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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this nurse was unprofessional?

383 replies

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 17:06

So I went for an appointment at my GP surgery to try and verify the accuracy of two home blood pressure monitors we have in our house. The two monitors give virtually identical readings to each other for everyone in our family - but for my sister one reads 10 - 15 points lower than the other on thr systolic number.

During the appointment, my sister attempted to explain the situation and that she wanted to compare both machines against a manual reading. The nurse immediately told her to "just bin" one of the machines without any attempt to even compare it

The nurse then proceeded to only check one of the machines (the one that reads lower). When the machine displayed a reading of 150/100, she then performed a "manual check" and literally immediately stated "yeah 150/100". Might be just me, but this rapid confirmation seems like the nurse was simply just re-stating the reading she had seen on the machines screen (literally told me her reading was the exact same number) rather than conducting a genuine, independent manual verification. Her pre-judgement of which machine was correct was evident from the beginning, as she refused to consider checking the second machine, despite my clear explanation of the discrepancy of both machines for me, but identical readings for the rest of the family

As a result, I was left in the exact same position I was in before the appointment. I actually suffer from anxiety and came back in tears at how sharp and unhelpful she had been, and because it seemed she had made her mind up there and then she was only checking one machine and that was the correct one (despite them giving the same readings for everyone else), i don't trust what she told me at all

OP posts:
ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 22:09

Impatient6227 · 19/06/2025 22:04

Absolutely important to have accurate readings, easily established by going to a pharmacy and not taking up an appointment.

I can quite conclusively say it WAS a wasted appointment given OP doesn't believe the nurse when she confirmed manual vs BP machine, or do you disagree?

Also, this nurse told me to bin one of the machines before she had even checked either one of them. Pre made her mind up she was only going to check the one she chose

Had she not have told me to one before even checking either one, I'd have been more confident

OP posts:
ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 22:11

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 19/06/2025 22:07

But since she did get the same reading from the machine she tested as from the surgery’s machine, she was right about that, wasn’t she, @ThisCoolOP?

Regardless of whether she had made up her mind ahead of time, she did demonstrate that you do have a BP machine that is giving accurate readings - hopefully that should set your mind at rest.

Tbh, no she didnt prove i have an accurate machine at all as I think she just tead the reading back to me she had seen on the screen as she had made her mind up at the start that was the correct one. As proved by her telling me to bin one of them before she'd even checked either

OP posts:
Digdongdoo · 19/06/2025 22:11

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 22:11

Tbh, no she didnt prove i have an accurate machine at all as I think she just tead the reading back to me she had seen on the screen as she had made her mind up at the start that was the correct one. As proved by her telling me to bin one of them before she'd even checked either

Make a complaint then.

Impatient6227 · 19/06/2025 22:12

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 22:06

Again, that doesn't excuse all the nasty comments from people on this thread saying my behaviour is disgusting and they can't get an appointment because of "people like me"

I didnt book it myself, I asked for advice on our online portal and a healthcare assistant booked the appointment. I did not ask for it

I didn't excuse any nasty comments OP. I was replying to a post from a PP and simply pointing out it was a waste of time for everyone as you still dont trust the conclusion from the nurse.

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 22:15

Digdongdoo · 19/06/2025 22:11

Make a complaint then.

Part of me wants to, as she shouldn't be telling people to bin machines before she's even bothered checking them, which then gives the impression she's just pre made her mind up

And she's the only one I've ever felt like making a complaint about. Every other one has been so lovely

And tbh, I know i' not the only one has felt that with this particular nurse. I know others who won't see her now because she talks over them and doesn't listen properly. She told me to bin the machine while I was still trying to explain

And honestly, i know how hard they work so would never make a complaint lightly. Never ever felt the need to make a complaint before, the majority are so lovely and helpful

OP posts:
ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 22:19

Impatient6227 · 19/06/2025 22:12

I didn't excuse any nasty comments OP. I was replying to a post from a PP and simply pointing out it was a waste of time for everyone as you still dont trust the conclusion from the nurse.

