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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I a stingy mother ??

26 replies

SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 22:24

I entered a raffle , which was part of DCs sports team. It was to raise funds and it was one of those “ pick a team “ cards and the winner gets a certain amount of money. I had 2 goes , so spent £10 and the prize pot was £100. The name of the entrants on the card , was the child on the team ( so if I chose Man City it would say “ DC name “ on it and the winner would be announced as DC name ) .

DC says they should get the winnings if I win, because it’s their team and their name . I say “ Nice try ! “

YABU - stop being a stingy mother and give DC their rightful winnings .

YANBU - DC already lives rent free with a maid , personal chef and chauffeur ( aka stingy mother ) , you take those winnings !

……. side note , DC is 11 .

OP posts:
EggnogNoggin · 10/07/2025 22:27

😆 did child gamble their money to support the team? No? Go whistle, buddy!

Purpleballoo · 10/07/2025 22:41

Stingy. I’d share it out or spend it on a meal out for the family. Can’t imagine keeping money won from one of my dc’s activities all to myself

CaptainFuture · 10/07/2025 22:43

EggnogNoggin · 10/07/2025 22:27

😆 did child gamble their money to support the team? No? Go whistle, buddy!

🎤👇

What she said!

Lovesstaggbeetle · 10/07/2025 22:45

I d definitely share some and put the rest into their savings axxount

Lovesstaggbeetle · 10/07/2025 22:46

Ps I know it's light hearted but DD didn't ask to be brought into this world with a chauffeur and a maid.

Sorry as you were 😀

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/07/2025 22:47

I'd spend it all on fags and gin.

simsbustinoutmimi · 10/07/2025 22:47

I think I would share some. £100 is a fortune to a child and you only spent a tenner. I think it’s a bit rubbish to keep the £90 for yourself. I think I would give them £20-£30.

Hankunamatata · 10/07/2025 22:51

Your money if you paid

Glowinglights · 10/07/2025 22:52

I’d probably go £50/£50 or spend it on a family activity so everyone gets to enjoy a treat

steelingmyself · 10/07/2025 22:53

Yanbu but I think I’d spend it on something nice for the family.

MermaidMummy06 · 10/07/2025 22:56

Haha. DS12 AND DD9 would try this on, just to try their luck. They'd know I wasn't just going to hand it over, though!

Although I'd probably spend it on an outing or let everyone something small. While reminding them gambling doesn't pay 😬

SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:02

EggnogNoggin · 10/07/2025 22:27

😆 did child gamble their money to support the team? No? Go whistle, buddy!

My kind of person!! 🤣

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:03

Purpleballoo · 10/07/2025 22:41

Stingy. I’d share it out or spend it on a meal out for the family. Can’t imagine keeping money won from one of my dc’s activities all to myself

I mean , my mental plan ( I didn’t win ! ) was to use it to book some train tickets for a day out in the holidays … but that helps me as I planned to do it anyway , but go short somewhere else !

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:04

Lovesstaggbeetle · 10/07/2025 22:45

I d definitely share some and put the rest into their savings axxount

Oh , forgot to add - I’m poor , no savings accounts unfortunately!

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:05

Lovesstaggbeetle · 10/07/2025 22:46

Ps I know it's light hearted but DD didn't ask to be brought into this world with a chauffeur and a maid.

Sorry as you were 😀

He didn’t ask to be born … but can assure you he is full command of the maid and chauffeur 🤣

OP posts:
JMSA · 10/07/2025 23:06

I’d split it. To do otherwise seems a bit mean.

SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:06

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 10/07/2025 22:47

I'd spend it all on fags and gin.

No , he’s not fond of gin and is trying to give up the fags !

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:07

JMSA · 10/07/2025 23:06

I’d split it. To do otherwise seems a bit mean.

I said I would have gave him £10 , the stake back …

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:08

MermaidMummy06 · 10/07/2025 22:56

Haha. DS12 AND DD9 would try this on, just to try their luck. They'd know I wasn't just going to hand it over, though!

Although I'd probably spend it on an outing or let everyone something small. While reminding them gambling doesn't pay 😬

In all honesty he knows full well, aside from my occasional Starbucks and a set of nails once a month all money goes on him anyway 🤣 so he knows this would be the same … I just wouldn’t be allowing him to spend it on sweets and teddies !

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:10

simsbustinoutmimi · 10/07/2025 22:47

I think I would share some. £100 is a fortune to a child and you only spent a tenner. I think it’s a bit rubbish to keep the £90 for yourself. I think I would give them £20-£30.

Jokes aside, it would have gone on the children. I had spent it in my head on a day out! Wouldn’t have handed £100 cash over to him though , he would have ordered me to chauffeur him into the city centre to buy £100 worth of teddies to add to the 100 on his bed currently !

OP posts:
SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:11

Hankunamatata · 10/07/2025 22:51

Your money if you paid

He did try to con me though and said if I won I could keep his £10 pocket money so it hadn’t cost me anything 🤣 he’s smart , I’ll give him that!

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 10/07/2025 23:17

You’re perfectly entitled to keep it I think!

I’d maybe share it in this case or spend it on something for the family as you planned.

Hankunamatata · 10/07/2025 23:24

SparklyOpalEagle · 10/07/2025 23:11

He did try to con me though and said if I won I could keep his £10 pocket money so it hadn’t cost me anything 🤣 he’s smart , I’ll give him that!

😂
Perhaps being a lawyer in his future?

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 23:26

Purpleballoo · 10/07/2025 22:41

Stingy. I’d share it out or spend it on a meal out for the family. Can’t imagine keeping money won from one of my dc’s activities all to myself

This!

Zanatdy · 10/07/2025 23:28

Of course it’s not his winnings. I’d tell him to go whistle, maybe after giving him a fiver or something.