Hi all, first time poster here as I just feel a bit lost.
Some background- me and OH have been together eight years. Two children eldest is two and the youngest five months.
OH has just got a new job which requires travelling for courses. He has been put on a course 20 miles away (45 min drive) and has asked for a hotel for the week. I never once got asked if it would be okay for me to be at home with the children all week I just kind of got told that’s what’s happening.
I wouldn’t usually mind if it was genuinely far, but the travel time is the same as his normal job anyway but he’s saying he cannot be at home that week because he needs to focus which I think is utter rubbish. He’s done this course before with his previous company and sailed through it as he said.
He works six nights per week out of seven and we spend no time together. I can never go out or see my friends because he’s constantly working and leaves at 8 pm every night just after the children go to bed so we literally get no time together
I always ask, can you just take one night off so we can go out and I always get the same response “ do you want me to just quit my job? It’s not that easy to just get time off”. But one night a week he doesn’t work he will lay on the sofa on his phone all night. I’m absolutely exhausted from doing all the nightwaking with the five month old that doesn’t sleep, doing all the school runs pick ups, groups and events.
My friends often comment that I’m always doing it on my own, which is true I kind of know what to do going forward but I just want some advice. I’ve told him that I’d rather he didn’t work away because I really need the help at home (for what it’s worth ) and he dismisses my thoughts
AIBU? Again, I wouldn’t mind if it was genuinely far, but it’s not. I feel like it’s just an excuse to not be at home and do whatever he wants for the week. Feeling fed up.