We’re on holiday this week. There’s been some nice moments but a lot of it has been pretty shit.
DH has some MH issues and isn’t dad of the year. He was away for 10 days before we came away (half work, half leisure) and so we met at holiday destination. Ie i parented solo while working FT (DDs age 9&7) and then travelled with kids on train/bus/plane/car - total door-to-door 13 hours & DD1 (ASD) had a meltdown on arrival as everything was different. (Lessons learned- won’t do this travel again)
DH had a trans-Atlantic flight & arrived on day 2. Day 3 he slept in (understandable) & came to the pool with us which was v nice but then disappeared all afternoon to go get laundry done. He then stayed up til 2am drinking a bottle of red wine & some beers.
Day 4 (today) he slept in again (losing sympathy) & then was pretty ineffective. He then napped after lunch and I took DD1 to the pool.
When we got back he apologised for being a bit rubbish today. I responded saying thank you & I appreciate him saying that.
He has now massively got the hump as apparently I should have said „oh that’s fine; don’t worry about it“.
But it’s NOT fine. I appreciate he’s had a long flight but I’m bloody knackered. I do most of the parenting at home as his MH issues make it difficult for him to deal with DD1. any time I am out for evening (or - god forbid - go away) is very stressful & requires meticulous planning, whereas he can and does regularly go away for work & i just deal with it.
So AIBU to think this is a shit apology and he didn’t mean it?