To wonder what ‘living as a woman’ means?

[Stressmode]

I don’t think I ‘live as a woman’. I only wear men’s clothes, for work and at home. Don’t own makeup or any woman specific items. Hobbies are motorbikes and wood work. My job is in a traditionally male industry. I am the only woman on the team. I know I am genetically a woman. I have a womb and have given birth to a kid. My name is androgynous sounding. It is the name my parents picked for me.

Non of how I am is a sex thing, or an identity thing. I just like practicality and comfort.

I am constantly mistaken for a man. I get challenged about using womens toilets. I am nearly 6 foot tall. A lot of the time I enjoy male privilege. For example I can go running at night with worrying.

What does it mean to ‘live as a woman’? If I say I am a woman, is that enough? Why is it that men have to become a caricature of a woman to live as one?

Genuinely confused by this…

How are you living as a woman?

You are a woman. However you live is how a woman lives.

We all have different bodies and clothes and hair and interests and talents. We share our female biology. The rest is up to you.

Intrepidpanda doesn't share female biology, so is not living as a woman.

Approximately 32million women live in the UK, so there are at 32 million definitions of living as a woman right there.

Every life is unique, don't try to belittle this by putting them all in a box with a nice label and bow.

Have you also been seeing yourself as a panda?

I have a female friend and I don't think she looks male but she often gets called sir. I don't know why. She is tall and has short hair but looks female to me.

OP - it's social and cultural. Living as a woman according to some people is adhering to social expectations of female sex. It will vary depending on culture. To some extent you are part of it cos you say - wear men's clothes. Why not just say - I wear trousers or jeans or whatever. In your head somewhere you think some clothes are male and some are female. I think we all do it and when I am aware I try and challenge myself.

I recently bought a T shirt for my DS. It was in 'men's section ' and was vaguely pink. More browny pink but I thought I will buy it. Well it's not getting worn. I knew deep down culturally and socially someone would think that was a female colour and I bought it trying to rock the boat.

We expect males to do certain things and females to do certain things. If we are more inclined to do the things culture expects of the opposite sex it cause a little jolt.

If society was more relaxed about what the sexes do or wear or look like perhaps people would be more relaxed

It has nothing whatsoever to do with how you feel inside.

I'm totally relaxed about people wearing what they want, within the bounds of decency when out and about. But it doesn't make them something they're not.

Lola Young could answer aspects of this, if she read the SM comments. She dares to not fully cover up her less than perfect body. She dares to perform in public, even though she isn't model material. The comments, typically include how she smells and what state her genitals are in. We can't just be. We don't get to just go about our lives without being criticised for not being decorative, or entertaining (smile love/not talking?).

If you cut a dog's nuts off it doesn't magically become a bitch...

If society was more relaxed about what the sexes do or wear or look like perhaps people would be more relaxed.

This is exactly what gender critical means. Critical of gender stereotypes. Many women want to move away from those stereotypes because they are regressive and harmful to everyone but most especially to women.

The only way to live as a woman is to be born a human female and survive to adulthood.

living as a woman starts in childhood, norms and expectations, and day to day life experiences including menses breasts and growth spurts.
as an adult how you choose to express yourself is up to you, but the experience of growing up as a girl in this world starts at birth and forms and influences us. you just can't step into the role.

No idea what 'living as a woman' is meant to mean, but i agree that 99% of men dressing up as women either seem to go for the Margret Thatcher vibe or the 'prostitute touting for business at the kerb' look 🧐

As if that's what's normal ?

Women can be butch and men can be feminine, and everything in between.

I really admire camp men and masculine women who are comfortable in themselves, as the sex they are without feeling the need to change anything. Great role models for gender non confirming kids.

This is always the crucial and uncomfortable question isnt it.

Imagine how offensive it is to say 'Im living as a black person'. What the hell does that even mean, unless of course I pile in with a load of stereotypes about 'black people' (whatever that also means)

And in actual fact, race is not a linear, polarised biology within us, we arent one ethnicity or another within our DNA and chromosomes because we are a mixture of all our forebears.

That is not the same as sex, because there is only one or the other sex, you cant be a bit of this or a bit of that.

So I can call myself whatever ethnicity I like cant I? I can say Im living as a 'chinese person' and you cant challenge me on it. I just feel I am ok. Its just whats within me! Im being my true self.

It means living as a dated stereotype of a woman.

Interesting thread. Most of the time there’s no difference in how you live - men and women in this country could live similar lives or even interchangeable lives. The difference is physical, biological and hormonal and that’s it.

I read an article interviewing someone who identified as trans woman who wore dresses but kept a full beard and proclaimed that they were expanding the definition of what it means to be a woman. No! Why not frame it as expanding the definition of what it means to be a man?! Be a man who wears a dress, has a Rachel haircut and wears high heels. Why change the definition of women to include men rather than accepting you cannot change biology but you can wear, act and be called whatever you want. Is it so bad to be a "feminine" man that it's preferable to rewrite biology.

🔺️Misogyny 🔺️

There are as many ways of “living as a woman” as there are adult human females on planet Earth, which is around 4 billion.

A man can’t “live as a woman” even if he emulated the life, behaviour, speech and clothing style of every single one of these 4 billion women. It’s impossible - because a man is not a woman and can never become a woman.

Doesn't everyone know it's lippy, high heels, passing Tampax to the lady next cubicle in the loo and pillow fights whilst wearing underwear?

I’m also nearly six feet tall and there is no way I ‘enjoy male privilege’. It’s very obvious from my body shape and the way that I move that I am female. And have endured the street harassment and catcalling in accordance with that perception.

You get challenged about using women’s toilets?

Some good responses here.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5357452-living-as-a-woman?page=1

What would be the point? Neither the good nor the bad parts can be identified into.