Aibu To give our entire Holiday spending budget to DS ?

[frozenshoulderhell]

Or do I risk living on bread and cheese by day three? Me and DS aged 15 are off on a self catering holiday to a popular Mediterranean country and My reasoning is that it would be a good 'life lesson' in budgeting. He'd have to budget for trips,drinks,supermarket for breakfast /lunch /snacks and evening restaurant meals -I've worked out that we can afford roughly 3 or 4 day trips and to eat out every evening although it will have to be a combination of 'nice' restaurants and more basic options...
I personally think that it would be good for him to learn that if we have 15 drinks from around the pool and three ice creams a day then there will be less money to spend on something else but
if we buy a pack of ice creams from the supermarket and nip back to the apartment for some drinks at 1/4 of the price then we will be able to eat at a nice sea food restaurant (for example) that night!
My friend is horrified and thinks it too much responsibility but as he usually spends his monthly pocket money on day one I think it would be a good way to each him good money management skills ? I do consider myself to have pretty good budgeting skills where as my ex is completely rubbish and I'd hate for him to end up like that .

Lovely idea.

Never doing it.

ADHD child has very different spending priorities to us and would be on a complete power trip!

He might not prioritise the same as you. I went on holiday with a friend last year who went and bought water, salads and ice cream from the supermarket. Fuck that, I’m on holiday, I paid for them all around the pool. A cheap bag of chips of an evenings does me, whereas some people like the expensive three course al carte meals.

Sorry no but I wouldn't do this on a holiday..surely this is meant to be a relaxing time away together, not with the added pressure for them of getting it right with the budget and you worrying if they are doing it right.

Exactly this.

This happened to my husband actually his parents did the same it taught him some brilliant life lessons.
Personally I would do a scalled back approach of not giving the entire budget rather the budget minus meal money so he has to calculate the luxuries and save some to hopefully get a "special" meal on the last night.
Too much can go wrong giving the whole lot.

I wouldn’t just give him says 1k. But maybe the daily budget each day. That way if he blows it, it’s only cheese on crackers that day.

Just do it on a daily basis. Let him know what the daily budget is and let him plan the day accordingly.

I let my 13 year old and two 8 year olds do our weekly food shop!! We had a lot of pudding that week. Lots of veg. Not so much meat!

Just go enjoy your holiday and relax, don't turn it into a lesson.
I agree with other posters, teach him at home.

Don't give him all of it, just give him a daily "allowance" for things like drinks, ice-creams etc, and tell him that once he has spent it then that's it. You pay for meals out/day trips but he's responsible for his own spends.

I think it's too much at 15yr old given his impulsive spending history just to hand it over and say there ya go son you're in charge but I do think it's a great idea to get him involved 50/50 in the decision making. You may have to accept him making different decisions to you on certain things but this way he learns to budget, to compromise and to take responsibility

Maybe not complete free reign, but can you sit down together and plan your days with the overall budget in mind. He will quickly see that he can't afford certain combinations. Leave room to change things, so you can decide actually we don't need ice cream today, but let's spend today and tomorrow's ice cream money on coffee and cake today. If by the end of the week no ice cream money then so be it. But have a rough idea for the week of expensive activities Tuesday, free swimming and mooching Wednesday.

I wouldn't enjoy that as an adult, at 15 it's not a life lesson but more of a lesson in ruining a holiday.

this. He might still learn the lesson you're trying to teach, without the risk of affecting the whole holiday.

But also, would you really be prepared to stick to it, if he spends all his money within the first few days? Would you really be able to sit there enjoying an icecream every evening while he stares at you like a hungry dog? Because either you would limit yourself too, or you'd feel guilty and think 'Oh, what the hell, we're on holiday, I can give my son a quid for an icecream' give in and buy one for him, which would teach him the exact opposite.

I think it's a great idea, but that I would perhaps keep an emergency reserve just in case you need it. If he keeps within the amount he is given you can use the emergency reserve for a special treat on the last day.

Sounds stressful. Like he's being given homework on holiday. Teach him at home.

Christ, just let the poor lad enjoy his holiday.

Any life lessons can be learnt when you get home.

We used to give ds a monthly allowance and he paid his own school lunches, mobile phone/data allowance, barbers, socialising etc and he had to budget with it. He soon learnt if he bought sports drinks and cake every day at school lunch he’d quickly have no money left for the rest so filling his water bottle was a better choice.

I wouldn’t risk stress during your holiday if he hasn’t done the basics of budgeting in a familiar environment first

Maybe try it for a day, with a days worth of the money. Not the whole trip!

I’d do the talking it through option - “we have £100 per day; if we do this trip shall we just grab a slice of pizza for dinner so we don’t leave ourselves short for tomorrow?” That sort of thing. Involve him in the decision- making process.

I would give him this task for his snacks and drinks and souvineers only! No way would I risk my wine and ice cream fund being wasted

What's the point of a holiday like this? It's going to be stressful for both of you instead of fun.

He needs to be right budgeting in a less risky way.
Things like taking him with you food shopping for a meal you've planned to make together, where you can discuss options in real time and explain why you'd choose the bag of saver carrots over the organic version etc

Like good budgeting I think th reasons need to be little and often, spread out and integrated into real life, not a massive high stakes test you already know he'll fail.