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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to go automatic only for daughter's driving lessons?

203 replies

flawless234 · 30/06/2025 13:27

My daughter's only just started her driving lessons, and we've opted for automatic exclusively. Why, you ask? Well, it just seems obvious to me.
A few of her friends are learning manual too, and they're clearly in the majority, which my daughter feels. But, logically speaking, and I'd be interested to know what you all think, I'm thinking that we're seeing more automatic cars on the roads these days. Plus, with the rise of electric cars, they're automatic anyway. I, for one, haven't driven a manual since 2016 since I switched to an automatic then and honestly, I'm never going back.
I've found that getting an automatic instructor is a bit of a challenge, simply because there are fewer of them. So, I'm just wondering, what's the logic behind the newer generation, or kids now, starting to learn manual? Does it really make much of a difference? I don't think it will.
In my opinion, learning manual seems like more of a hassle. You're trying to master driving and controlling the car, and then on top of that, you're learning all about road safety and everything else. It just seems like too much fuss, if you ask me.
AIBU to think that learning automatic is the more sensible option these days?

OP posts:
Shinyandnew1 · 30/06/2025 15:07

I've found that getting an automatic instructor is a bit of a challenge

Well, that'll be one reason people don't do it you thought of all by yourself!

It's limiting what you can drive, eg hire cars or if you get with a partner and get insured on each others' vehicles, you might not be able to drive it.
It means you're restricted in buying an automatic for your first car which is going to be more expensive.

Jamesblonde2 · 30/06/2025 15:08

Yes there’s more automatic. But hire cars in small resorts abroad, jumping in a friends van (insured) to deliver something, using a spouse or relatives car who have manual. Honestly I’ve done all of that and it’s not that hard to drive manual and have that extra bit of flexibility. We all managed it when we were 17. Do manual and then she’s covered, just in case. It’s limiting oneself. Oh, driving a classic car too, I’ve done that plenty.

TonTonMacoute · 30/06/2025 15:09

Well, obviously when you first start it seems very overwhelming, but you grow in confidence as you improve.

Personally I think an automatic only license is a waste of time and money, and frankly I would be nervous as the passenger of someone who was worried about how complicated changing gear manually is.

BeamMeUpCountMeIn · 30/06/2025 15:12

"In ten years, I believe we’ll hardly see any manual cars on the road".
I think that's massively optimistic. There's millions of homes without driveways or their own parking space, they will probably be hanging on to their manual petrol cars for as long as possible. I will probably have to get a new manual car in the early 30's as I don't have a parking space to charge an EV.

MrsEMR · 30/06/2025 15:12

My DD passed her driving test this year on an automatic car. Her original lessons were on a manual car, but she struggled with them, failed her test & gave up driving for a year.

As I felt not driving would limit her career choices I helped her buy a small automatic VW and she absolutely loves driving now. She has gained so much confidence since passing and that to me is the main thing.

SweetPeaTower · 30/06/2025 15:13

I am team manual

What if she gets a job & needs to drive a company vehicle in the future ?

Or drive abroad

Or drive classic / vintage

Haveanaiceday · 30/06/2025 15:14

If your dd started on manual and was struggling then it might make sense, but I'd at least start out with manual and see how she gets on. A lot of people don't find the gear changes that difficult.

Wexone · 30/06/2025 15:14

I have an automatic love it - have had it 8 years now love it - however over the past years i have had manual aswell, i got my license as a manual. My husband has changed jobs and we now have a farm part time. Most machinery is manual, tractor is manual and so is the jeep to pull a trailer or horsebox. If my licence was automatic there be no way i would be able to drive any of them and therefore not able to help my husband where required. Manual is still predominately out there and severely limiting for the future i just wouldn't do it - go for manual test and you are covered for best of both

ShesTheAlbatross · 30/06/2025 15:16

Insurance is cheaper if you have a manual licence, even if it’s for an automatic car.

Newbutoldfather · 30/06/2025 15:18

I think it is much safer to learn on an automatic, so your whole focus is on the road and not the gearbox.

it is a fundamental principle of teaching to avoid cognitive overload and only teach one thing at a time. But this is ignored in driving.

Once someone has practised for a year or two and is totally competent and confident, learning gears (if you want to) is incredibly easy.

The only issue is the cost of extra lessons and an extra test.

TizerorFizz · 30/06/2025 15:18

There’s loads of horse boxes that are auto! Very many large multi horse ones!

Id probably just go auto if you have enough for auto cars for dc to drive. Cheap little petrol cars as autos use more fuel and are slow. DD2 had a Manuel car in 2012 and that’s the last one in this house. She’s not going to have manual again. Far too much hassle in London. DH has had various 911s and current Cayman is auto. Yes, electric cars can be a bit quick but only if you are trying! You can poodle if you want to. You learn this by being mature about driving. I find auto easier but until mid 80s would never have considered one. These days they are pleasant to drive.

BeamMeUpCountMeIn · 30/06/2025 15:19

Ah, petrol is being phased out in 2030, not 35. I've got four years to save up!

BogRollBOGOF · 30/06/2025 15:20

If there aren't factors such as dyspraxia in the equation, I'd still default to a manual licence.

Long term the benefits of being able to drive manual will diminish, but the people most likely to struggle for choice in the next few years are younger drivers with lower incomes.

There are many cars from the 2000s-2010s still on the roads. There would have been more from the 1990s without the scrapage scheme from the late 2000s. We're a long way from manuals being fully replaced by automatics/ electric.

