I don't feel listened to sometimes.

[londongirloftwo]

My husband and I agreed not to give £200 to our daughter for her taxi and even after it was agreed she would cover it he paid it anyway.

I have backed down on a desk I would prefer not to have, the current one is good, he has insisted we get the desk. Did it in front of my daughter saying I could get you a nice desk too but Mum won't let me. I didn't want an argument so I agreed with it.

Am I being unreasonable? Am I making too big a deal of it.

I suspect he has ADHD, lots of our family are neurodivergent. Is this linked to it?

I feel he doesn't listen to my perspective or will plough ahead with what he would like anyway.

He is also a great Dad, provides for us well, we both work and contribute a lot around the home.

It’s tricky with those two examples because they’re more about parenting than money and partly depends on DD age. Sounds like your DD wanted the new desk so what was your reasoning, just that you preferred the old desk? Was DD capable of paying for the taxi? Was it profligate of her to run up that bill or unavoidable? Both examples sound like he’s soft on DD so indulges her rather than listening to you, but if she’s a nice kid not a nightmare and you can cover the costs as a family without being strapped then I’d indulge her too. Are there lots more other examples that don’t involve DD? I think if he’s earning well there’s a point where he wants to spend on nice stuff without being told he can’t, is how I’d feel. But different if it’s leaving you too skint for bills.

Though he shouldn’t agree one thing then do another but maybe it’s when she’s then in the mix that his resolve crumbles.

Thank you.