AMA I had plastic surgery

[RubyOrEmerald]

Just as the title says😊 might be an incredibly boring one haha but just thought I’d give it a go in case anyone had any questions on the topic!

*editing to say sorry, I only realised after posting that I accidentally posted in AIBU instead of AMA, trying to work out how to get it moved over sorry!

Yeah it’s such a personal decision and what’s right for one person won’t be right for another! X

I had a fringe for a long time but it was always so sweaty (oily skin) so I had already grown it out! X

What did people you know say/think about it? Did you get bullied or was it just a personal insecurity?

@RubyOrEmerald it sounds like it would be painful as the skin is so thin. Ouch! But that's behind you now.

Has it made you consider anything else? I always wonder if one surgery eventually leads to another.

I didnt really get bullied about it, a few small comments by people but nothing significant at all

what annoyed me most of all was people’s reaction to it when I was growing up. It was disproportionately huge (just for a bit of context- if the average size of a forehead is 6cm then mine was 10cm.. those are just made up numbers but just so it makes sense for how much bigger mine was compared to normal. It wasn’t something that someone might consider big and someone might consider normal, it was objectively big) but yeah people would bend over backwards to tell me it was fine and it didn’t look big at all because they knew I was self conscious. I could see it in their eyes that they were desperately trying to think of things to say to help me (‘ no it doesn’t look thaaaat big at all!’ , ‘Look it’s the same size as mine’ when actually it’s very obviously 4cm bigger , or ‘don’t worry, rihanna has a big forehead and look how pretty she is!’

When really, if they had been honest it would have been easier to get help. For example, does it look bigger with this hairstyle or does this help it look smaller? People saying it’s fine just the way it is didn’t help at all because I couldn’t get any honest help or advice

Tbf @RubyOrEmerald other people don't tend to notice things anywhere near as much. I have a friend who
disliked her thin lips. Yes her lips were thin but she was still very attractive and it's not something I saw when I looked at her if that makes sense.

I was worried about that too- and it felt like EVERYONE tried to put me off it by saying I would become addicted to getting plastic surgery and I’d want every little imperfection fixed

but I didn’t, I just had this procedure and that’s it. yeah sure we all get insecurities and things we’d like to change but personally for me it I would never get anything else fixed or changed. Theres nothing else about myself I dislike enough to go through all of that for. I don’t even dye my hair and barely wear make up and I couldn’t care less about my appearance being perfect or not x

my friend never wore red lipstick as she said it made them even thinner but she looks amazing in red lipstick colouring wise and she has great teeth.

I would like a tummy tuck post dc but then wonder if I would want something else because the initial fear is gone if that makes sense.

How young are you? Foreheads look bigger as we age due to receding hair and volume
loss. Do you worry about that or will it make
little difference?

Oh yeah that’s 100% true and I totally agree but honestly, even my dog could have identified that I had a big forehead. It was easily double the size of a normal and the worst part was that I could see it in their eyes that they were doing mental gymnastics to try and reassure me that it was absolutely fine and not big at all. After my surgery they’re all like yeah it looks much better because it was very big before. To be fair though it was completely well intentioned because they didn’t want to upset me x

A young relative of mine had this done last year. She had a high forehead and was insecure about it all her teen and young adult life. Wore a fringe but hated having to keep styling it and it would blow everywhere anyway. Since the surgery she's grown out the fringe and her confidence had grown massively. Brilliant surgeon in Harley Street and you can barely see the scar on the very edge of her hairline.

It’s funny because I have a list of insecurities and things I’d like to change (as most of us do!) and yet I would never ever think to get plastic surgery on anything else. But my forehead insecurity was much bigger than that and objectively it was really, really big. Since getting it done I feel like a completely new person.

I am glad it is a success and has transformed the way you see yourself. Like you I have physical attributes I would like improved but I was self-conscious about my eye bags (genetic) to the point I would prefer not to look into a mirror or pass a glass reflection on the street. If I saw myself, I would see the eye bags and slightly shudder inwards. Same with photos. I think I looked tired and people did ask if I was tired so reinforcing it.

Anyway I got it fixed 10 years ago with a lower blepharoplasty. The effect was subtle. DH said he did not notice but the change in the perception of myself was tremendous. I no longer fixated on that feature. It was like a load was lifted from my shoulders in everyday life.

