Car embarrassment

[Iambouddicca]

We are a 2 car household but DH’s car is in the garage with what seems to be terminal engine trouble.

Next week we are travelling cross country to family wedding (DHs side) quite a smart occasion ( country house hotel etc).

I assumed we would travel to the wedding in my car - which is a battered- old hatchback on the grounds that it goes, fits everyone in and has both air con and a working radio. But DH is now saying he wants to hire a car - and he has admitted that it is because he is embarrassed of us going in mine…

I think he is being snobby and ridiculous and no one will ( or should) care about what car we travel in.. and that taking a family of four to a wedding is expensive enough as it is…

who is being unreasonable?

He is. He can clean it if he wants, but why spend additional cash if it fits everyone amd is reliable?

If he pays for it, out of his money, then fine. Seems completely pointless to me though.

😲 of course he's being the unreasonable one!
What notions!!! No-one will even look so your car, let alone judge you for it!
A car that goes is a million times better than a car that has terminal engine troubles.

As long as he’s paying for it and does all the admin for it, just leave him to it.

Urgh dh would be like this. I adored my battered old car bit dh was mortified by it but would have been too tight to hire a car lol

Hire the Four Weddings and a Funeral mini ...

What's your financial situation?

it could be nice to hire a fun car for the weekend, lively weather for a convertible.

bit if money is tight. Then he just need to get over it.

It's almost like a vanity and ego tax!

Complete waste of money.

People who care most about other people's opinion are usually those who waste the most money.

It's terribly gauche to care about what car you drive.

I attend events with the aristocracy (I'm not a member of the aristocracy myself, I'm from a working class background) and they turn up in battered old £500 Fiestas.

I doubt anyone will notice your car, however if he wants to pay for a hire car let him.

Alternatively, if you are quite cheeky and only going over night, find a car dealership that does the 24hr test drives, its free

I don't get this car snobbery. My husbands friends was mocking our car(7 year old suv) and boasting about his 1 year old bmw.

He soon shut up when I reminded him we have circa 5 -7 holidays per year as we don't have a huge financial payment plan and that his wife was complaining they hadn't been on holiday for 2 years....

Those who care don't matter, and those who matter won't care.

I think I’d be more embarrassed to turn up in a hire care if I had a safe, functional alternative however battered.

As long as yours will definitely hold up on the journey, I think hiring one would be an utter waste of money.

I think he's being unreasonable, but I don't necessarily think that no-one will notice or care, because if he would, maybe it's because his family are like that too?

What a total moron

Tell him no one is going to see the car - you will be one of dozens of cars parking at the venue. Just clean the outside so it’s shiny. Deal done.

We drove to a country house wedding in a line of cars (from the church), the car park attendant was lining cars up in front of the venue but took one look at our tatty ancient mini and directed us to park around the back! 😆

Point out to DH that money spent on a hire car would be better used put towards his car replacement.

He's being ridiculous. What's really embarrassing is his lame Hyacinth Bouquet-level pretensions, not your car. Most people don't care about or won't even notice what car you have. The ones who do are not worth thinking about.

while I do think that he would be wasting his money I have been to an event where I desperately would have like a new outfit because I felt drab and unfashionable. So I can kind of see his point.

DH’s family really judge other people’s houses. After they visit someone they talk about the house and neighbourhood etc to each other in great judgy detail. So DH can be very self conscious about our house, while not actually having the finances to back up his aspirations. He has mellowed over time but old habits run deep.

I’d find your DH’s attitude embarrassing, not the car - sorry!

I do have a 2001 Fiesta though 😂

Break it to him gently that literally no one cares enough about you to even notice what car you drive to this wedding, let alone judge it

We're they really mocking you for a 7 yr old SUV? That's still a pretty fancy car, hardly a rusty banger.

And finance on a car is not going to pay for 5-7 holidays a year. Boasting about money whether it's cars or holidays is never a good look

I agree with this.

Going in your older, less-nice car because the first-choice one is out of action is what normal people would do.

Turning up in a (probably quite new and shiny) hire car will inevitably cause people to say "Ooh, fancy new car?!" Then when you tell them it's a hire car, they commiserate with both of your cars being out of action, but then you admit that one of them is just fine, but you thought it would may you look better to unnecessarily pay a lot of money to travel to somebody else's wedding in a hire car... how cringe!