To find it a real effort socialising in big groups now

[1973Ellenna]

I'm early 50s. Have always been introverted and enjoy my own company a lot.

Lately, I've had a hen, wedding and my tennis club social, and found them all hard work with constant chatting, the noise, and just feeling overwhelmed... I was counting down the hours till bedtime. I enjoyed them all somewhat but would rather have been curled up with my book. I'm not shy, can chat to anyone, but lots of times I don't feel like it now.

AIBU and am I odd?

Perfectly normal. I hate gib groups dynamics with repetitive small talk every time you bump into a new person.... the horror!

Nothing odd at all, I prefer small group, one-to-one or my own company too.

If this feeling has got significantly worse recently though then it is worth getting a hearing test as early hearing loss can make social events feel more draining.

This is really normal across whatever age a person is, typically people who are introverted, sensitive or neurodivergent.

I don't like groups either. I'm introverted and find them noisy and overwhelming. I much prefer one to one meet ups over a coffee and cake ☕️ 🍰

I hate large groups , the smaller number of people the better for me . As I get older I’m grateful to have lots of friends but sometimes I just prefer to potter at home . I’m getting much better at declining invitations now though . I’m a homebody at heart

I mean, I can't really vote as you feel how you feel.
YANBU to feel any particular way.
OTOH I don't think (amongst the population at large, not the rather insular population on MN) it is particularly usual to dislike going out in your 50s.

That was an age when I started going out a lot more again, as no longer needed babysitters, or to be home when dc got home, and also when finances started not being such an issue.
So, for me, 50s and 60s have been much better for socialising, and enjoying time with friends than those busy years in my 30s and 40s.

I do go out a lot but I find one to one or two more enjoyable.

A few years younger than you but feel exactly the same. I love my alone time at home with the dog and my DS if he is around, i like socialising 1-1. I have always been socially anxious and increasingly avoid any group activities. Push myself if i have to, ie someone’s birthday

I’m like you op. Also need my own time and prefer small groups to large. But no, in my experience it isn’t the norm, most people I know recharge their batteries by being with people and are more outgoing.

I agree.

I like socialising but I don't like noise