Is gardening outdated

[BulbsAndLampsDiffer]

I live on an estate, on my road I am generally surrounded by couples/ single mums in their 30s and 40s. I am single mum try to maintain my garden both front and rear, paining fences, mowing the lawn and general weeding, so very cheap and easy. However when looking around I feel like the only one to be doing do with lots of weeds on driveways and un mown front gardens. I know it’s not a priority in modern busy life.
For convex some one said to me years ago it is impossible to have a tidy home, tidy child and tidy mum. And I do let myself slip in order to keep my home and child looking put together.
No judgment just curious if where I live is the norm.
YABU too busy to pull up weeds
YANBU pride in your garden

With little rain at the minute you'll struggle

If you cut the grass don't clear up the cuttings for the moment

Till the autumn/rains come then all will be good

And get a ring doorbell!

Thing is, with all the focus on mental health, gardening is really good for that.

10 minutes a day outside pottering makes all the difference

My friend left her lawn to dandelions

It looked really pretty!

In summer my husband literally spends all day everyday doing the garden which pisses me off immensely because I get left to do everything in the house

You've just described a normal life, which involves balancing a variety of tasks though. Maybe garden instead of typing replies telling others how busy you are? 10 mins a day would make a difference.

Swap?

Weeds between slabs ... just put salt on them.

The grass clippings dry up, shrink and sink in pretty quickly. I never clear up our lawn clippings (when I do bother to mow, mostly a patch to picnic on) and we’ve never tracked grass into the house or not been able to sit down except perhaps in the immediate couple of hours afterwards.

@Girliefriendlikespuppies - that dual colour rose is lovely! Sort of paint splashed, in a good way. What’s it called?

You’ll find a lot of unmown lawns in June and beyond through summer , following ’No Mow May.’ Ours is currently unmown and I love gardening. Much better for wildlife like this. So to answer your question … yes, mowing is outdated…

but I don’t for a moment think every unmown lawn near you is a result of what I described but the answer to your question is going to be so much more nuanced. Gardening is cheap and easy, as you say, but also time consuming and never ending.

I inherited a garden last year! And never thought I would, but I love it!

It makes me so happy when new blooms grow. Finding out what all the plants are has been really fun and exciting. I went to a garden centre and bought new plants!

It's genuinely helping my MH.

I disagree, not everyone has the luxury of prioritising the things they enjoy because they have to prioritise things like food, shelter, and raising children. Just working enough to pay the bills and keeping on top of the basic day to day running a house can be all consuming. I also love pottering in my garden. I don’t have the time. A lot of working parents don’t have time for things they enjoy. That’s the point I’m making.

Also o can’t do your poll because pride in my garden means not pulling up most wildflowers ( that you call
weeds )

@ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine Yes! I LOVE gardening, baking, patchwork, reading and writing in equal measure (oh god I sound like a tradwife); if I won the lottery I could quit work and do those things. But the only way to prioritise them all would be to deprioritise my children’s care to neglect levels, or to not sleep. I do prioritise the garden at times but only at the expense of something else – it can feel like whack-a-mole. Gardens going great but, whoops, laundry’s piling up! Switch to laundry and sorting out the house but, whoops, haven’t washed my face in 500 years! Prioritise self-care and something else falls apart. Next thing you know, the weeds are waist-high or you’ve missed the chance to plant bulbs for another year in a row. Would love to potter in the garden in the evening – I created the garden from nothing that way, lifting pavers and turfing and planting by moonlight! – but I’m usually too dead on my feet.

Oh this is stunning! Id love something along these lines when I finally get around to it

Also! Having a herb garden is making me eat better! Although often involves lots of butter, cream and olive oil! Delicious sauces and dips! Sage butter potatoes are incredible 😆

I plan on growing veg, and I've bought fruit trees (don't order from gardening express, it's not quite a scam, but I've been waiting 4 weeks for dispatch now).

My friends all think I've gone mad 😆 and I have a little haha

You can post on MN whilst doing other things such as cooking, breastfeeding, sitting in a Dr's waiting room, watching two toddlers. Etc etc etc.
Gardening is pretty much very hands on.
So yes it is only "10 minutes" but those 10 minutes are focused and physical. I wouldn't sneer at someone for not having the time &/or physical energy.

I love my garden, but understand not everyone does. However - the uncontrolled hedges spilling out on the footpath really piss me off.

I'd take an unmanicured garden any day over what our new neighbours did - they ripped everything out and flagged the whole thing with a tiny patch of astro turf. It looks souless but personal preference obvs. BUT its so antisocial and noisy as there's nothing soft to absorb the noise, nothing to stop balls banging on the fences and pinging over as they bounce much higher on paving than in grass. Yes there's less grass cutting for them but he's out there jet washing it for hours... seems to take far longer than it would to flick round with the mower. It's weird when they're out there, like an empty room all echo and loud.

I'm not sneering either. 🫣

I love gardening, but choose plants to fit in with my lifestyle and what I need. So that’s lots of spring bulbs for colour and cut flowers (zero maintenance required), and frost and drought tolerant plants that require just one chop a year.

Where I currently live, I have just a couple of balconies, and once I’d planted some pots up, the difference it made was huge. Just sitting outside amidst the greenery is so good for one’s mental health. Picking dill, lettuce, rocket and strawberries for my salads is so nice.

Nothing gives me more pleasure than seeing bees and other pollinators buzzing around my flowers.

Gardening needn’t be expensive. All this year’s flowers and veg are grown from seed, collected from last year's plants. My tomato plants come from seeds from the tomatoes I prepare for salads …. I drain them into sink water which I use to water my pots, and up they spring. Bulbs come back each year, and multiply.

We're the house with the messy front garden. Pretty much everyone else's looks tidy, though many of them are paved for parking on.

A number of issues -

We do no mow May, which this year has turned into half mow June. We've all been ill with something that has really dragged on, I suspect COVID at this point. Just getting more petrol for the lawn mower felt like an insurmountable task.

When I do try and garden I find wildlife I don't want to disturb - slow worms, frogs and toads, bumble bee nests.

Between work, trying to keep on top of house stuff and caring for DS - including ongoing fights to get him the support he needs, he's autistic and really struggling with his mental health right now - I'm exhausted. If I get spare time I tend to try and catch up on sleep or have a shower and wash my hair. I also have some minor but annoying health issues I need to do something about, but DS is my priority right now.

Oh you absolutely were. Ten mins Mumsnetting while I cook the kids breakfast or similar does not mean I have time to change into old clothes, go out, unlock the shed, get everything out, traipse back forth round the house to the wheelie bin, put everything away again etc. I'm not lazy, idle or somehow letting the neighbourhood down if I choose to prioritize the inside of my home. It's not a jungle ..the one thing I DO stay on top of is pruning the overhanging branches that go over the fence to the pavement. If weeds growing through gravel offends people they are welcome to step on and remove them.

I have limited time and prioritise my home and all I need to do to keep on top of it. The garden is just another bloody thing to do but I'm too proud to let it slip too much. My mum and my husband plant and tidy and I water. If we upsize I would honestly consider a gardener money well spent- I hate it that much. I love the results though, haha.

Oh, I absolutely wasn't. 🫣