for schools. You can just say her kid has knocked 3 times and you've already told him DS isn't free today so can she have a word and put a stop to it? That's as much info as she needs!

@HopingForTheBest25 you are right! I really wish I could think clearly I really didn’t have to tell her. Why did I bloody tell her I’m so stupid

You're going through three extremely stressful things at the moment: divorce, 11+, house move.

You need to give yourself a talking to about your priorities. Being nice to your nosy neighbour isn't one of them.

Right now you need to shrink your world to what's going on inside your house. You don't owe your neighbour any explanations or guilt. Just keep your focus, and let her be cold if she needs to be.

@HiRen thank you x