Aww, no problem :) it really was a waste of time and I so wish it hadn't been as I'd love to be here now with trust in what she said

But it was the fact she told me to bin one of the machines, before she even checked the accuracy of either machine. Basically chose which one she was testing and to bin the other. Then told me the one she had chosen to test was correct, just really seemed like she had pre made her mind up

And not the first to have had problems with her. I know others in the area who won't see her now because she talks over them and hasn't listened properly to them etc

Lots of others in the surgery are so lovely, and you have full confidence in what they say. But this nurse just zero confidence at all that she hadn't just told me the same number of the screen because she made her mind up in the beginning

OP posts:
Flashahah · 19/06/2025 22:50

OP AIBU

MN YES

OP No, I’m not and I will keep adding stuff and drip feeding until you say IANBU!

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:04

Flashahah · 19/06/2025 22:50

OP AIBU

MN YES

OP No, I’m not and I will keep adding stuff and drip feeding until you say IANBU!

You'll keep drip feeding stuff until I say I am not being unreasonable? Sorry, don't understand?

OP posts:
BusyExpert · 19/06/2025 23:08

Rhinohides · 19/06/2025 21:44

You were lucky she considered your no machine at all.
As a nurse I won’t get involved with home no kits, just tell folks I can only use the ones verified by my employer.
And yes, as previous people have said, BP varies from moment moment. This would be the case if you were concerned about 1 reading it would potentially be visible in the next.

frankly that is rubbish. Talk about being a jobsworth.

Baggingarea · 19/06/2025 23:16

Op some of the commenters - who clearly have some skin in healthcare - should be ashamed at the way they are posting.

You can disagree and get your point across without monstering a poor woman with already high blood pressure.

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:18

Baggingarea · 19/06/2025 23:16

Op some of the commenters - who clearly have some skin in healthcare - should be ashamed at the way they are posting.

You can disagree and get your point across without monstering a poor woman with already high blood pressure.

Thank you, your comment means a lot to me. Some of the comments have been upsetting to read, but had some lovely people who have messaged to make sure I'm okay and appreciate every one of those messages x

OP posts:
Flashahah · 19/06/2025 23:25

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:04

You'll keep drip feeding stuff until I say I am not being unreasonable? Sorry, don't understand?

Edited

Adding in the bit about “others in the area having problems with her”

Now saying people won’t see her.

Perhaps you were given an appointment with her, because they wanted you to understand you were time wasting?

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:34

Flashahah · 19/06/2025 23:25

Adding in the bit about “others in the area having problems with her”

Now saying people won’t see her.

Perhaps you were given an appointment with her, because they wanted you to understand you were time wasting?

Give someone an appointment to show someone they are time wasting? As if they are going to give away an appointment slot to "show me i am time wasting".... I'm being bashed for being ridiculous, that's even more ridiculous for you to say than anything I've said 😂

Whoever booked the appointment after reading my portal message didn't find my asking for advice on so unreasonable did they? As yes, despite others I know who won't see her, there will be others that need an appointment that they could have given it to. Honestly you're going on like i asked for them to book an appointment..... I didn't!

OP posts:
Theroadt · 19/06/2025 23:46

screwyou · 19/06/2025 17:14

I am only shocked a Nurse would waste her time with you under these circumstances and I am a Nurse.

No wonder it takes ages to see anyone at a surgery with such silly complaints - and I have high blood pressure too!

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:50

Theroadt · 19/06/2025 23:46

No wonder it takes ages to see anyone at a surgery with such silly complaints - and I have high blood pressure too!

