Siblings at different secondary schools out of choice

[Hannah881]

My youngest starts secondary school in September, he has a place at the same school that older sibling attends which is our catchment school (children are two years apart).
However he wants to go to a different local secondary school where the majority of his class friends are going to. He is at the top of their waiting list and so there is possibly a fairly good chance of a space becoming available before Sept.

Am I being selfish in wanting him to go to his catchment school, his sibling also really really wants him to attend there aswel and is quite sad at the thought of him not. The thought of them not having a shared school experience bothers me - but I also remember I did not even speaking to my brother when we attended the same school.

Logistically two different secondary schools can be done as there is a staggered start/finish time and he should have friends to travel with. I can totally see his point of view that his choice of school is more exciting for him and offers good sports facilities and his main friends will be there.
Although he will also have friends at his catchment school and we have had a fair few bumpy times in the past with these main friends - although it did seem to work its self out.
Feeling very torn as want both children to be happy.

At one point I had dc in 4 different schools and 1 at college.

Logistical nightmare.. 2 schools? meh. Doddle...

I don't agree with posters who say the child should decide. I am assuming you are talking about a child of 11? Yes you take their opinion into consideration and factor it in to any decision. But at 11 they are not making the decisions. Parents are.

If they are two equally good schools I think the child should pick.

Obviously no good parent would let their child pick the dive school over a good school for no good reason.

But two schools both rated good both with the same progress scores. Completely the child’s choice I’d say. After all they are the one stuck going there and an unhappy child isn’t conductive to learning.

Personally if the logistics work I'd let him. I am assuming the school he wants is further out? Might be worth discussing with him how socialising with his friends would work out of school. I.e is he able to get a late bus back and get around without needing lifts all the time. It's all well and good wanting to be with his friends but not at the detriment of family life to enable the friendships or extracurricular activities he might do.

Of course it depends where you live. We live rurally, our neighbours kids went to different secondary schools. Both were able to use school buses, one went to the local comp and the other to an inner city Catholic school.

To be honest I never see the neighbours kids bring friends home or go out. Could easily go to school miles away for all they seem to socialise in person. Had I not seen them daily leaving and coming back I'd never know they'd got teenagers next door. So maybe it doesn't matter if teens don't see friends outside of school nowadays maybe.

I would let them go to the school their friends are going to. I have 3 children all in different schools due to additional needs.

I knew several sets of siblings at different schools when I was school age and now I know various adults whose children are at different schools for a whole variety of reasons. It doesn’t seem to be an issue.