I know what you mean about being a new person.

Obviously some people have questions because they’re asking them so move along if you’re not interested!

Im very sceptical about the agenda of a lot of posters on MN who appear to be trying to normalise cosmetic and surgical interventions to alter women's looks.

It's quite disturbing on MN how posters try and present the abnormal as normal.

So that is why I'm dubious about your thread which is pushing the agenda that if a woman isn't happy with her looks then the next step is surgical intervention.

Oh ok, well you do you 😊

personally I’m of the opinion that as long as educated and informed of all risks and benefits, as a woman I’m more than capable of making my own decision. And since it’s my body, it’s completely my choice what to do with it. I think that’s the freedom of choice all women should have. You might not have wanted the surgery if you were me, and hey that’s absolutely fine. But I personally did. And that’s also fine. That’s the great thing about freedom of personal choice.

i don’t like any piercings tbh, nothing wrong with them, but just not for me. But im not about to start dictating whether people can or can’t get piercings. As long as informed of the risks then it’s your choice. Same with tattooes. Or hair dying. Or lip plumping. Or make up tbh. Personally I can’t think of anything worse than getting up early to put make up on. But that’s fine for me. And if you do want to put make up on, that’s also fine!

but like I said, you do you!

and also, there is absolutely no agenda here, other than the one being created by you👍🏼

You summed it up perfectly tbh! It’s deeper than a normal insecurity, and it’s frankly exhausting to live with. I’m so pleased you got the outcome you wanted 😊

Honestly until you said Harley street I was like hey is this my family? Haha. So pleased for your relative x

Yeah that’s definitely something I considered, especially as I have quite thin hair naturally. I guess if my hair thins out more and makes it looks bigger as I get older than that’s just life and nothing I can do about it but hoping that doesn’t happen! Im late 20s x

Yeah I’m the same. I’d personally never get anything like that (nothing wrong with it, just not for me at all) and I’d be completely terrified to do it! I think I’d also be scared of becoming addicted if I had something like that- eg my forehead was different because that was NOT a normal mundane insecurity it was much deeper than that. But if I started fixing all the small mundane insecurities I’ve got then I’d be worried about getting addicted and looking for perfection that will never be achievable if you see what i mean x

@Everyoneseemssadnow so are you against botox, fillers and skin peels? What about using Tret and other skin care? Braces and dental cosmetic work? Make up?

Would be interested to know where you draw the line. I assume you do none of the above.

You do realise you yourself have an agenda.

Years ago I wrote to a surgeon to ask about the exact opposite! My forehead is small and I wanted a wider, higher one. He wrote me a lovely polite letter explaining that no such surgery exists and advised me to embrace what nature gave me.😅How times have changed. And I bet such a surgery DOES exist now. I'm pleased you're happy with the result, OP.

Aww I'm glad it made you happy OP! I have a long face and a huge forehead, which looks even taller because my face is narrow. I have always had to have a big fringe and I'm still paranoid when the wind blows! I can totally understand how you feel.

I also had to have a deviated septum corrected, NHS were fab but alas for me all the correction is done inside so my nose is still wonky. I used to have people ask me when I was a child how I broke my nose, it's that obvious. Unfortunately I just inherited rubbish genes!

I'm sorry but I dont know what " Tret" is. I've never heard of it.

Of the other things you mention I'm certainly not against braces - as far as I'm aware they are a long established treatment for dental abormalities.

I certainly use skin care products- cleansers , toners, moisturisers, serums etc as part of a skin care regime. And use makeup, albeit minimal makeup.

The line i draw is injecting chemicals into my body and having a surgeon's knife make unnecessary modifications to my body.. I would never ever even consider fillers, botox or surgery to alter my appearance.

If I have an agenda it is to try and present the view that women don't NEED to inject chemicals into their body.They don't NEED to have cosmetic surgery i.e I want to represent the alternative view point to that which is often touted on MN: that being a plastic clone is what women should be striving to achieve

Because some people may be interested in the type of surgery and be able to ask questions to the OP who has kindly offered to share her experience. It's an unusual surgery on the scale of cosmetic surgeries to actually have. And you are just being a complete cow with your comment.