To think people now use “trauma” to explain things that are just bad decisions?

[YourEdgyPeer]

Not every mistake is rooted in unresolved trauma. Sometimes people lie, ghost, cheat or lash out and it’s just poor behaviour.

AIBU to think we’ve over-psychologised everything to the point where accountability gets lost?

I don’t understand the question really.

Incidents in people’s lives can be traumatic and have a longer term impact on them.

The bit about accountability… I don’t get. They are responsible for those traumas or for continuing to think about them?

Go on, give us the example that has triggered the question.

Examples would be good.
some people use trauma as an understanding for their presentation, quite rightly, but there are so many grey areas to this question it’s hard to be 100% either way

I’m not saying trauma doesn’t exist or that people aren’t affected by what they’ve been through. It absolutely can shape behaviour. I’m just noticing a pattern where some people use ‘trauma’ as a blanket explanation for things like ghosting, cheating, or lashing out and any mention of accountability gets shut down as being ‘unsupportive.’ The post isn’t about blaming people for having trauma - it’s more about how the concept sometimes gets used to excuse actions that still hurt others. Hope that makes sense.

I think there has been a significant upsurge in cases the general population referencing psychological traits/history and conditions in everyday language in a way that diminishes people who have a clinical diagnosis/on a clinical pathway.

I have lost count of how many times I’ve heard “I’m a bit OCD about…” (no, you cant be a bit OCD, it’s bloody life consuming) or “I have anxiety” (no you are perfectly reasonable about being anxious about a specific thing/event” and so on.

Trauma is just another example. Finding something traumatic rather than uncomfortable/upsetting.

A lot of people use these terms without really thinking because they have become common parlance, not always because they are trying to
excuse behaviours.

For others it is deliberate, for attention for example or to evade responsibility.

I find it very tiresome if I’m honest and have no skin in the game here so goodness knows how frustrated people with a history of actual trauma/MH diagnoses feel about these words been used so indiscriminately.

I think there has been a significant upsurge in cases the general population referencing psychological traits/history and conditions in everyday language in a way that diminishes people who have a clinical diagnosis/on a clinical pathway.

I have lost count of how many times I’ve heard “I’m a bit OCD about…” (no, you cant be a bit OCD, it’s bloody life consuming) or “I have anxiety” (no you are perfectly reasonable about being anxious about a specific thing/event” and so on.

Trauma is just another example. Finding something traumatic rather than uncomfortable/upsetting.

A lot of people use these terms without really thinking because they have become common parlance, not always because they are trying to
excuse behaviours.

For others it is deliberate, for attention for example or to evade responsibility.

I find it very tiresome if I’m honest and have no skin in the game here so goodness knows how frustrated people with a history of actual trauma/MH diagnoses feel about these words been used so indiscriminately.

I think there has been a significant upsurge in cases the general population referencing psychological traits/history and conditions in everyday language in a way that diminishes people who have a clinical diagnosis/on a clinical pathway.

I have lost count of how many times I’ve heard “I’m a bit OCD about…” (no, you cant be a bit OCD, it’s bloody life consuming) or “I have anxiety” (no you are perfectly reasonable about being anxious about a specific thing/event” and so on.

Trauma is just another example. Finding something traumatic rather than uncomfortable/upsetting.

A lot of people use these terms without really thinking because they have become common parlance, not always because they are trying to
excuse behaviours.

For others it is deliberate, for attention for example or to evade responsibility.

I find it very tiresome if I’m honest and have no skin in the game here so goodness knows how frustrated people with a history of actual trauma/MH diagnoses feel about these words been used so indiscriminately.

Opps no idea what happened there.

Can't vote because yes and no!

By way of example, I have clinical diagnoses of (C)PTSD and depression. These can make me respond in unhelpful ways to situations we'd now call 'triggering'.

But it's my problem and my responsibility. I have no right to demand special consideration from other people, who probably have their own stuff going on. It's down to me to walk away from scenarios I can't handle, to challenge awkward people if I can do it reasonably, and to bloody well apologise if I've kicked off or been a miserable cunt.

In short, I'm sorry if you can't cope but it's nobody else's job to make you feel better. If you're having a panic attack, I might help you get control of your breathing but I ain't sitting there listening to your self-pitying histrionics.

I find it extremely taxing to keep quiet while people moan about things they should be dealing with - it's different if they're actually talking about how to deal with them.

While I was in AA, there was always some twat whining about how his life was so awful that he had to drink. Clearly, everybody there had a reason they drank too much. Everybody else was doing their best to find better ways of coping but that guy, he shouldn't even have to try.

Well, fuck all the that guys and their selfish, whingeing, irresponsible specialness!