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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend said my cat attacked her

57 replies

Panther40 · 16/07/2025 09:49

Friend is a full time pet sitter and I have 2 male cats, I sometimes book her to look after them when I'm away.
Both males are older and very affectionate, they like just sitting with you all day but still a little playful sometimes.

Got them together a year ago and neither have ever scratched or bitten or anything like that. One will occasionally bat you playfully, anyway friend has sat for them several times.

She was talking about another cat she sits for who's bitten and scratched her. She then dropped into the conversation 'Oh your cat scratched me 3 times but I just accept it for what it is."

I was surprised because she'd never mentioned it, i asked her what had happened, she said she'd tried to stroke him and he did that. I felt bad because as I say he's never done it to me or my partner before, I felt embarrassed really.

Not sure what I could do? I mean there's no way of knowing with these things or if I could prevent it but I do feel bad.

OP posts:
BeamMeUpCountMeIn · 16/07/2025 18:10

I wouldn't expect anything less from a cat.

Catladywithoutacat · 16/07/2025 18:12

She hasn’t tried to take you to court so forget about it… cats are assholes it’s a fact

WingBingo · 16/07/2025 18:14

That’s what cats do

NewsdeskJC · 16/07/2025 18:14

Id not give it another thought. It's her chosen job. What you gonna do? Have words with him? Do a sticker chart?

DangerousAlchemy · 16/07/2025 18:20

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 16/07/2025 11:58

I bet she didnt ask permission.

I see so many people just put their hand out and try to stroke a cat, often on the top of the head!
Of course, most cats respond to that with a what the fuck reaction.

If you want to stroke someone's cat you have to put your hand out and let them sniff it. If they head bump it, scent marking it or otherwise give a positive sign, then you can stroke them. Preferably on the chin or side of face.

Some cats are happy to skip the good manners 😁 but it's always better to be polite.

I've had people come round and try to stroke my cat without asking her if its OK and the look on her face is hilarious!

yeah 100% this! I'm fostering 5 kittens who are 9 weeks old and 3 of them are hand-shy and cower back if anyone strokes on top of their heads. They like to sniff fingers then they accept chin strokes. If they're fast asleep or very sleepy I can usually stroke them more as obviously im teying to get them used to being handled as we have lots of vet trips coming up. The OP's cats are calm and friendly with her but when she's away and the cats are anxious about her absence it's a whole different ball game.

PeapodMcgee · 16/07/2025 18:23

She sounds like a shit cat sitter tbh, if she doesn't understand how to communicate with them without getting a beating!

She should also be washing her hands inbetween cat clients so they don't get worried by stranger cat smells.

TangibleLemon · 16/07/2025 18:49

Just looking down at my arms I have about 3 recent scratches from my younger cat, older guy tends to gouge pieces of my lap out when he sits on my knee. As pp mentioned it's just what cats do, so probably just a throw away comment from your friend.

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