Fed up

[Greaseisthewordd]

So I have been asking my ex to do every other weekend and he won’t do it because it will affect his social life. He randomly puts dates into the joint calendar which suit him, he is going away for the weekend on such a date and he told me if I don’t allow the kids to go then he will not pick them up on the day he is supposed to as he will be away (it’s a planned thing with her new gf and her dc). I would be willing to agree to this but he literally does nothing to help me. The fact that he said he wouldn’t pick his kids up on his day because he will be away infuriated me, he is taking them because he has to do it, not because he wants to. After I told him no he then rang my daughter and asked her, he shouldn’t have done that.

I just find it really annoying that he isn’t going for the benefit of the kids, he is going anyway hence why he said he wouldn’t pick them up on his day. To be able to go he has to take them with him and I just think it is really selfish

but your daughter actively doesn’t want to spend time with her father. So his laziness works for their benefit.

Can you even feel comfortable and relax when they’re with him given how young they are?

I can’t relax no, I hate it when they go

He also has sleep apnea and I hate it when they are in the car with him, it’s so stressful letting them go

You misunderstood me. I was saying if he was willing to see them, he would have to see them on the particular schedule outlined by the court. If he isn't willing then having a schedule doesn't even enter into it.

But you also say you’re desperate for him to have them more so you get a break

and of course a court schedule would mean sweet FA if he doesnt stick to it. No court is going to force a parent to see their child. And surely you see that is a GOOD thing @Greaseisthewordd