Long story shortish, 25 years together, never married but 2 DC now pretty much grown up. Hands up - reason for splitting is something I did 18 -20 years ago which he never got over. In Feb 23 we agreed to trial separation, at that time both DC's still in school. We jointly bought a 1 bed flat a short walk from our home (which involved us remortgaging the house). We agreed that rather than uproot the kids we'd live as normal a family life as possible at home, but one or the other would each take turns to stay in the flat for a few days at a time and the other at home with the kids. It worked pretty well. We agreed 💯 that neither was allowed to bring a date or even potential date to the flat, not that either of us was looking but given the history it had to be said.
In recent months it looked like we might reconcile, we've slept together a handful of times, but apart from once we've not spent the whole night together.
But then he took on a work role that meant travelling to another city 1-2 days a month, occasionally more than that, always returning home at the end of each day despite a very long journey and he'd always keep in touch with me and the kids saying he didn't like being away. However his enthusiasm for his new colleagues, pretty much all female, is obvious. In one sense I'm glad he's got his mojo back, our separation was depressing and he wasn't himself for years which was sad to watch.
He says nothing has occurred between him anyone else and I believe him, at least so far. He recently brought me to a work function and it was obvious he's well liked among these female colleagues, evidently admired even by a couple and after a few drinks there was some pretty clear flirting, I'd say objectively, them more towards him. He's in his early 50's and physically looking better than he ever has.
It's niggled at me a bit since then, but yesterday he's told me he's offered one of these 'colleagues' to stay at the flat overnight midweek rather than her having to take a 2.5 hour train journey home late at night. I didn't make a massive issue of it, but when he could see that I was bothered he said he'd happily come and stay at the house with me, and that he was just trying to be kind and helpful.
AIBU to want to ask him where I stand?