To think that “motivational people” can be exhausting rather than inspiring?

[SnugShaker]

I’ve decided to distance myself from those overly ‘motivational’ people and friends. You know the type - constantly preaching about hustle culture, positive vibes only and acting like rest or struggle is a personal failure. I get that some people find it uplifting but honestly, I find it exhausting. Sometimes, you just want to vent or be realistic without someone turning everything into a TED talk.

AIBU to think that too much forced motivation can actually be draining rather than inspiring?

Yanbu, sometimes it's like they are trying to convince themselves rather than anyone else.

YANBU. And it's often those who don't have a great life, or are MLM sales people who like to motivate (sell to) others).

Where do you come across people like this in your day to day life?

It’s been a mix - colleagues who’ve bought into hustle culture, friends who see any negativity as “low vibration”, and online spaces that equate realism with failure. Just feels relentless sometimes.

who are these people that need to make speeches when you meet?

Well I suppose it's easy enough to avoid the online spaces. Can't you tell your friends that it isn't something you want to hear?

I do try to avoid those spaces when I can but when it’s friends, it’s more layered. It’s not always easy to say, “Hey, could you be less upbeat?” without sounding petty or like you’re raining on their parade. Sometimes it’s not one big thing, just the cumulative pressure of always having to frame everything as a growth opportunity. It can get a bit much.

You have to realise they aren't up beat...they are trying the flog you something, more than likely these people will.be rewarded for introducing you to whichever guru they've been conned by.

Everyone I've ever met with a side hustle never made a penny out of it or really impacted their actual job to a huge degree

Totally agree! I dearly wish I could come off LinkedIn (am required to have an account for work purposes.) But I find the constant self promotion and humble-bragging from some individuals in my work network utterly exhausting.

It's toxic positivity

It depends if they're genuinely motivational or fake motivational!

Years ago a friend of mine wanted to lose weight and ended up at this nutrition club which then sell them these Herbylife (?) shakes and various other vitamins and bars.

The "health and motivational coach" just kept telling her what she wanted to hear "You look amazing", "These products are doing wonders for you", "if anyone says anything negative they're just jealous", "you shouldn't associate with negative people" etc...

In reality she was miserable. The shakes and snacks made her hungry if she did the diet properly, so any weight lost she'd just put back on if she stopped. She could hardly afford them. She ended up losing SO many friends who tried telling her the diet clearly wasn't the right one for her, but her motivational coach just basically poisoned her against them and said some nasty stuff. It was almost like a cult! Her motivational coach became her bestie!

She did stop eventually and went with a sensible diet and exercise method, but had lost/damaged several friendships. Needless to say when she wasn't buying into the product any more, the motivational coach just ditched her like a bad smell which was awful as she genuinely thought this woman was a friend. Clearly the whole thing was about money.

I do like motivational people who have genuinely done something amazing.