Could my parents have sued my primary school for outing disabilities?

[lilacbreeze]

Edit: I do not plan on suing them lol! I am just curious if this was normal.

Somewhat lighthearted. I was diagnosed with epilepsy when I was about 3. I was on and off medication but I never had a fit at school. When I went to primary school, I was clearly the only one who had epilepsy as my photo was stuck up in the staffroom (with my name written below it in capital letters) and a photo of me on a lanyard hanging up in the classroom along with a boy in the class below who was known to have loads of allergies. I didn’t know this was going to be a thing.

kids were very occasionally in the staffroom (we made pancakes there once) and obviously when we were in people did ask me but I played dumb. The boy who had allergies didn’t have his photo up there afai recall.

The school cook also told her daughter ( who was in my class) I was epileptic as she naturally asked why my photo was on the lanyard in class and the daughter told several people I had epilepsy/epileptic fits (not in front of me). My friend was one of these people and she asked if it was true but I was embarassed so I said no.

i also remember a younger boy about 4 years below me was diagnosed with autism and the teachers came round the classes telling us to mind ourselves around him because he’s autistic. And explained what that meant. They never did this about my epilepsy (to my knowledge) or the boy with allergies.

not sure I found out how the boy had allergies presumably someone in my class told me but unsure if they found out or asked about his photo too.

as a 30 year old I am no longer ashamed of my epilepsy (and was later diagnosed w autism) but it seems very odd looking back.

this was from about 1999-2006. I didn’t go to a special needs school. My parents never said anything to the school but im not sure they knew till I told them after I left.

That's quite common I believe.
My daughters primary had lunch lanyards that those with allergies/dietary needs that they put on at lunch time.
There was a poster with pictures and information of these children stuck on the wall by the food hatch (I saw it while at a school event).
Generally disabilities etc shouldn't need to be a secret. Children are very accepting and understanding (more than some adults) and don't care if Child A has this and Child B has that.
My daughters class had children with severe allergies, asthma, autism and one with a very specific medical issue that required medication several times a day.
I used to help on school trips. The medical bag was absolutely massive.

I get that. I just don’t think it’s fair to point out to the kids oh that’s the epileptic girl. It felt isolating. It would’ve been good for some discretion and teaching it to us all.

I see. This was one lanyard stuck on the school wall on a hook that was never removed afaik. Interesting they wear lanyards now. I suppose if lots of them do it it wouldn’t feel as isolating.

Obviously it was totally inappropriate for the cook to tell her daughter. But having your pictures up for staff who didn't routinely work with the children with life threatening conditions, so they can know who may need what emergency treatment? That was probably proportionate, particularly for the time.

I think attitudes and approaches to privacy and confidentiality were just different. It was common knowledge which of our classmates had health conditions and disabilities, and I suspect that the teachers told us because they were a) e.g. ensuring everyone was aware that Lucy was diabetic and if she began behaving a particular way it might be a low blood sugar and we could get her help or b) trying to be inclusive by trying to encourage everybody to understand what it was like for Shelley who was hearing impaired, or for Andrew who had autism and wasn’t just “weird.”

Your parents wouldn’t really have gotten very far with “suing” anyone. If they’d wanted to they could have addressed it with the school and received an apology for you and a review of approach, but litigation over this sort of thing would have been unlikely to succeed.

To be honest I don't think other children knowing you were epileptic would be allowed now, unless it was done with your permission. However it makes sense that everyone, including children, knew for your safety. I was epileptic and made a point of telling my classmates in case I ever had a seizure without a teacher present.

All of this was designed to help you and to keep you safe.

Wanting a dinner lady sacked for telling her daughter... well, I wouldn't.

my regular seizures weren’t tonic clonic and visible to people although I get this. I think it would be nice to teach it to the whole class. I thought the dinner lady was breaching confidentiality at the time telling her daughter (who picked on me at the best of times) without consent.

I thought dinner lady telling someone without consent, who then told everyone else, without consent, was inappropriate. The girl was quite unkind to me at the best of times. I still think telling a child when none of the other kids know and they haven’t got consent is and was wrong.

I would never tell my children private medical info about a child

i completely understand why staff had to know

Children weren’t told as a group by a teacher with approval from my parents. One dinner lady told her child, who told the other kids. My parents were shocked when they found out.

The thing was, the teacher didn’t tell the whole class with permission. It was done without consent by a dinner lady.

i understand attitudes were different in 06

Yes it was very normal and in fact was considered necessary. I’ve been a teacher since 1990. In every school I worked in up until quite recently any child who had a potential life threatening condition such as epilepsy, serious allergy, asthma etc would have their photo up in class and in the staffroom. It tends not to be as common now due to GDPR, but you can guarantee that somewhere in the school staffroom and student’s class the info will be up on the back of a cupboard door or in an easily accessible folder.

For a lighthearted post this really couldn't sound less lighthearted. I really don't think any of it sounds like a big deal.

I understand. Would a lunchtime superviser have been told off for telling her daughter without consent? Or would schools just brush it under the rug?

@lilacbreeze I agree the dinner lady shouldn't have told her daughter directly but she may have assumed her daughter knew already.
There was a boy in my class at primary that had epilepsy and I can remember him having seizures a few times and when that happened the class would all go into the next classroom or the hall while he was helped.
I vaguely remember us just doing this in a calm manner so I assume at some point we were told and taught what to do.
(that was in the 1980s)

That’s fair enough

Why? What if you were playing with your friends in the playground and had a seizure? Your friends knowing about your epilepsy could be the difference between life and death. As someone who’s sister died as a result of a seizure, I know that knowledge of such conditions is vital.

I always kept my seizures private :( never told the teachers

I must caveat this with the fact my seizures weren’t tonic clonic

Why the secrecy ? Would your parents not want people, including classmates, to know in case you needed help ?

I didn’t have tonic clonic seizures. Mild focal ones.

i told my friends privately on my own terms

why would it need to be such a secret

what a completely bizarre post and odd way of looking at how you were kept safe.

completely weird

Even today, schools run the risk that staff (many of whom necessarily need to know about a child’s health conditions) may tell other people. Staff are trained about confidentiality and it would be a disciplinary matter for the individual staff member; but suing the school because a staff member told their child about it still isn’t a realistic outcome.

I don't know, but I do remember the class teacher announcing in front of the whole class that I was the only one on free school dinners 😂

This was about 1980 mind you.

It's a shame you seem to have felt so sensitive/stigmatised about a medical condition. It does raise interesting discussion about consent and the sharing of information which is valid. I still find jumping to thinking someone should have lost their job is rather unpleasant.

I agree with you that there's a difference between telling a class of children with parents permission and using it as an educating moment and a dinner lady telling her child who then gossiped about it with other children.

My son had cancer and school only told people with my permission, including the children and parents. They wouldn't have told them if I had said no.