Hi all,
Opinions needed please!
There is one particular mum that is targeting and bullying my child.
For context, this woman used to work at my DS secondary school as a TA, her child and my child are friends, she was dismissed from her job due to misconduct, not sure exactly why but believe it was due to how she spoke to, and dealt with children. I had warned the school about her behaviour previously as she had lied about incidents that happened between students and herself to avoid getting in trouble.
On one occasion she told my DS “don’t chat to me” as she was annoyed with him for mentioning her name regarding an incident that had happened, where he was in trouble, and needed her version to support his.
I know she was fired because the school called me and asked if HR could use the aforementioned to support her dismissal. Due to my DS and her DS being friends I declined, as I didn’t want friction between them nor did I feel comfortable being the nail in the coffin for her job! Kicking myself for not doing it now.
Anyway, fast forward to recently, this woman has now signed up her DS to my son’s football team, who he’s been with for some years. I am now dealing with the following:
- refusing to clap my child at award ceremony, I watched her look at her husband shake her head, mouth “nope” and cross her arms
- never clapping goals, saying well done or being supportive. This woman claps, and is very supportive to every other child
- Targeting my DS when all the children are not listening to the coach
- The regular football coach had organised a professional coach to train the team for one session and told my DS “I know you’re going to be the rude one when this coach comes next week”
I have spoken to the Child Welfare Officer about her comments and behaviour, it will be monitored moving forward but this was before the award ceremony and her behaviour wasn’t picked up on. I was told that they too were concerned she was being a bit strong regarding my DS, and her excuse is always “I know what he’s like, I worked with him at the school”. Feels very much like my son is being condemned!
I have also been told by other parents that she calls my son names such as “little sht and “rude little bstard”. This is usually after he’s been to a friends house and the parents have been surprised at how polite he was, which is the opposite of how this woman has portrayed him.
My current and probably most significant gripe happened last night, my DS attended a birthday party in a social club, parents could attend too, and she was there. Another child who was not invited was hanging around outside with a group of friends, causing a bit of trouble. At some point in the midst of everything my DS was called a “Ngga” by this child. Unfortunately, this is this boys go to word and wouldn’t be the first time he’s used it!
The woman shouts at the children who were at the party to “get in the f-ing party” and then asks my DS what he said to him.
After finding out she tells my son that he “isn’t even black and can’t be offended by the word ngger (yes, she said it with a hard R) as he was white washed”
The woman in question is black, but my child also considers himself black. As the above is regarding my child ‘not being black enough’ for her, to give you an idea of complexion of my DS (not that it matters), he is of a similar complexion to Aaron Pierre.
I am pretty much at the end of my tether with this woman and I don’t know what the best thing would be to do moving forward. I do have her number but I don’t want to message her as it gives her exactly what she wants, a reaction and gossip.
Would this even be considered as bullying?
TIA