Just moaning - I’m exhausted and it doesn’t end

[Merryoldgoat]

I have no AIBU - I’m just knackered.

Work is hard atm and I’m just done in. Heavy workload, responsible job, tricky staff to manage, tight deadlines.

The two children with ASD who have constant meetings, EHCP interventions, looking at a change of placement for one so that’s more work.

Laundry never ends. Housework never ends.

DH does his share 100% - we’re just both done in.

I feel fat (I am so that’s not surprising), old, tired and grumpy as fuck.

I’m not alone am I?

Luckily money isn’t an issue for us in that we earn decent money and are not right for cash but everything else.

Seriously considering 2 nights in a Premier Inn just so no one talks to me for a couple of days.

Is there anyone who could have dc so you and dh can go away for a night or two? Look at canopy and stars or cool stays. They have really beautiful off grid places you can really switch off.

No one who could have both overnight - the little one is a wrecking ball and strong as an ox and has the engine of a jumbo jet.

@Merryoldgoat oh I’m sorry that sounds tough. Could they be separated and go to different people for the night? ( I have v little family help btw so understand if it’s not feasible) we get one break a year but only when my parent is in the country as they live abroad!

If not could you have a couple of nights off then let dh do the same the next weekend? Can you handle both dc alone?

Actually that might work - why didn’t I think of that? 🤣

The boys have wonderful grandparents (my PIL) and they will take older boy away for a week in August - I could potentially get our nanny to look after little one overnight for one night then…

Nanny sounds fancy but she’s an after school childminder really but we had to get a nanny as we needed the care at home.

I’d hate to impose on her but she is absolutely wonderful so that might work.

Can you pay for a cleaner and baby sitters

Can definitely do this in theory - it’s finding the time but I think writing the OP has crystallised that I’m not prioritising any self care.

Hi. Its pants. We have a delicate balance at the moment where finally my kids have brilliant TAs and an understanding high school (and medication all round for all of us lol)

Iv started taking 10min walk around the block on an evening just to try and maintain sanity too

I have an after school nanny who helps but I could look at this.We had a cleaner before but getting things in a decent state for her to clean was challenging sometimes and it meant she’d tidy and then not clean.

@Hankunamatata The doctor suggested tapering off my Sertraline and I spiralled very fast.

Thankfully schools for both boys are amazing - both in specialist which is a big difference.

@Merryoldgoat I’d ask her! Worst she can do is say no 😜

I think you’ve already had some good advice but I just wanted to say that I see you and that you’re doing a great job, even when you think you’re not.

I hope you get a break soon as it sounds like you bloody well deserve it.

@AngryBird6122 I’ll broach it with her tomorrow maybe.

@BitOutOfPractice Thank you that’s very kind.

Currently on the sofa with a naked child on me, washing machine and dishwasher going and decided wine was on order.

It is tough :(

If you have the money look into getting a housekeeper. I also found having a cleaner more stressful as I had to tidy up first, but our housekeeper is an angel sent from heaven. She only comes round 2-3 hours a week but she tidies the playroom, DDs bedroom and kitchen. Cleans the bathrooms and hoovers. And even folds up washing, puts a load on, does the dishwasher etc. She organised my kitchen drawers once as she had some extra time! My stress levels have been greatly reduced since she came into our lives.

I also have one day off a week (Friday) which is my "me" time. Again I realise not everyone can do this. But it makes a lot of difference. Sometimes I do chores but other times I literally just go for a walk and read a book or do some hobby or other. Those few hours fuel me up.

A housekeeper sounds amazing…

Not much to add but I feel you, you need a break.

I had the temerity to just sit and leave the kids for 10 mins whilst browsing MN

My fan is broken
The fish light tube has been emptied on the floor
the bathroom shelves have been ripped off the wall.

@Merryoldgoat I really hope you get a break 😓