Me, Myself and I

[niadainud]

For the love of Lindley Murray, please can people stop using "myself" and "I" when they actually mean "me"?

"Myself and DP..." is never correct (at least I can't think of an example when it would be correct to begin a sentence in this way) and just sounds pretentious. "Myself" is a reflexive pronoun, or used for emphasis: "I hurt myself" or "I wouldn't do it like that myself".

"I" is for when you are the subject of the sentence (i.e. you are the one doing it): for example, "DP and I like to go dogging at the weekend."

"He came dogging with my DP and I" is wrong as "I" is being erroneously used as an object pronoun in that example.

In short, "me" is not a dirty word, even if "dogging" is.

Sorry, I know some people hate grammar threads that stray outside Pedants' Corner and I fully expect to be jumped on for any minor solecism I may have inadvertently committed, but I'm running out of patience with this one.

Oh, and while I'm at it, you're most probably "lying", not "laying", unless you are some sort of bird.

I have heard it said aloud, but that certainly doesn't make it correct!

I do think English is very clumsy when it comes to such constructions.

I thought there was no lying any more? These days it's all "gaslighting", whether the person using the term understands it or not.

Lying as in lying down, not fibbing.

The worst is when you say it correctly “When you are finished with that, please pass it along to me and Rob” and someone corrects you: “Actually, it should be “… pass it along to Rob and I””. Argh!!! No, no it shouldn’t.

He came dogging with DP and I

😂 😂 😂

But yes, agree with your overall point.

Should it be Rob and me though?

As opposed to me and Rob?

It should be "Rob and me" by convention, but in that sentence "me and Rob" is still gramatically OK and better than "Rob and I".

This is a stupid question, and not to derail, but should it actually be:
Please see Brenda and my paper
Or
Please see Brenda's and my paper
?
Neither sound good. I'd probably reword it to something like "Please see the paper by Brenda and me (myself? 😉)". But one of the above must also be correct, I think.
I'm never quite sure, even though I am generally pretty good with grammar!

Or "mine and Brenda's paper". That sounds better, I think. But "Brenda's and mine paper" doesn't work at all.

Oh man, I've forgotten how to speak!

"Myself" particularly during episodes of The Apprentice. Arrrrrrgh!

Brenda's and my paper is fine. Whose paper is that? Brenda's and mine.

The people who need to see that they are using the terms incorrectly are unlikely to look there. It is better here so that it gets traffic and hopefully those who use the terms incorrectly can learn not to.

I thought this was a thread about Joan Armatrading. I’m probably showing my age.

Thank you!

Agree I hate the use of myself and yourself now

I don't think the Hiberno-English usage conveys the same degree of pomposity as what I'm describing.

It doesn't. It's actually a more familiar and casual usage than I/me.

One of my favourite uses: "Is it yourself that's in it." Used to express to mild surprise at meeting someone unexpectedly.

I've done the same thing (speaking to someone in a call centre) but I don't think they realised I was taking the mick. It ended up getting really tied in knots of 'yourself' and 'myself' but they probably just thought I was really posh!

My god I agree with you. It's unbearable.

Also ' yourself'. " I'd like to speak with yourself about dogging"

Or, worse, gaslit! As in, I was gaslit. Nope. That's something to do with gas lamps.

As in "sit yourself down" ... very common in Scotland / Ireland but virtually never heard in England.

I'm listening to Lord Leggatt speaking in the Supreme Court; he's just said, "...the judgement was given by myself."

It's everywhere!

Brenda's and my paper. Definitely not mine and Brenda's paper! You wouldn't say mine paper, would you?

Similar to PP, my first thought was musical - De La Soul 🎶

Isn’t it? I’m pretty sure that’s commonly used in England. I’d say it! It’s being broadly used appropriately too.

Removing the other half of a couple is exactly how I was taught to work out whether to use me or I, although I think sometimes now people use me when I would be correct, so not necessarily foolproof! And that it was more ‘polite’ to put the other party first. All from my mum who was an old-school English teacher.

Brenda’s and my are the same thing - possessives. You just don’t need an apostrophe for my as it does the job in a single word.

That is true. Thanks!