To not want to deal with drunk people?

[fridaynightbeers]

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a drink myself although I’m more of a “couple of drinks with friends/a glass of wine with a meal” type rather than “let’s get battered”.

DH likes to drink. Quite honestly I just can’t be bothered trying to hold a conversation with him when he gets back - it’s like going out to the pub when everyone else has been there all day and it’s boring.

I’d rather he just drank when I’m not around, or just come home and disappear to bed. Should I be polite and engage with him or is it fine for me to say “sorry, I just can’t be doing with this conversation that you’ll have forgotten about by tomorrow”?

Sometimes he goes out in the day time so it’s not like I can just go to bed in the spare room and avoid him 🤷🏼‍♀️ I feel the same about meeting other friends who’ve gone out earlier and had a few before I get there, it does my head in.

This could have been me!
Can't bear it when he goes out for 'a couple' (more like 4/5) at lunchtime, although he invariably falls asleep for the afternoon. Would much rather he went out in the evening and came home to bed.
He really can't hold his beer anymore.

Sounds horrible
how often does your dh get pissed?

He drinks a few times a week but probably only drinks a significant amount once a week

How old is he? Any children around?

I’m guessing by your user name… he’s getting pissed tonight

Christ! I couldn't deal with that at all, and thankfully have no drunks or even occasional excessive drinkers in my circle. Absolutely detest it.

Fifties, no kids

Sounds a very depressing way to live op.

Well thankfully it’s not every day! But I’m made to feel like I’m being rude if I don’t want to chat to him when he gets back. Glad to hear I’m not being unreasonable wanting to just be left alone.

That would annoy me because drunk people are annoying and can be selfish and he's doing it much more frequently than most 50 year olds.

If he does this every time then it’s definitely boring, but this part of your OP “ I feel the same about meeting other friends who’ve gone out earlier and had a few before I get there, it does my head in.” implies you are unusually sensitive about being around people who have had a drink.

Tell him straight you don’t want to talk to him when he’s drunk, as he’s annoying. But do it when he’s sober.

Nothing worse than being sober when everyone else is drunk. I went out very rarely when I was pregnant for this very reason.

No just tell him (when he’s sober) that talking to drunk people is dull, so he needs to entertain himself when inebriated. And then ignore.

I’d be worried though, by someone in their 50s getting smashed once a week. Has it got more frequent or has he always been like that?

Drunk people are annoying if you're not drunk yourself. Fact.

Drunks are irritating and frustrating fuckers. I hate them and am uncomfortable around them.

Your H sounds like he might well have a drink problem, whether he admits to it or not.

I don’t doubt that he drinks too much, definitely more units than is recommended by a considerable amount and certainly more than me.

Apart from trying to converse with me when he’s had too many he’s not a bad drunk. If he would just bugger off to bed I’d prefer it. I don’t know why I’m so sensitive about other people drinking when I’m sober, I find it really uncomfortable. My parents didn’t really drink so there’s no hidden trauma 🤷🏼‍♀️

How long has he been like this Op? Have you been enduring lonely nights interjected with a drunk smelly man trying to engage with you?

No, thankfully not.

I have my own life with plenty of friends/socialising, enjoy some time alone, and we go out together as well. It’s just these one off occasions when he’s been out all afternoon and comes back trying to act sober and chats nonsense to me that are annoying, and he makes out I’m unreasonable/moody when I don’t want to engage.

And I imagine the mornings after the night before are pretty annoying and depressing for you too OP

does he get rat arsed every night on holiday?