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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want ds to go to a party and jump on a trampoline without a net?

77 replies

rosybud · 23/05/2008 13:28

Ds (8) has been invited to his friend's party to swim in an (unfenced) pool and jump on a trampoline without a net.

I am not happy about this.

We don't have a trampoline so ds is not an experienced jumper, the other boys are bigger/heavier than him. Dh is very concerned as I am...but I know ds will feel i am being overly cautious and spoiling the fun!

Do I stand my ground and insist he is not to go on the trampoline or am i over-reacting?

OP posts:
OverMyDeadBody · 23/05/2008 17:10

I know LL, but we can't wrap out kids in cotton wool, or netting, and I think the ratio of limbs breaking to necks breaking is quite big.

I know I'm more lax than most people on this though, maybe my perspective is different. DS participates in high risk sports and I don't worry about accidents. I will worry about them if and when they happen.

When I was a teacher I witnessed a 4 yr old jump off one step and break both legs. Accidents could potentially happen in even the safest environments.

ShadowOfBlueTiger · 23/05/2008 17:11

My niece is 11, they were 3 kids on the trampoline, one girl (quite heavy build) fell on my niece (a waif) and she broke her arm just over the wrist.

ShadowOfBlueTiger · 23/05/2008 17:14

OMDB
I used to jump from the roof of my old school when I was little, of course my mum did not know. Sometimes children have no sense. I never got injured, and I had a tendency of tackling roofs, I loved climbing over buildings. Nobody can say it was safe, but I was careful, minded my steps. I was a good climber.

pofaced · 23/05/2008 17:15

I have a trampoline with enclosure and hate when more than one or two kids visit as they can be dangerous and too many nasty accidents: we've even had one fall out (head first) through the gap in the enclosure... . If he's been invited early, why not tell him to do his trampolining then and so he can play a different game later; all the party goers can't be on trampoline at the same time so there will be something else going on at the same time. tell him not to try somersaults and not to go under the trampoline when other kids on it (very popular with daredevils around here). As for swimming, I'd check there was someone there while they are swimming: even if he's a good swimmer, the water will be freezing cold so it'll take his breath away when he gets in.

Have there been other trampoline/ swimming parties with similar age kids atthe house before? If so, parents may havve definite rules. if not, the parents may not have thought through the safety side of tings

You are not being neurotic

TheDevilWearsPrimark · 23/05/2008 17:16

'An experienced jumper' don't be so precious.

Vivace · 23/05/2008 17:16

I personally wouldn't let an eight year old go to a party without me where there was an unfenced swimming pool and no lifeguard. I just wouldn't trust a few busy, preoccupied family members without a particular interest in my child to really be alert.

OverMyDeadBody · 23/05/2008 17:17

ShadowofBlueTiger you could still do that now as an adult! It is a recognised (but illegal) activity in the town I live in! It's all done in the cover of darkness too.

I climb disused railway bridges now

pofaced · 23/05/2008 17:17

OMDB: high risk sports involve calculated risks with safety considerations. 15 8 year olds with a trampoline and unguarded swimming pool involves danger, not risk!

apologies for typos in previous post

legalalien · 23/05/2008 17:19

when I was a kid I had a lot of lots of kids jumping on the trampoline / no pads / no enclosure experiences, often "water on the tramp" (involving putting your running garden hose on one corner of the trampoline and jumping up and down in the water - nice and slippery - and sometimes trampolines with a sort of nylon fishnet base (rather than vinyl). As a result I have seen quite a lot of trampoline injuries, so DS is getting a horribly expensive spring free one (which I ordered this afternoon.)

I don't think you're being unreasonable. I think it will be hard, though, for your DS to tell the others he's not allowed to go on the trampoline - not sure what the answer is to that.

OverMyDeadBody · 23/05/2008 17:20

I agree, it is more a danger than a risk, but there are also some things that some parents might percieve as a danger while others would percieve it as a risk.

I'd be more worrid about the pool than the trampoline, and make sure it would be properly supervised at all times.Drowning is a danger, falling of a trampoline and breaking a bone is a risk.

pointydog · 23/05/2008 17:21

Must admit, I wouldn't feel too happy. I watched my kids jump around on an unnetted trampoline recently with a group of others and it made me nervous.

I might let him go but ask if I could hang about to watch the trampolining as it sounded like fun

hifi · 23/05/2008 17:21

ffs

FrannyandZooey · 23/05/2008 17:22

I don't think you can consistently take calculated risks and use your own skill and judgement in a situation like this, though, where there are other people using the trampoline and providing far too much unpredictability

I do agree children should be allowed to explore risky situations and learn to trust in their bodies and develop skills etc

a trampoline covered with bouncing bodies is not the place to do it, though

SweetieD · 23/05/2008 17:22

YANBU. I don't think it's a risk you need to take for the sake of a few hours at a party. Go with your gut instinct and do what's right for you and DS however unpopular you feel it makes you.

It may sound silly but as an analogy - how many of us would really share an unnetted big trampoline with lots of other adults, bouncing away like mad and being silly and not have a second's worry about falling off, broken bones etc? (let's say drunk too, to simulate the fearlessness of kids) Would we want to take the risk for ourselves?

pointydog · 23/05/2008 17:28

hifi, you'll need to be more explicit

littlerach · 23/05/2008 17:31

Dd1 went to a party last year, wehn she was 5, with a tramploine with no net.
All the kids swarmed on to it, the mum was saying not to, and in the end there were 12 of them all leaping around.
It was quite scarey to watch!!
And non eof them could hear a bloody thing, as they ewre shreiking os much.

When she finally got them all off, two of them had been jumped on and hurt.

personally, I owuldn't like dd1 to go on one without a net.

Might only be a broken limb, but that's still quite awful for a child, surely.

littlelapin · 23/05/2008 17:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Notquitegrownup · 23/05/2008 17:36

I would be really really concerned about the trampoline too. I just can't understand how kids play on one without a net without coming off the sides.

Iota · 23/05/2008 18:16

more than one person on a trampoline is dangerous, with or without a net

LittleBella · 23/05/2008 19:06

No YANBU.

I wouldn't give a shit if people thought I was neurotic, tbh. I wouldn't let my child go.

pagwatch · 23/05/2008 19:12

I have a trampoline and i let the kids play on it as they will. often the dog gets on too. It is dug though which makes it a bit different. I always check that the mum is happy though or otherwise they are not allowed on it at all.
The only time I imposed rules and watched them was when DS1 was about 10 onwards as they were really silly on it at that age.

If you are uncomfortable you should just say no. I think your instinct is most often 'reasonable'

QuintessentialShadows · 23/05/2008 20:51

OMDB
Maybe I should get back into climbing buildings, it was good fun...

Original poster
rosybud · 23/05/2008 21:11

TheDevilWearsPrimark - I am not being precious when I say ds is not an 'experienced jumper.

Most of his friends do have their own trampolines and I have seen them very confidently bouncing away. Ds is not so confident and it makes a big difference.

OP posts:
Chequers · 23/05/2008 21:14

Message withdrawn

ingles2 · 23/05/2008 21:31

Funnily enough a boy is ds's class has broken his arm on a trampoline this week so YANBU...Silly, risk taking 8 yr old boys? Not a hope as far as I'm concerned.