Tiredofwhataboutery · 30/06/2025 15:22

My eldest is 14 and I’ll probably go automatic too. I drive an automatic do easier to practice. Fewer manuals around. They can always do a manual test later if want to. My friend was telling me his HGV lorry is now an automatic.

I get the point that manual gives more options but it’s a time/ cost balance snd at £40-50 ph to learn an additional skill they may never use.

drspouse · 30/06/2025 15:26

DD is 11 (DS is 13 but has epilepsy) and we are wondering whether when we come to need our next new car, we go for automatic or manual. I have a feeling by the time she's 17 even places where now it's mainly manual car hire will be automatic - and even more so by the time she's able to rent a car i.e. 25 or so.

We are hiring a car this summer and while I'm fine with RH drive manual, DH doesn't like it, so we are getting an automatic.

Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim · 30/06/2025 15:27

I’m dyspraxic. I really struggled learning to drive. I had about 80 hours of lessons. I really struggled with gear changes and hill starts. I’m glad I persevered with the manual though. It’s made me a much more competent driver and ensured I wasn’t on the road before I was actually ready.

IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos · 30/06/2025 15:27

BeamMeUpCountMeIn · 30/06/2025 15:12

"In ten years, I believe we’ll hardly see any manual cars on the road".
I think that's massively optimistic. There's millions of homes without driveways or their own parking space, they will probably be hanging on to their manual petrol cars for as long as possible. I will probably have to get a new manual car in the early 30's as I don't have a parking space to charge an EV.

Also, the manual cars aren't going to vanish. It's just that more new cars are being made as manuals. The second hand market is still there, and I honestly haven't ever bought a car that was less than 6 years old, more commonly they're at least 10. I know a lot of people who are similar, because we prefer to buy outright rather than lease or go for finance.

So in 10 years time, the people like me will be buying today's new cars, or maybe older, as second hand. And there's still a lot of manuals in that pool.

IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos · 30/06/2025 15:29

BeamMeUpCountMeIn · 30/06/2025 15:19

Ah, petrol is being phased out in 2030, not 35. I've got four years to save up!

It's not being phased out as in all the petrol stations will vanish. It's just that new cars won't be built with a petrol option. Petrol cars will be an option in the second hand market for as long a people want them and the fuel stations provide it.

Tangerinenets · 30/06/2025 15:29

Both mine learned in a manual. I think it’s important to know how to drive one. Years ago my friend got really really ill and collapsed. Being fairly near the hospital I took her and drove her car. We were told the ambulances were really busy that night and it was good I brought her in, probably saved her life. If I had learned in an auto it could have been a different story.

also some jobs require a full uk driving licence. An automatic licence is not a full licence.

StarCourt · 30/06/2025 15:33

DD is autistic and I drive an Automatic, we’ve been talking about this recently and think automatic would be best for her to learn in

Findlebarr · 30/06/2025 15:44

flawless234 · 30/06/2025 14:21

I’d love to hear from drivers who’ve only got an automatic licence and whether they ever felt restricted, disadvantaged, or regretted their choice. I haven’t come across anyone who’s said that. Obviously, people with a manual licence might think they’ve got the upper hand, but I reckon it’s just a mindset. In reality, they don’t have much of an edge, especially with how things are changing these days.

This is me! Auto only licence and I’ve never had any regrets at all. I’ve had no issues hiring a car for Euro/US holidays. I even hired an auto van when I moved. There has never been a moment when I’ve thought ‘if only I had a manual licence’.

Your DD is very young and will spend most of her adult life in a world where manual cars are vanishingly rare. It would already be apparent by now if she had a passion for racing vintage gull wings…

The only negative I have experienced is the fact that a surprising number of people seem to take my choice as a personal insult and can be surprisingly adamant that their way is much better 👀. They seem to find it annoying that I can zoom around in my car to my heart’s content without having proved myself worthy first.

None of the ‘pro-manual’ talking points actually hold much water and my opinion is that it’s a very outdated mindset.

Original poster
flawless234 · 30/06/2025 15:52

Findlebarr · 30/06/2025 15:44

This is me! Auto only licence and I’ve never had any regrets at all. I’ve had no issues hiring a car for Euro/US holidays. I even hired an auto van when I moved. There has never been a moment when I’ve thought ‘if only I had a manual licence’.

Your DD is very young and will spend most of her adult life in a world where manual cars are vanishingly rare. It would already be apparent by now if she had a passion for racing vintage gull wings…

The only negative I have experienced is the fact that a surprising number of people seem to take my choice as a personal insult and can be surprisingly adamant that their way is much better 👀. They seem to find it annoying that I can zoom around in my car to my heart’s content without having proved myself worthy first.

None of the ‘pro-manual’ talking points actually hold much water and my opinion is that it’s a very outdated mindset.

Show quote history

You totally hit the nail on the head with that answer!
Thanks for replying xx

OP posts:
OldLondonDad · 30/06/2025 15:55

It's fine, and probably pretty reasonable in 2025 (the car guy in me dies a little more as I say it...)

She could always upgrade to manual later, maybe at her expense, but it's highly likely she'll never need to or care to.

TizerorFizz · 30/06/2025 15:57

@Tangerinenets Were you insured to drive her car? Often people don’t think of this.

BettyEagleton · 30/06/2025 16:00

My son did automatic only and passed really quickly. I’ve got a friend who is a (manual) driving instructor and asked her advice beforehand. She also said should he want to join the police or whatever or need a a manual licence for any other reason in the future, it’s usually very straightforward to take the manual test once you can drive.