Chertsey to live in?

[koolkatxx]

Hi all,

We’re a visibly Muslim couple (I wear the hijab), currently exploring areas to potentially move to.

We found a lovely property to rent in Chertsey which was also very affordable so we went for a viewing and afterwards walked around Chertsey and, to be honest, we felt very stared at, not in a violent way, but enough to make us uncomfortable. It left us wondering whether we’d feel welcome living there long-term.

We’re now considering whether we should move here and how inclusive are they in practice? Would a couple or a family like ours feel like part of the community, or like outsiders?

We’re not expecting perfection just basic decency and comfort being ourselves without drawing constant attention.

Any honest feedback (good or bad) would be really appreciated. Thank you!

@koolkatxx

sorry you had such a bad experience
but because of people like Nigel Farage and Brexit this is happening more and more.

brexit pulled us out of the Dublin convention which meant boat people could be sent back to the first country they entered in to in the EU.

the boat crisis is causing increased anger and resentment

it’s all Nigel Farages fault.

Do you like local to Chertsey now? I am not white and find Chertsey ok (live in a nearby town) but I wouldn’t say it is diverse. If I felt uncomfortable I wouldn’t move there.

I'm not sure that answered her question...

Go with your gut I’d say. I don’t know chertsey that well but I’d suggest Woking as it’s generally more diverse and has some nice, affordable areas

Chertsey is a pretty white affluent town, like most of Surrey. I don’t know why people would stare though as they are near to London which is very multicultural. I am in Surrey, but just a mile or so over the South London border and our town is also largely white, but by no means exclusively. My own DC are mixed race (white / asian) and they don’t feel out of place or stared at. Their school is in South London and is very multicultural.

Sorry you felt like that. What about nearby Staines? More diverse and much improved over the years with better transport and facilities than Chertsey. I live there and there are plenty of hijabis. A halal supermarket and several halal restaurants.

Yes I live just 15 min drive away!

I would suggest more Woking /staines than Chertsey. Woking has a thriving Muslim community (but the prices do indicate that and the proximity to london).

Chertsey to me isn't better or worse than other towns nearby (but if you live 15 mins away then you probably know this?). Which part of Chertsey may also make a difference.

Oh god not Chertsey. Chertsey is a shite hole. I live in a nearby town. If you can stretch to Walton, Weybridge, Addlestone or West Byfleet I think you'll feel more comfortable. Although predominantly white areas, I know there is visible Muslim community within and many Asians. Woking is an interesting area and definitely on the up. Due to the fast trains into London prices have sky rocketed in certain areas.

Unfortunately racism and othering is on the up in all areas due to the current political climate. It's never acceptable or comfortable. I say this as a non white minority poc.

Oh and don't do Staines if you have kids, it's rough as fuck

@GivingUpFinally Neither Chertsey or Staines are rough as fuck or shiteholes. Just ordinary busy Surrey towns. As you’ve suggested Addlestone as a less ‘rough’ town I am confident you don’t know these areas and are going off some decades old prejudice.

No, I'm quite sure. I've lived in the area for over 25 years. And have lived in a couple of those I've mentioned, in different types of house. I am in a town about 10mins away from Chertsey. Like anything it's just opinion and I'm sorry if I've caused you any offense. The most inclusive town would be Woking but it's such a mixed bag.

I live in Staines currently

I've lived there as well. It's the place I've experienced the most racist behaviour. I did however live there over 20 years ago for less than 2 years. The town centre has died a death from then as well. When I was there it was all about the Staines Massive and that moron in a mankini. It's hugely effected my opinion. Laleham is pretty though, just difficult due to location.

Could you stretch to Lower Sunbury? It's expensive but has some decent schools and ok ish transport links.

Well, I live in Walton on Thames and would be thrilled to have to you here! Feel free to PM me if you ever want to chat.

It's not because of NF and Reform. It's because it's deeply unsettling to see such extreme misogyny and oppression in action.

Thank you x

I actually think it’s oppressive for you to tell me that I can’t cover because it makes YOU uncomfortable. What happened to freedom to wear what I want? My sisters in law do not wear hijab, my big sister doesn’t, half of my Muslim friends don’t. I choose to because I want to. You telling me that I shouldn’t IS OPPRESSIVE. But I’m not going to be debating with you further as you are clearly ignorant and hateful and I have too much going on in my life to deal with the likes of you.

Woking has a significant Muslim population especially the Maybury and Sheerwater areas so no one would bat an eyelid at a woman in hijab or any other person in ethnic/religious clothing although they aren't the nicest areas of woking but not absolutely awful (I use to live in sheerwater, the school there had a very high % of muslim children).

Could try West Byfleet, Byfleet and New Haw. West Byfleet is the 'nicest'.

I like Chertsey but it isn't that ethnically diverse so if you are feeling uncomfortable, i'd go with your gut.

Addlestone is rougher than Chertsey.

Weybridge is expensive and very affluent.

Shutting me down though as hateful and ignorant is you creating division. Not me. I'm truly not hateful and would never be rude to your face or unwelcoming or think negative thoughts about you. It's men who have created this culture in which you believe that you must cover up. Your views don't exist in a vacuum. It's a false view of freedom.

How do you not have negative thoughts about me when you literally said that what I wear is misogynistic and oppressive? Men have nothing to do with what I wear. The Quran dictates how we should dress… not men. Men also have rules they need to follow eg covering from naval to knee, no shaving of the beard, lowering the gaze etc.
There is wisdom behind the rules we follow but clearly you have not looked beyond what the media says or asked a Muslim or done any research yourself. The Virgin Mary covered her hair and dressed modestly. In many countries, Christian’s cover their hair and call it veiling such as many countries in Eastern Europe and even the older Christian’s of the Middle East.

That is SO arrogant and ill informed.

Also there are many ways people interpret ‘freedom.’ For example, some argue that the pressure on women to look a certain way, show skin, or meet beauty standards also stems from patriarchal, oppressive and misogynistic expectations. So, is that really freedom either? The point is it’s complicated, and reducing a woman’s choice to ‘oppression’ just because it doesn’t match someone else’s norms is unfair.

Woking is a good call - the first Mosque in the UK was built there in the late 1800’s. Visiting Chertsey does give me the feel of a 1960’s neighbourhood (ie.
not very diverse) so if you felt uncomfortable there I would advise you not to move there. As PP’s have mentioned, Addlestone and Weybridge are more diverse, but I think they are more expensive, but the other direction, Hanworth and Whitton are also, as I remember, quite nice and on the up, and very diverse.

Completely agree with your points on women looking a certain way and feeling compelled to wear skimpy clothes to satisfy the male gaze. Good luck in your quest to find somewhere to live where you feel safe and happy.