It wasnt a silly complaint - honestly! Asked for advice which as a patient you're perfectly entitled to do. I didn't phone for an appointment as I wouldnt take an urgent slot from someone else on purpose! The surgery were perfectly within their rights to come back and say they couldn't help, but clearly whoever triaged the portal message felt they could and it was them who said to bring both machines in! Was only doing what I had been asked to do! Please don't tar me as being at fault for you or whoever else not being able to get an appointment. Wasn't like I phoned to request an urgent appointment

OP posts:
Theroadt · 19/06/2025 23:51

OP is writing screeds and screeds of rubbish on this thread. I’m sorry - I have high bp just measure, if high get to see a doctor. But no, let’s go on and on and on about testing two machines and a sister (of one machine & two sisters? I lost the plot…)

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:55

Theroadt · 19/06/2025 23:51

OP is writing screeds and screeds of rubbish on this thread. I’m sorry - I have high bp just measure, if high get to see a doctor. But no, let’s go on and on and on about testing two machines and a sister (of one machine & two sisters? I lost the plot…)

Another person enjoying the pile on? Honestly, I'm not writing rubbish at all. As proved by the nice few in the thread who have totally understood! And the nice few who have checked in due to all the nasty comments to make sure i am okay

OP posts:
Flashahah · 19/06/2025 23:57

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:34

Give someone an appointment to show someone they are time wasting? As if they are going to give away an appointment slot to "show me i am time wasting".... I'm being bashed for being ridiculous, that's even more ridiculous for you to say than anything I've said 😂

Whoever booked the appointment after reading my portal message didn't find my asking for advice on so unreasonable did they? As yes, despite others I know who won't see her, there will be others that need an appointment that they could have given it to. Honestly you're going on like i asked for them to book an appointment..... I didn't!

Edited

What were you asking for then? Then to fix your machine first your sister via telepathy? They gave you the nurse most likely to make you feel
uncomfortable about the request.

They gave you an appointment and told you your BP, job done.

92% of voters say YABU, it’s pretty conclusive!

Flashahah · 19/06/2025 23:58

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:55

Another person enjoying the pile on? Honestly, I'm not writing rubbish at all. As proved by the nice few in the thread who have totally understood! And the nice few who have checked in due to all the nasty comments to make sure i am okay

100 posts since 5pm! Don’t take your BP now!

Honestly, let it go!

ThisCoolOP · 19/06/2025 23:59

Flashahah · 19/06/2025 23:57

What were you asking for then? Then to fix your machine first your sister via telepathy? They gave you the nurse most likely to make you feel
uncomfortable about the request.

They gave you an appointment and told you your BP, job done.

92% of voters say YABU, it’s pretty conclusive!

Have you literally heard how horrible and nasty you sound :( they gave me an appointment to make me feel uncomfortable, literally no surgery would ever give someone an appointment just to make them feel uncomfortable. What a horrible and nasty comment!

OP posts:
ThisCoolOP · 20/06/2025 00:00

Flashahah · 19/06/2025 23:58

100 posts since 5pm! Don’t take your BP now!

Honestly, let it go!

Just replying to your nasty comment above, they gave me an appointment to make me feel uncomfortable. Literally how can you make such an unkind comment?

OP posts:
spicemaiden · 20/06/2025 00:09

Ok, so…the GP wants 7 days of readings yes?

Give both sets instead of just stalling because you don’t know whoch is yhd accurate machine.

ThisCoolOP · 20/06/2025 00:17

spicemaiden · 20/06/2025 00:09

Ok, so…the GP wants 7 days of readings yes?

Give both sets instead of just stalling because you don’t know whoch is yhd accurate machine.

Hey :)

Could actually do that to be fair - only thing is I have to do 2 in a morning and 2 at night.

Couldn't put both machines readings on the one from. So might mean me photocopying it and doing 4 in a morning and 4 at night so that both machines readings are separate - might be too much haha. But that is something I could actually do :)

Thank you for the nice comment too x

OP posts:
Flashahah · 20/06/2025 00:19

ThisCoolOP · 20/06/2025 00:00

Just replying to your nasty comment above, they gave me an appointment to make me feel uncomfortable. Literally how can you make such an unkind comment?

Oh give over!!

AIBU is not the place for you!

Flashahah · 20/06/2025 00:20

ThisCoolOP · 20/06/2025 00:00

Just replying to your nasty comment above, they gave me an appointment to make me feel uncomfortable. Literally how can you make such an unkind comment?

Over 100 posts now! Honestly, let it go!