Now expected to walk my bosses dog at lunch.

[Rose785]

My boss started bringing her dog in maybe once a week. She works through lunch so she can leave work an hour early. I like to walk at lunch time. She asked if I could walk her dog and I genuinely didnt mind to begin with. But now she's bringing her dog in 3 or 4 times a week and now just expects me to walk her dog on my lunch break. I am a very busy mum so my only time to get my steps in is during my lunch and I find the dog annoys me by constantly stopping to sniff and slowing down my pace as well as picking up the poo which isnt my own dog is unpleasant!!! I finally said no when my boss asked me the other day and she was like oh please just a quick one! And it's now just irritating me that I have to walk her dog on my lunch when I just want to be on my own and decompress from being a busy working mum. it's getting to the point where I am thinking of possible ways and lies of getting out of it.
AIBU to feel this way. And if not any advise. It is my boss and I love my job but it's getting to me now.

Absolutely not!

And then to boot, she’s getting to go home an hour early!

You need to say, no, this is my free time.

So the other way to deal with it is not walk for a few days become 'unreliable as a dog walker', no I'm working lunch today, need home sharp.

This is a one-sided arrangement and she doesn't care whether you are happy or not. She has other options but won't change the arrangement until you make her. At the moment the easiest and best option for her is for you to give up your lunch hour so that she leaves early. This is not the only option, it's just her preferred one. Subtle hints won't work here. You'll have to be assertive. The thing about doing so is that it's never as bad as you expect and you'll feel some self-respect just by standing up for yourself. You can do it.
Be clear: it doesn't suit you to walk the dog so she'll need to do so herself.

The trick is not to wait for her to ask.
Get your information in to her before she has a chance to assume and ask.

When she walks in tomorrow say ….good morning …oh I just need to tell you first thing that I’m busy at lunch times for the forseeable so won’t be able to walk your dog any more, please make sure you have other arrangements in place for him, thanks.
Good luck OP, you can do it.

Why can’t she walk her dog in her lunch break ?

Someone that self-entitled as that boss will see 'want to go to the shop' as 'going for a walk of course I can take your dog'

I would also tell her you have errands to run/shops to go into so won’t be able to do it anymore. I’m a people pleaser as well so I’d just make excuses until she stops asking 😂

I’m a people pleaser as well so I’d just make excuses until she stops asking

So called people pleasers are extremely annoying. Just be direct!

I think the manager is an idiot here but generally speaking think if you ask a favour of someone it’s daft if they just make an excuse instead of saying no.

There is nothing wrong with being a people pleaser but just remember your boundaries.

Most dog owners are loathed to have their dogs tied up outside shops these days.
And dogs (except guide dogs) shouldn't be taken into shops

What do you mean by she is asking the dog to ask you? Is she just sending him over to you with the lead at lunchtime?
Could you not just ignore him and then dissappear 2 minutes early when she is not looking? Pop to the loo, and then go out of the building instead?

As in the dog jumps up at her around lunch time and she's like don't ask me it's rose you need to go and ask! I don't think I actually want to walk the dog at all anymore now that it's become an expectation. I think I just need to have a private chat and say that I don't want to do it anymore

So she’s taking up your lunchtime so she can work through hers and go home early? Cheeky bitch (her, not the dog) No, no and no again.

I think you need to just be honest and say what you wrote in your opening post. Including telling her that when you first said “yes” you thought it would be just a one off or on a rare occasion after that, but the ever increasing frequency and expectation to walk her dog doesn’t work for you and actually it’s intruding on your free time.

You should start talking to her through the dog too.

"Tell boss you're her dog and she's the one who needs to walk you".

Or "I can't walk you, it's my break, for me to relax. Boss can walk you when she finishes early".

P/A but might work.

Oh, that is so annoying. When she says that you could say to the dog, with a smile, 'no, you're mommy's responsibility, not mine, I'm going for peaceful, poo free, walk' and then just go out, leaving the dog behind.
Easier said than done though, I know!

I think you might need to put your big girl pants on and say something like “boss, I’ll take the dog today because she’s here and needs a walk but I don’t really enjoy walking your dog so this will be the last one.” That way you’re not leaving the dog unwalked when it needs to go out and you’ve set the expectation she makes a different plan for the rest of the week. (Dog walkers exist.)

I think when she says to her dog that the dog needs to ask Rose, I’d say in a matching ‘talking to the dog’ voice “sorry Fido! I’m off out and you’re NFI! See you all after lunch”. Break the pattern with the energy she gives you.

And you reply

if rose wanted to walk a dog every day rose would own a dog

you are the owner. You walk your dog

How bloody ridiculous. She can't face asking you herself so is pretending to get the dog to ask you! I'd just say "Sorry (dog's name), tell your mummy I can't walk you any more"

There’s no way in hell I’d be walking my bosses dog on my unpaid lunch break never mind picking up it’s shit. Ur boss is taking you for a ride !

“Just so you know, I’ve documented every dog walk and poo pick up. If you ask me again, it’s being sent to HR and every executive in Head Office with the headline “Not in my Job Description.”

@Rose785 ahh sorry you're having to deal with this!! I think I totally get what you mean about the situation slowly evolving to a point that's hard to come back from and how hard it is to "suddenly" say no! Do you think you could preemptively drop by her office one day and say something like "Hi, just wanted to mention that I won't be available to walk (Dog) on my lunch break tomorrow! Hope this helps in case you need to make other plans for her!"

If your boss presses the issue you could then say something like "I just need some alone time to decompress on my break" or a light "I'm not very good company for (Dog) today, I can barely look after myself until I've had a proper break! tinkly laugh"

As a fellow non-confrontational person, these types of phrases have worked for me before 😁 just know that you've already been incredibly kind and done way more than you ever should have had to in the first place, and your boss has gotten too comfortable and needs a nudge to come back to their senses!

Hope you're able to come to a solution in the end x

@tommyhoundmum Of course there is something wrong with being a people pleaser, that post I was quoting and the topic of this whole thread is evidence of it.

It’s not a healthy mindset and does not serve anyone well in the long term and almost inevitably leads to resentment .

https://psychcentral.com/health/the-need-to-please-the-psychology-of-people-pleasing#definition

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/basics/people-pleasing/amp

Hang on. Just say you're happy to walk the dog as long as it's not on your time as you have things to do. Then you get a 2 hour break.