To be sorry I ever planned a road trip with teens

[Oceann]

We are on a summer road trip to California. Holiday of a lifetime but teens whinging about having to move around, DH whinging about teens whinging and I’m exhausted with all the organising .

AIBU to plan an all inclusive week next year as I am sick of the hassle and lack of gratitude !

So if it cost alot of money and there was lots of moaning what was so great about the experience? That they know they can unnecessarily endure painstakingly long journeys?

This is your problem, less than the teens. US road trip is our holidaq car fills me with dread.

We did California with our teens and had a fantastic trip despite some calamities along the way. BUT we had a car and listened to music and chatted. I strongly recommend you try and get a car for at least part of the trip. The USA is a nation of drivers, public transport is just a hassle.

I think a road trip without driving in California which has atrocious public transport was ambitious to say the least

Goodness, some people seem to be implying OP is taking her family on a gulag march, rather than a family holiday.
They are only travelling every 4th or 5th day, so it’s not that bad. I haven’t travelled on US public transport, but I have had experience of driving abroad as a not very confident driver and I think it’s unfair to force OP or her DH into that position if it’s something they are both uncomfortable with.

US public transport is not really fit for purpose except for the commuter metro areas of a few big cities.
Teens are likely to grumble but OP has given herself a challenging holiday.
It is a world away from a road trip where you have your own vehicle, personal space and flexibility. Which isn’t to say that teens wouldn’t complain sometimes anyway.

Oh that's not a road trip that's just constant travelling. Stop and rethink your plans, find a beach and stay there like the PP suggested.

Oh yeah.. Amtrack isn’t great and honestly you’re getting all the downsides of travel and none of the benefits. You are wasting a lot of time traveling by train, and I’m guessing the kids are bored.

Gather the troops and find out what you all really want to do with the remainder of your trip. Rent a car and find the biggest ball of twine (or whatever) at a roadside attraction or spend more time at your planned locations.

Omg, it’ll be great. I did those states as part of a longer road trip. Cannon Beach! Gorgeous

Really looking forward to it, the first trip we did was when our daughter was 9m old, in to LA then drove pretty much up the coast ending in Seattle, stunning place.
I hope things improve and you get to enjoy some of your holiday OP. This is your trip too and they need to show some appreciation for what you’ve arranged

It’s really not great. The trains here are slow. For example in my area I tried the train once to visit my hometown. It was an 10 hour trip vs. a 6 hour drive.

Unless you are going on a very scenic route there really isn’t much to see after awhile.

We did a road trip as a big holiday a few years back pre Covid. DC were 18 and 10. We had 4 nights in NY then picked up the hire car, drove to DC had 3 nights there, one night in Philly en route to Cape Cod, stayed a week, then 3 nights in the Berkshires (included a theme park) and 2 nights back in NY. Absolutely brilliant- but I wouldn’t have fancied doing it on the train.

At the next opportunity I'd sit everyone down together with a drink and have an honest conversation. It doesn't seem that this trip is ticking the boxes for you all - what do we need to do for the rest of the holiday so that everybody has a good/better time?

There may be some things you can't change (accommodation/tickets) but it shouldn't be impossible to review the plans for the rest of your time away and get things back on track.

Once the dust has settled I recommend you all read Sisters by Raina Telgemaier which is about this very subject & very funny.

Any holiday with teens was a nightmare for us! We stopped when the eldest reached 14 and went on our own - bliss!

Absolutely book that all inclusive next year. You sound like you deserve another holiday after this!

You were brave taking that trip on with teenagers. We took ours to Florida when they were teens and my eldest was 15. He moaned every bloody day as all he wanted to do was be in the villa on his phone talking to his mates. He was vile.

We did an AI in Ibiza the year after which they loved. I want too fussed.

Oh thank God it’s not just me !

Honestly @Oceann, there was one evening where we were walking along cocoa beach, dolphins jumping out of the ocean, absolutely beautiful, and he was still going on. I must admit I really lost it with him then.

We did a holiday of a lifetime in 2022; the kids moaned so much and yet they were all sat round discussing the holiday last night in terms of awe, how it was their best experience ever etc.

DH and I just looked at each other like

i personally wouldn’t do a road trip with teens. They’ll just do your head in. Have you considered a cruise with separate adjoining rooms?

They will moan in the UK too. You just notice it more as you are stuck together in vehicles.
Buy earplugs!
We took our teen girls to the Picasso museum last year in Barcelona as part of our trip and they moaaned about it . " Why are we here? " I ignored and enjoyed my visit.

Sorry that your lovely holiday is being ruined by moaning. Probably worse because they are together. I’m sorry to —boast— say that ds at 15 was a total joy on a California trip we took together and I don’t see any reason why a train/uber trip would be a problem.

I tend to just let moaning wash over me but what about a proper temper explosion? Tell them to pull their bloody fingers out and stop spreading bloody misery on a fucking dream holiday FGS.

And no I wouldn’t book an AI next year, I’d book the holiday I wanted and leave them behind with relatives.