to want to tell my neighbour to fark off

[phishphood]

she lives below me and so knows if i am in or not. she keeps popping up and bringing cakes and biscuits, 3 or 4 times a week! I dont even see my mum that much! One week I only saw her 2x and she said "oh I havent seen you for ages" We dont have much in common apart from the children. SHe just plonks herself on my sofa and gabs away.

I used to sit and chat but after weeks of this if I need to do something I say, and so will go and unload washing etc. But she doesnt leave she just picks up the remote and puts on TV.

I now try to creap up the stairs past her so she cant hear but she has ears like a bat.

I have tried putting music on so as its like I cant hear doorbell but then she goes back and phones up. Have ignored and pretended I was in shower but she comes up later on.

One day she came up morning and afternoon, that was just the once though.

Short of moving house what can I DO??

oh just to add the cakes arent like a gift so i cant accept them and close the door, its like "ive brought these for us to have" kind of thing

Tell her you are starting a business from home and so won't be able to chat so often any more. Tell her you hope she understands if you sometimes have to say "Not Today" when she pops in - you won't be meaning to be rude, it's just that you have to get on with your work.

can you catch a case of Very Serious Religion? one of those types that requires you to recruit as many sinners as possible in order for them to be saved?

might scare her off

I think she sounds lovely!

Don't let her in! Just say oh sorry I'm very busy, I'll see you another day.

Branflake, yesterday she was up here for 2 hours moaning about her bunions. dh says i should have suggested she stop walking up the stairs so much to mine as it might help them

religion idea sounds good

This would drive me mad - I'm friendly but like to keep myself to myself iykwim. I'd hate this, not sure what to suggest.

She's obviously a bit lonely. I feel sorry for her to be honest. Can't you tell her, a bit more politely obviously, what you have told us ie. the truth. That you are a bit busy, have things to do, can't sit around all day, (maybe embellish it a bit eg. dh has been complaining that you don't get enough done etc.). You could warn her about this the next time she comes round, so it is not a surprise when you next turn her away at the door.

Then really don't let her in!

Would you like to see her at all eg. once a week, if so you could say- but I'm happy to see you eg. on Friday mornings. Schedule it in so she isn't constantly popping in.

I used to know someone who always answered the door in her coat. If it was someone she wanted to see, she would say she'd just got home and invite them in. If it was someone she didn't want to see, she was just on her way out. Worked a treat.

karen she lives under me she can hear if im in

This would drive me mad too. She is obviously lonely but it's not fair on you but short of falling out with her or moving then god knows what you can do that won't seem impolite. Can you start inviting some other friends over to spend time with or arranging to go to theirs just so you can get out of the house more? Maybe pick up some leaflets for her and hint that she should get involved like becoming a homestart volunteer or moms and tots groups she could attend.

karenthirl that's brilliant wish i had thought of that when the jehovahs witnesses came yesterday

sometimes she does big stinking shits in my toilet i mean ffs do it before you come up woman

Maybe that's why she comes over?

I think hunker is right. Buy the cheapest and nastiest bog roll you can find.

Seriously, the home business idea sounds good. And you can always say oh, I'm really sorry, I'd love to tell you about it but I've signed all these non-disclosure agreements you see.

Do you ever go round hers?

Last nigth I had a few friends over for the eurovision, they brought their children and we tucked them up in the cupboard spare room. We had a few bottles of wine and a nice chat, was bliss. Friends H smokes and so was going down to the back courts as no smoking allowed in my flat, he left my front door open...5 mins later in walks my neighbour

I ask if the noise is a problem? (we werent being THAT loud, was only half 8 ish) She says no no and SITS DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and starts asking about the grass cutting rota out the back

sounds like you'll just have to be blunt. 'Oh I'm really busy so can't ask you in right now, sorry' and close door.