To want DS to have a smartphone for secondary school?

[SmartDumbPhoneAngst]

DS starts secondary school in September. The school allows students to have phones as long as they are never visible. We hope DS will eventually be able to make the journey to and from school himself, as it's a short and fairly easy journey by bus (or a long walk).

The school recommends that if parents think their child needs a phone, it should be a dumb phone, so they don't get addicted to social media, etc.

DH agrees.

I really want DS to have a locked-down smartphone so he can use maps and journey tools like citymapper, and so I can track him (and easily rescue him when if he gets lost).

DH vehemently disagrees. He says that at the school info meeting, they said all the kids know how to get around parental controls, so a dumb phone is the only way to keep them from having problems. (He went to the meeting instead of me, as I was watching DS.)

Since I know DH will win this one, I guess I'm also looking for anyone's recommendation of a dumb phone with gps and maps. Or, maybe tracker tags that don't require me to have an apple device to track them.

YABU = DS won't get lost without a smartphone. Do not give him one.
YANBU = It's fine to give DS a locked-down smartphone so he can get around.

I was looking at these balance phones. (For myself!!)

https://www.thebalancephone.com/?srsltid=AfmBOop6s2UFLtbfbwhj8AgQbQULG-6EPuSMI4JSfrTkLZu9JeUCnv3d

might be an option for you?

You don’t need to track your kid. I’d be overjoyed that the school was encouraging students to avoid social media.

Why do you think he’ll get lost? I would focus on helping him to feel confident with his route, both with walking and which stop to get off on the bus. He’ll probably be more alert and aware of his surroundings with a dumb phone anyway.

Also, if he does have a problem he can ring or text you and explain where he is if he’s lost? He can describe what he can see or find a street name. I think he’ll be fine!

Because he's autistic and (like me) not very good at navigation. I personally find it very comforting to know that if I get lost, I can look at the map on my phone and find my way. Maybe I'm projecting.

I think it is good to start to teach a 13 year what is useful about phones like maps and listening to Spotify and topping up your travel card and keeping a calendar while at the same time keeping them away from social media which is designed to be addictive and can be harmful.

OP, maybe a Pinwheel phone might be the answer? There was a thread about these earlier this year.

I like the idea of the balance or pinwheel phones, but I'm pretty sure DH is set on something more basic.

I suppose I'm being unreasonable. It's just that I know my kid, and I'm sure the day will come when he gets on the wrong bus, phones me, and describes his location as being "near a tree" or "by lots of houses". 🙄

And I will need to drop everything and spend forever finding him. But I guess I'll have to wait until it happens a few times before DH is convinced.

Hi op, what did you decide in the end?