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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Tips for cohabiting in harmony

2 replies

ellie09 · 25/06/2025 15:03

Hi all

So me and fiance have moved in together a week ago, and I am finding it all a bit overwhelming at the moment.

Maybe I just need more time to settle into the new norm?

I have been married before (now divorced) and was with him for 8 years. Also cohabited before with another partner for around a year.

Been with current partner around 3 years now. I have a DS from previous marriage. I have a Rottweiler and he has 2 cats.

Things that have overwhelmed/bugged me:

  • Not having the TV to myself! Yes, a bit selfish. We have a TV in our room, but I miss spreading out on the sofa watching shows I want to watch. DP has his hobbies etc too so I didnt think it would be an issue, but he seems to be hanging around me every evening.
  • I WFH 3 days out of 5, and he works remotely all week. I find being in the house all day, every day very overwhelming with us both and our pets. I am considering going into the office more because of this.
  • The cats are currently upstairs whilst dogs/cats get used to each other, but I am struggling with the cats jumping up and sleeping in the bed at night, running around etc. He happily lies with them tucked up to him, but I struggle to settle. We can't keep them out atm as it would be cruel to limit their space.

I am not sure if its because I lived alone most of the time with my dog and DS for 5+ years which is why I am struggling a bit, and maybe I just need some.more time to adjust to the new normal?

Any tips or advice on what works would be great - especially if you both WFH etc

OP posts:
Poopeepoopee · 25/06/2025 15:11

I guess I'd start by asking why you decided to live together? What was your reason?

Shoth · 25/06/2025 15:32

What’s the house set up? Where are you working. It sounds like you could benefit with 2 dedicated work spaces, where you aren’t interrupted.

him wanting to be around you in the evening just sounds like early days excitement and I’m sure will calm down when you get your rhythm

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