Am I being too sensitive re school awards?

[Angels1111]

I work in a SEN school and when we give feedback to our children it's worded in the positive, ie we focus praising that they've learned xyz skill etc and their good qualities.
We of course focus on what they need to learn too but we very much highlight skills they already have.

My son goes to a mainstream (has SEN but not severe enough for a SEN school). He just had his school awards and I just found it...odd.

But here are some examples of awards:

• found school hard due to SEN but showed great resilience in turning up and trying every day
• not academic but any skill they do learn they share with their friends which encouraged peer to peer learning
• found it hard to concentrate all year, just wanted to play, but by the end would sit down to do the learning and had matured
• didn't like to do messy play but very diligent with reading

Is this normal in a mainstream setting? In our setting
...of course we would constantly be working on the bits that needed work, we wouldn't have mentioned them in a public award ceremony.
I am just getting a feel on MN as my view may have been skewed working in SEN.

YABU - this is fine to word awards in that way
YANBU - there was no need to list a childs weaknesses during an award ceremony, she could have just said "has resilience, plays well with friends, diligent with reading" etc

They are poor, just frame it positively. I’d complain

Did all the kids get awards or just some? I agree in that it’s so negative based and some of the comments aren’t even relevant - like doesn’t like messy play. Has the teacher come from an older year? Things like not being academic and him maturing are weird phrasing for reception

I'd be complaining.

Persevered and has shown great resilience in attending school

Promoting peer on peer by sharing skills he has learned with his friends

He has perservered with his learning and concentration and engages well in lessons

Has a love of books and is a diligent reader

nothing else had to be said. It's the early years for crying out loud

The problem with awards in a mainstream setting is that you have such a wide range of ability. The reality is that some children (especially sometimes those with SEN) will be the worst at everything, always. It isn't fair to the other kids to give those children awards for being the best in something that they aren't the best in. Yet in reality, those SEN children may have worked harder and made more progress that your typical star kids.

That's very badly written awards!

This ^

Was it publicly stated at the ceremony that a child had SEND?

I think that is quite a serious data breach

YANBU The top two at least are sharing sensitive personal information. How awful to announce to the whole of year R and all the parents that child 1 has SEN. They might not even know themselves at that age.

All got an award. Not a new teacher and always has done early years but is leaving. I'm glad to get this feedback on MN as I felt weird all year about things.

Yep to the whole class /parents. I've always said I don't mind people knowing but I didn't mean "make it a part of his award ceremony announcement" !

I would but there doesn't seem to be any point when it's the last day and she's leaving

I think that personally I would still want to raise the issue (with PP's suggestions of acceptable alternatives) even if the staff member responsible is leaving. It needs to be pointed out that this really isn't acceptable on many points, so that on the next occasion it can be done very differently. You wouldn't want the next person doing it in a similar style, thinking "This is the way Mrs Jones did it, so I'll keep to her formula". You would hope that most, if not all, of the staff were thinking WTF, but they may not have been and it would be best to call a halt to it asap. Revealing that a pupil has SEND is just awful...

I would be making a serious, official complaint about this.

I would also file a second complaint with Offstead.

I would give the teacher a diploma and an award for creating the most stupid, insensitive awards ever made. As a mother to a SEN child I would definitely complain to the head about the negative wordings and also talking publicly about his SEN.

The awards were badly worded, but I don’t think it’s a bed thing that they highlighted challenges that have been overcome.

Awards that just celebrate being good at maths or reading where children have found it relatively easy to learn, or that praise 2 minutes of positive behaviour amongst a majority of negative behaviour are pointless.

A bit lighthearted but DD struggled in primary, she was not academically gifted and struggled with the basics. Because of this she never got star of the month and was gutted.

One month in Year 3 she finally got Star of the month, she was so happy and said how she had been trying really hard at her maths and English and was so happy to get an award.

Till i looked at the certificate, she won Star of the month for winning the egg and spoon race. Was a bit of a bullshit reason but it made her happy.

I totally agree with you, it’s really clumsily worded.

I’ve just seen one in an R class which was ‘X has shown real improvement at sitting on the carpet’.

We can all read between the lines, but it’s worded nicely!

My DC's Yr 6 leavers' assembly was exactly like this this week. There were two classes and the first teacher went through every child individually, praising their different abilities and what they brought to the classroom. If there were jokes they were along the lines of 'and Fred probably has the sharpest pencil in the class, he spends so long sharpening it.' She also got emotional whilst speaking about them and you could tell she really cared.

Then my DC's teacher got up and I'd say about 75% of her comments were things like 'And when you eventually manage to finally focus, you bring X to the classroom' or 'it's only taken you all year but you've finally learnt to put away the fidget toys when you've finished with them' (this to the child with autism who really relies on fidget toys to get through the school day). I think she meant it to be funny but it just seemed like a shame - she only had about two sentences per pupil and she couldn't just say something uncomplicatedly nice! It seems the same with the awards you're talking about - why not just be 100% positive? What's gained from mentioning the negatives, especially when they don't even have relevance? (eg. the dislike of messy play)

This wouldn't really bother me. I assume it's to give encouragement to children who also have problems with those things, to show they shouldn’t write themselves off because they can still do well despite the issue in question. There would be no point in giving an award for resilience in turning up and trying hard every day to a child who was good at all schoolwork. I must say I don’t see the point of the "messy play" reference, though.

But if it’s just that teacher, rather than a school policy, and they’re leaving anyway, there doesn’t seem much point in complaining.

These seem odd, generally you wouldn't put a positive and a negative into an award, unless it was relevant, and if you did you'd try to phrase it in a much more positive way. EG

• found school hard due to SEN but showed great resilience in turning up and trying every day

Becomes: We know Timmy found school hard at the start of the year, but has shown great resilience, and tries hard every day, which is why we're awarding him as our 'Resilient Rockstar'.

• not academic but any skill they do learn they share with their friends which encouraged peer to peer learning

Becomes: Jenny hasn't had the easiest time with some of our classwork this year, but has worked so hard to gain so many skills outside the classroom and has been excellent at sharing this knowledge and teaching others, which is why we're awarding her our 'Tremendous Teacher' Award.

• found it hard to concentrate all year, just wanted to play, but by the end would sit down to do the learning and had matured

Becomes: Joe has worked really hard to develop his focusing and concentrations skills since starting school in September, which is why he's our classes 'Fantastic Focus'er'

• didn't like to do messy play but very diligent with reading

Becomes: Helen has been trying lots of different skills this year, and has discovered a love of reading, which she has diligently been practicing every day. For this reason she's our 'Reading Superstar'.

sorry the school actually said those things?! I would be really annoyed and would have had to say something.

How the hell do you describe a five year old as not academic. I am a retired teacher and now a grandmother of a bright five year old. But is she academic? Not at five years old.

Yanbu. Why would they announce to the parents your dc isn't academic or has SEN at an awards ceremony? It's not other people's business.

They should share the positives in public and keep the negative / developmental aspects to a private discussion with the parents. I would also check for direct and indirect discrimination such as if non SEN children had same treatment or not, and the very fact they mentioned SEN in a negative way.

YANBU, some things are only to be said to the child's parents.

I'd be tempted were that acceptable to say 'despite her parents poor standard of parking and turning up in pyjamas and a dry robe, xx takes great care in his/her work to ensure it is neat and tidy'.