Should they replace

[Pushmepullu]

We lent a friend a large gazebo over the weekend for a family party. We have had it for a few years but is as good as new. Despite us saying we would come round to take it down once it had dried, they returned it to us yesterday. It’s been raining here since Saturday. Today as it’s sunny we have taken it out and on opening it up can see it’s been damaged. Would I be unreasonable to ask them to buy us a replacement? DH thinks that as we bought it a few years ago in a sale that the replacement would cost them more than we paid. But if they only give us the price of what we paid then we will have to make up the shortfall.

No they damaged it they replace it,

Your first step is to ask them about the damage

Have you told them it appears damaged? Can it still be used? Or repaired?

Did they ask to borrow it or did you offer? How was it damaged and is it still functional?

If you offered and it was damaged accidentally, it wouldn't sit right with me to have them pay for a brand new one as they'd have been better off buying one in the first place. Now they are out the money and the gazebo, and you have replaced your old, used (despite being in good condition) one with new.

Having been burnt in the past, I personally only lend things if I'm willing to take the risk that it won't come back at all or in one piece. (I often am willing.) Similar to only lending money if you can accept that you might not be paid back. "Neither a borrower nor lender be."

We haven’t told them it’s damaged yet. It can’t be repaired, it’s a tear in one of the sides and a pole has been damaged. They asked to borrow it.
The husband can sometimes be a bit gung ho, hence the reason we said we would go round to take it down. He camps, so he knows it would need to be dry before putting away.
They are good friends of ours and to have said no would have caused ill feeling. But I take your point CatsorDogsrule.

I would start by asking the wife if she knew it had got damaged as I was surprised they hadn’t mentioned it, and asking what happened to it. (It could be that she doesn’t know her gung-ho husband damaged it.) If it’s now unusable, say so in a non-confrontational way. They might then, after discussing it between themselves, offer to replace it without you having to ask for it.

If they don’t, it gets awkward. They ought to replace it really, but that would mean you were getting a brand new one so you could compromise a bit.

I’d be more annoyed they hadn’t mentioned the damage. They must have known. Did they think you wouldn’t notice?

Maybe with it being old and then moving it it fell to bits anyway.

Whatever you do, one party is likely to feel aggrieved. Would a consideration be that they buy the old one from you, for a reasonable price?

I do understand that you want to be made whole.

Ill feeling if you didn't lend it to them; are they truly good friends?

Thank you all. I will have a word with them and see what they come up with. Just disappointed that they didn’t tell us.

What sort of money are we talking about? Can it come from their house insurance?