Am I overreacting?!!

[Sunshineandbabies]

DP finished work early yesterday, whilst our youngest was asleep in their basket/bed I went to put our toddler down for a nap. I went back into the front room about ten minutes later and he was watching porn on his phone…..
I’ve no problem with that it’s just the fact that it’s 1.30 in the afternoon, I’ve ferried around grabbing him lunch and sorting out the kids and I walk into that 🤷🏽‍♀️ You couldn’t wait til I got our toddler off to nap?!
I don’t know why I feel so annoyed!

Yeah, I'd be quite annoyed if I was bustling around the house doing family things while my partner was rubbing one out on the couch.

You aren't staff.

Surely everyone knows it's only allowed after 3pm

It's 3pm somewhere. 🤷‍♀️😉

Why are you surprised about this?

You are happy for him to get off on watching other women being assaulted, violated and exploited so long as its not when your baby is in the room?

Actualky it sounds like your children have a porn addict for a Dad if he no longer cares where he watches it.

LOL

You're either ok with it or you're not.
If you wanted him to put DC down for a nap you should've asked him to, but assuming you didn't, then what's the problem if he was just going to be sat there on his phone anyway and you're fine with him watching porn?

Porn addiction

Please explain what you find funny:
there is nothing amusing about the horrendous porn industry.

What is funny about this disgusting porn addled man sitting getting off in the same room as his little children?

There's nothing wrong with what consenting adults do on film, and if you think that the entire industry consists of women being "assaulted, violated and exploited", all that tells me is that you know very little about it.

I didn't make any comment/give any opinion about this person watching it in the same room as his children, please don't put words in my mouth.

What do you mean " consenting adults " on film? You surely know that many of the women in the porn industry are not " consenting adults" ?

The majority of porn depicts and normalises violence perpetrated against women. You think there is " nothing wrong" with that?

Porn users need to progress to more and more extreme porn to get off on it.

It desensitises the user and makes them incapable of having a normal relationship.

If OP 's partner watches porn in front of his children he is already well down the route of no longer being able to judge what normal behaviour is.

I really don’t know where you get the idea that watching porn densities you and renders you incapable of having a normal relationship. My husband and I used to occasionally watch porn and can assure you we have a perfectly normal relationship and have never progressed to more extreme porn.
No-one has said he was watching porn in front of his children which I agree is unacceptable.
As for the women not being consenting adults, that might be the case in some seedy underground stuff but I’m sure the majority are consenting and are laughing all the way to the bank.

I agree that there's nothing wrong with watching consenting adults having sex, but you're very naive and misinformed if you believe that the exploitation of women in the porn industry is limited to just the "seedy underground stuff".

Call me old fashioned but I don’t think I could stay with DH if I knew he was doing that.

It would be a dealbreaker for me.

I know everyone’s different but it would just put me off for life.

I’m not naive nor misinformed nor to I believe or have I said that exploitation was confined to seedy underground stuff. Without being too outing I worked for over 21 years helping women, the majority of whom were very vulnerable and some who were involved in the sex industry. Yes some were exploited but most were doing so through their own choice to fund a lifestyle.

I worked in the porn industry (as a cam girl). Paid for me to study my postgraduate studies and for a deposit on a house. Was I abused, violated and exploited? Nope. Are some women in porn? Yes. So are many women in nail salons, massage parlours, commercial cleaning, vegetable farming... all are high risk industries for modern slavery. If you have an issue with porn on that basis but don't check where your onions come from or the backstory of who is doing your nails, you're a hypocrite and nothing more.

Back to OP's point, I wouldn't appreciate it. Porn is a time luxury - you shouldn't be rushing around while he's sat watching it. I'd say the same if he were doing everything and you went off for a relaxing bath. It's checking out while the other works - it's not accepted in my marriage where we both do or both rest.

I also should add that in some instances these women were very clever exploiting the men. Having said that exploitation of anyone is wrong and education is the key to try and steer them away from that lifestyle

Ew that’s grim. Was he knocking one out in the lounge or just watching.