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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to complain about this to the school?

32 replies

Frozo · 19/06/2025 21:33

DS is at a non-religious school (our local, non-selective state school) that is part of a wider school federation. His school is not religious, but the federation has another school which is. The school doesn’t have its own board of governors - there’s one board for both, and one Executive Head for both. The other school in the Federation is a C of E school. The Executive Head is very religious and the local Reverend is on the Board of Governors. As it isn’t a C of E school, no church funding goes to DS’s school, it does go to the other school in the Federation.

I don’t mind DS being exposed to religion at all. I’m very happy with religious/bible stories being used to show values that we all believe members of society should have (i.e. the innkeeper letting Mary and Joseph in can be a discussion around empathy/kindness/ingenuity or a bible story teaching forgiveness or patience or whatever). I wouldn’t mind a story from any religion for these purposes - or a non-religious text (like Aesop’s fables, etc). I don’t personally know what I believe religion-wise and I’m happy for DS to have his own opinions and beliefs as long as he’s a good person.

However, there have been several occasions now where I feel that the school are hugely overstepping in terms of the religion that they’re teaching DS. Two examples from this week are (we were not informed about either):

  1. The Reverend came into the school and spoke to the class. DS reports that if someone is a good person or helps other people, that makes them at Christian and if they don’t do those things then they aren’t a Christian. I obviously wasn’t there and don’t know exactly what was said but that is the belief that DS left with. I strongly disagree with this - I believe there are people of all religions and none who are good people who help others, and bad people of all religions and none too. I strongly do not want DS to be taught that any demographic in society are morally superior to another.
  2. The second issue is that their story of the week is the story of Zachheus. I’m not well versed in the bible but my understanding is that the message of this story about coming to Jesus. There doesn’t appear to be any message to the story other than that coming to Jesus makes you a better person. Google says that the message of the story is “the transformative power of encountering Jesus”. Again, I am not ok with this. I do not accept that DS (or anyone else) needs to find Jesus to be a good, moral and happy person.

I think that the school are completely overstepping here and pushing a narrative that should not be happening in a non-religious school. I think it’s harmful and undermining the message we teach at home (to not judge other by their labels, backgrounds or demographics). It’s far more aggressively religious than my primary school (which was a C of E school).

What are thoughts? Am I being precious?

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 19/06/2025 22:10

um, it is definitely not a Christian belief that if you are a good person you are a Christian.

in fact it is fairly widely agreed that the only requirement for being a Christian is to “let Jesus into your life” and many people who have become Christian have done some extremely bad things, as indeed have many Christians.

repentance is considered an important part of Christianity.

Christianity generally also accepts that there are good people of other religions and none who have a place in heaven (the “virtuous pagans” section) see
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virtuous_pagan

Frozo · 19/06/2025 22:11

RichardGeresTie · 19/06/2025 22:09

In that case, he’s very young and may be getting the wrong end of the stick a little bit.
Do you know definitely that school have been telling them that anything other than Christianity is wrong?
I work in a C of E junior school and while we have “collective worship” a few times a week, we still have the usual R.E lessons focusing on different religions or celebrations depending on the topic.
Also we do emphasise the point that “this is what the people that follow this religion believe. Other people do things differently”

In your shoes I’d speak to the class teacher to get some clarity on what and how they teach R.E.

I wasn’t there to know what was said but it’s the impression that DS has been left with on several occasions (i.e. it’s the message he took away whether it’s the message they intended) and other mums have said the same thing

OP posts:
Marchitectmummy · 19/06/2025 22:13

Frozo · 19/06/2025 21:41

This isn’t the RE scheme of work. This appears to be the “collective worship” that other posters have mentioned. Seems entirely pointless to have non-religious schools if they all have to worship anyway…

It may not be RE but they may be using this as a way to tock off the RE hours. Find out before you go on blazing.

CorneliaCupp · 19/06/2025 22:14

Frozo · 19/06/2025 22:03

You don’t speak for all Christians - many Christians do believe that.

And yes, C of E schools are funded by the government in the normal way and then receive financial support from the Church on top

Some Christians may well believe that, you are right, but it is definitely not what the Bible says.
VC schools receive no additional funding from the Church, VA schools are funded slightly differently but any funding the receive from the Church is only for building work and comes from the diocese via the government.
There is no additional funding.

CorneliaCupp · 19/06/2025 22:16

Come from the government via the diocese rather, and is the same funding that non Church schools would receive via the local authority.

PuppiesProzacProsecco · 19/06/2025 22:18

See it as an opportunity to explain to your DS why sane, rational people don't blindly believe everything the god-botherers tell them.

Endofyear · 19/06/2025 23:19

If you're concerned I'd suggest going in and having a conversation with his teacher as a first step.

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