my other half and I are in our forties and have children from previous relationships who have different routines. We live together and it’s a busy house.
He says I tease him a lot about sex because I will make a flirty comment during the day, he gets his hopes up and then it doesn’t happen.
i often feel pressured as his idea of foreplay is waiting until the very end of the night, just as we’re about to go to sleep, to remind me of what was ‘promised’ earlier that day.
when he spoke to me about feeling teased, I said I’d like to share how I experience it so we can work out a solution together, but he said I shouldn’t do that, that I should instead acknowledge how he’s feeling. We argued about it for so long that when he finally said I could say how I felt, the moment was gone. He then said ‘ok, how about I tell you what I think you’re trying to say.’
the problem is we saw a relationship counsellor who did recommend that approach but only after both parties feel heard. He is a bit literal so when I said I needed some space, to give me a minute, he went off and came back saying he had given me five minutes because he timed it.
Id really like to get your thoughts on if I’m being unreasonable about sex and how he approaches it, and if I was in the wrong during the argument.
I have noticed a pattern where he gets like this every time we have a family event that day, but not sure if it’s a coincidence