DP and dynamic around my DC

[VioletMusic]

My DP doesn’t have children of his own, but gets along well with my two (17 and 19 respectively).

The issue is, he often puts his foot in it with comments and then blames the fact he has never had DC himself so isn’t used to what can and can’t be said.

It isn’t anything extreme as such, the latest example is my DS1 having friends over yesterday (all 16/17) and DP asked one his age, acted surprised and said he must have done a paper round in a warzone.

My eldest has a holiday abroad coming up, when DP was told about it he said something about stocking up on condoms and to get a league table put up in their accommodation. They aren’t going to a party resort and aren’t that type of group.

He is great aside from this but it’s starting to cause me some embarrassment.

He’s showing you who he really is…… be warned!
This would be a deal breaker for me

He sounds like my Dad and I love him…😆

Sounds a bit of a laddish tit, tbh. It's not a question of what's appropriate round teenagers, it's what's appropriate full stop. What kind of job does he have, sounds like a workplace with busty nude calendars on the wall..........🤣

As you say, he's not a parent and he's trying to banter with your DS but getting it really wrong, he's talking to them like they were adult mates. Talk to him Op,tell him to rein it in, they don't want to hear that sort of thing from their Mum's boyfriend

He sounds like a wanker, OP.

I don'tsee how not having children of his own excuses talking like that to your Dc and their friends.
It's not hard to imagine what the conversation must be like when he is with his own friends.

His comments about the condoms are gross. Would massively give me the ick

Yep.

need to grow some decorum

He sounds like Simon’s dad off Inbetweeners

Just sounds like banter to me. Can't see what he has done wrong at all.

Sounds like he is making OP and her kids and their mates toes curl with the cringe of his banter !

Ah, banter. The go to excuse for arseholes.

Sounds a bit immature but harmless.

You don’t need to have had kids to know what is and is not appropriate to say to someone op
in any event, your kids are adults really

i would bet a lot that your kids aren’t fond of him and take the piss out of him out of your ear shot

Ewww. He's gross.

I guess he is trying to be friends via banter but obviously it’s not working because he is an old(er) man. He should stop and just be normal.

both of those jokes are extremely over familiar with people he doesn’t know or his GFs son who he isn’t friends with either. It’s just too much and comes across grim

Banter doesn’t work with strangers. It’s just weird and gross

To me, those things aren't appropriate to say whether they're to friends, family, acquaintances or colleagues. So I wouldn't be happy. If he says things like this to his mates and you are ok with that then maybe you just need to go through what is and isn't appropriate to say to your children