Driveway wars - awkward petty neighbour

[Tarytino]

We live on a shared drive way (shared with 3 houses). We’re in the middle. Yesterday we had a friend over and I told him to park just outside of our house (on the shared driveway) as house 3 was out. An hour or so later house 3 arrives home - instead of simply asking him to move the car they sat there honking on the horn. It’s a short driveway, they could have parked at the end and walked down to their house (plenty of parking on street at end of driveway) but no. Friend went out and moved his car - no thanks, no acknowledgment. Once they had got passed friend moved his car back where it was.

10 mins later - horn honking outside. House 3 had decided to go out again. Friend goes out to move car. 20 minutes later more honking outside. I went out and approached neighbour asking why she is honking her horn rather than using her words. She said “I need to get to my house and there is a car in the way” 🙄 I said “yes, but you don’t need to honk the horn, just knock”. She said “can’t be arsed getting in and out of car”. I left her to it and friend moved car. Needless to say, 20 mins later, more honking outside.

now it was very obvious that neighbour was deliberately going in and out of driveway to make some kind of point. So we played her game and this went on for about 2 hours before she eventually got bored.

Today, we are having gravel delivered and they will be parking on the shared driveway. Normally I’d warn neighbour to let her know to get her car out of driveway so she doesn’t get stuck but because of yesterdays performance - I’m not going to bother. This isn’t the first time we have had issues with this neighbour btw. AIBU to let her get her car stuck? Chances are she won’t be going out anyway but no doubt as soon as she sees someone parked there she’ll suddenly develop an urgent need to go out 🙄

it can work with a normal amount of goodwill and good manners, but I'd not do it again.

Are the spaces allocated per house. We had a shared driveway but each space was allocated per house. You can not park in other peoples spaces if they are allocated.

These shared drives typically have some kind of wording in covenants restricting obstruction for access

@Tarytino Sorry OP, but I think YABU. If it's such a short walk from the road to your neighbour's house at the end of your shared drive, then it's an even shorter walk to your house, so you should have asked your friend to park on the road, leaving the shared drive clear. It's not as if it was a flying visit - you'd invited them for dinner - so it was going to be a lengthy potential inconvenience for your neighbours.
Re. the gravel delivery today, YABVU. You have no idea if one of your neighbours has an important appointment today and you could cause a big problem for them purely out of spite.
You're in the wrong here OP and you need to see this from your neighbour's pov. They're not doing anything wrong - you are.

You do not block a shared drive and a Tesco / Amazon delivery is totally different as they are doing exactly that delivering so will be moving quickly , someone actually parked could be any period of time . Very inappropriate to think someone should actually walk and knock to get access to their house rather than just honking the horn . YABVVU. Like many other posters this is why I would not consider a house with a shared drive .

You are being completely unreasonable here and a complete CF.

If you are blocking them from getting to their regular parking spot outside their house yabu. Why couldn't your guest parked out on the road? Would you get in & out your car to ask them if the roles were reversed?

I’m gobsmacked that not only are YOU this unreasonable, selfish and unable to grasp it, but that your friend is just as bad and continued to put his car back in the spot blocking her drive repeatedly for 2 hours! This has to be a wind up. Surely it’s not possible for two pigheaded, selfish A-holes to meet like that 🤣

Is this a reverse?
If not, you are blocking your neighbours driveway and think that’s ok?

Legally, you’re not allowed to park on a shared driveway, it’s that simple.

I suppose there's nothing stopping the householders from coming to an agreement between themselves.

Say there's a driveway that's shared between two houses... one householder is an elderly person who doesn't have a car, so she is quite happy for the other house to use it for parking; and then, maybe they put her bins out, mow her lawn for her or whatever.

But all of this depends on good neighbourly relations and clearly-made agreements; not just saying nothing and assuming that it's all yours because you just think that you deserve it more than they do.

Even then, the one 'giving way' can change their mind at any time; and any agreements are obviously null and void if one or more householders move out. It's bizarrely not all that uncommon for CFs to have such an agreement (or even just an assumption on their part) when they previously had a non-car-owning neighbour - then they genuinely believe that the new residents who move in must fall into line as well!

This!!

Your entitlement is shocking, how you can be so blind to your unreasonable conduct is astonishing.

@Tarytino
"He didn’t park on her driveway, he parked outside of our house."
And in doing so he blocked your neighbour's access to her property.

"... house 3 who has a huge driveway that goes around in a semi circle - enough for 3 good sized cars. ... She has more space than anyone."
It's irrelevant how much parking space your neighbours have if they can't get to it.

"She often gets Tesco deliveries which block the shared driveway but we don’t complain, it’s just what you get with a shared driveway."
A food shopping delivery takes 5-10 minutes. Deliveries of all types (including gravel!) are something all three of you home-owners should be making allowances for and warning each other about in advance. Having visitors for hours, blocking the shared driveway, is totally unreasonable. None of you should be allowing this, particularly when, as you've posted, there's plenty of on-street parking at the end of the shared driveway which is just a short walk away.

You need to let your irritation about last night go and recognise that you're in the wrong here, not your neighbour. In future, ask your visitors to park on the street at the end of the shared driveway - problem solved and harmonious relations restored.

I really hope the OP is reconsidering her behaviour and going to behave more reasonably today towards her neighbour. It’s quite amazing that she thought her neighbour was the CF and petty yesterday.

It's really simple.

Don't block your neighbor's drive.

Not you with your gravel.

Not your friend with their car.

She was nice to honk. 😎

If its a short driveway with plenty of parking on the street at the end, why the fuck didn't you tell your visitor to park there instead of blocking your neighbour?

Yes I live in a semi detached house, lived here 20 years, neighbour 24, shared driveway can fit 2 om his side, 2 on mine. He has 4 cars parked on there all the time. I am a reasonable person, I don't have a car as a choose to walk. I though maybe he thinks I don't mind. But then he syatted being funny with me and his family they act so weird and my visitors had no where to park, so I said I need a parking space for my visitors and he was really weird said they'd be trouble and that it's not your drive and he can park where he likes. I was looking out my kitchen window as I was leaving for work and saw the postman across the road and I wondered what way he aas going and the neighbours gf was sitting in tne car and looking like she wanted to argue with me I think she thought I was lookomh at her and me being angry about her being in my space. My neighbour is the possessive one over the driveway lol anyway joys of being a single woman,

well, who else would be friends with them?

If there's so much parking on the street and it's easy to park there and walk down why in earth wouldn't you have your friend do that rather than inconveniencing someone who actually lives there?!
Utterly baffling.

I wish you guys were my neighbours

My whole culture de sac is weird with me because I asked for my own space. I challenged male Dominance and paid the price

So for years you have been unreasonable in blocking access to a shared drive. Frankly I am surprised it has taken this long for them to indicate your massively unreasonable behaviour.

Don't block shared access.

But you blocked the drive?!

You are being ridiculous. You didn't buy a house with a massive driveway so you... don't have a massive driveway. Your friends should park on the street obviously.

Imagine being so entitled you tell your guest to park on someone else’s drive, inconvenience them, and then make a post claiming that you’re in the right. How embarrassing.

@Tarytino my imagination of the shared driveway does not compute! you really need to draw something, photograph it then post.

Why did your friend move their car and block in the neighbour? Your friend should have moved and left it parked on the street