Joint birthday parties

[Howtotrainarabbit]

If you're invited to a joint birthday party for two children but the whole class is invited, is it usual to buy a gift for both children even if you / your child only knows one of them? For us our DC is clearly invited by one of the children and the invitation only refers to that child but there may be children who know both.

I'm guessing everyone buys a gift for both children? I'd usually spend up to £15 on a school party gift but I'd be looking to spend £20 for both if it's a joint party. Is this acceptable?

I’d only buy for the person you know

I've just remembered we have been to a joint party before but it wasn't a school party so we didn't know the other child or their parents at all and the invitation only mentioned the child we know. It feels different when it's a class party but I don't know what the rules are!

If a joint class party then present each regardless of how good mates your dc is with either child

if you don’t know the other kid no present

How old are the children? Both in the same year/ class or siblings?

Just seen it’s a class party, assuming the birthday children are in the same class or year, yes you definitely have to buy a gift for both.
Depending on age, I’d suggest maybe getting a colouring book and pencils / pens, maybe stickers too for the child you don’t know well. Or perhaps a sticker book. Easy to do for under £5. It’s okay to spend more on the child you know better/ DC is better friends with.
Or can look in the Argos 2 for £15, or 2 for £20 if you want to get them similar value gifts.

Yes it's two children in the same class so it seems appropriate to get them both a gift but one is a friend's child so I will probably spend more on them.

2 for £15 or 2 for £20 could also work

I'd give both a present definitely. They won't be comparing afterwards what gifts they got from who, so it doesn't matter if you spend more on the one you know better.

I would only buy a present for the DC that invited your DC and possibly a card and packet of sweets for the other DC.

If it’s a joint party for two children in the same class (and DS is in the class), I buy them both presents even if DS is more friendly with one than the other. At our school, whole class passes are generally Year 2 and below and friendships are so fluid at that age

When we (co)hosted a joint party, we put a suggestion for who to buy a present for on each invitation, so half the invitations suggested one child, the other half the other. Might not help you this time, but it worked well for us, and one day you may be hosting

I’d get a gift or £10 in a card for the friend you know and like and a small token gift for the other person.
It can get out of hand spending lots on each party invite.

They’re obviously young kids having a joint party so just stick a fiver in each card and sellotape it to a bag of skittles or whatever

If the invitation only mentions one of the two birthday children, it’s probably done deliberately to avoid you feeling you have to buy for both… But I’d get a token gift for the other child anyway, if they’re not a total stranger.

It's a 5th birthday party so I'd usually buy them a gift rather than give money and sweets but I just limit to an overall spend of £15-20 if I can or buy the one we don't know as well a book for under £10.

I wouldn't but a gift for the one I didnt know.

If i knew both id take 2 gifts

Whole class party for two 5 year olds in the same class as each other and your DC? Definitely 2 presents I’d say, it would look a bit stingy to only buy for the child your DC is more friendly with. It doesn’t need to be expensive at that age at all.

That's what I think too

I used to do joint parties for my 2 kids (couple of years and a couple of days between them).
I definitely didn't expect presents for both - and invites were from just one child. So some families got one invite from DS1 and one invite from DS2, if they had kids in the same classes as my 2.

Do that then 😅 it’s really not hard. They are 5, get each kid a small token present or money and sweets. Doesn’t matter which really

I was asking Mumsnet in case there is a general rule I'm not aware of but thanks for your time 😂

If it's a joint party for the whole class, then we normally do one present each, the kid that my DC don't know quite well gets something general like sweets, arts&crafts supplies, etc. We usually make birthday slideshows for both kids and ask for the permission to play it during the party, so none of the birthday children feels left out.

How was the intivation (if there was one), did it mention both names or just one? Sometimes parents organize joint parties for their kids and invite their respective friends and the invatations state who exactly intived you, so you're bringing a gift just for them.

It just says the name of the child we know but the child's mum has mentioned in passing that it's a joint party with another child in the class.

We did a joint 4th birthday for DD1. Friends who knew both (NCT) bought for both, nursery friends only bought for the child they knew. We invited even numbers for each so it didnt mean one of the birthday girls had more gifts than others. Worked out great!

Edit to add the girls are at different nurseries though so maybe easier than if its two girls in the same class? In that case, id buy for both.

Yes it's two kids in the same class so I think buying for both is the right thing.