Furious at ex H

[Brunocatmon]

Putting this here because i'm furious at what my ex h told our autistic dd and I dont want to get into a messy row. I promised my dd i wouldn't say anything but I just needed to vent.

Dd is 20. She told me that her father told her last year that he used to use work as an excuse not to come home and spend time with them ( the dc ) when we all lived as a family. He worked ridiculously long hours, early and late.

I'm fuming he told her that, what a cruel thing to tell your daughter. How did he possibly think that would make her feel?

He's not a nice man dressed up as being a nice man. I just wanted to get that off my chest because I promised her I wouldn't say anything.

What an arsehole!
You vent away @Brunocatmon .

She’s 20. Probably about time she got to know her father’s real personality.

Yep, that’s really nasty! How does your DD feel about it?

Your daughter likely figured out he didn't care to spend time with her when she was a kid. POS dads out themselves. He just confirmed it.

If he told her last year and she's just now telling you, she's not all that upset.

Vent away. What a prince amongst men. Probably only confirmed what your daughter already knew. Thank goodness your children had you.

It bothered her a lot but as time has gone on, as others have said she's learning his true personality. Shes autistic and struggled with telling on him. She feels enormous guilt that she feels very angry about the way he treated them growing up as they had a very financially privileged childhood with me at home. Its tough for her, and the others to separate those issues.

We've just been on holiday, myself and my 3 dd's and had some very honest chats.

She's angry and sad but with that comes guilt about those feelings. My heart breaks that I didnt shield them as much as I thought I had.

Oh many men do that unfortunately. I've lost all respect for at least 2 colleagues when they've said similar in meetings.

Not sure how you'd use that to make your DD feel better without making her disappointed in men though.