Driveway wars - awkward petty neighbour

[Tarytino]

We live on a shared drive way (shared with 3 houses). We’re in the middle. Yesterday we had a friend over and I told him to park just outside of our house (on the shared driveway) as house 3 was out. An hour or so later house 3 arrives home - instead of simply asking him to move the car they sat there honking on the horn. It’s a short driveway, they could have parked at the end and walked down to their house (plenty of parking on street at end of driveway) but no. Friend went out and moved his car - no thanks, no acknowledgment. Once they had got passed friend moved his car back where it was.

10 mins later - horn honking outside. House 3 had decided to go out again. Friend goes out to move car. 20 minutes later more honking outside. I went out and approached neighbour asking why she is honking her horn rather than using her words. She said “I need to get to my house and there is a car in the way” 🙄 I said “yes, but you don’t need to honk the horn, just knock”. She said “can’t be arsed getting in and out of car”. I left her to it and friend moved car. Needless to say, 20 mins later, more honking outside.

now it was very obvious that neighbour was deliberately going in and out of driveway to make some kind of point. So we played her game and this went on for about 2 hours before she eventually got bored.

Today, we are having gravel delivered and they will be parking on the shared driveway. Normally I’d warn neighbour to let her know to get her car out of driveway so she doesn’t get stuck but because of yesterdays performance - I’m not going to bother. This isn’t the first time we have had issues with this neighbour btw. AIBU to let her get her car stuck? Chances are she won’t be going out anyway but no doubt as soon as she sees someone parked there she’ll suddenly develop an urgent need to go out 🙄

Parties and waking up everyone at 8am on a Saturday?

If this thread is not a wind-up, you are officially a neighbour from hell.

I hope your nice neighbours move soon and someone like you moves in instead. You deserve someone to match you. If you chose to live in a place surrounded by neighbours, you have to show a minimum of consideration and decency.

I have a similar arrangement, shared drive between 3 houses.
You sound like my neighbour. They have 2 cars and constantly parked with one behind the other making it really difficult to get off our drive. They had visitors who did what your friend did and parked on the drive blocking us in.
The final straw was when they had an extension and we said that they couldnt block the drive. They did though and it caused a massive argument with all 3 houses. Ended up they had to park in the street as did the builders.
Since the building work is done, they have 2 parking spaces now and they do not block the drive.
You dont get to park on the drive, its for driving and access. You can only park on your parking space.

If your DH made noise at 8am on a Sunday next to my house, I'd jet wash him.

The rest of it thry sound as petty and passive aggressive as you.

Fancy starting a thread about yourself! Of course you are in the wrong!

You have an incredible lack of self-awareness OP. It’s quite astonishing.

TBH it doesn't sound like you have quite got the concept of shared space.

Shared spaces should be kept as free as possible from things/activity to allow access, which is generally what they exist for. Sometimes they do get blocked by deliveries etc but you should strive to minimise the inconvenience of this to other people.

They are not for guest parking, big plant pots or roaming dogs.

You can figure out why this is so by extrapolating what would happen if everyone who had access to a shared space used it as their own personal space to do what they liked with. Access would be restricted by an obstacle course of garden ornaments, parked cars and packs of roaming animals.

Yeah don’t think this is the justification you think it is. Just makes you sound worse

Would love the neighbour to recognise this thread and come on and tell us her perspective. I think it would be very interesting

8am is far too early on a Sunday to be rattling around washing your car.

I'd love to hear your neighbour's side of this story, OP.

horn honking outside. House 3 had decided to go out again. Friend goes out to move car. 20 minutes later more honking outside. I went out and approached neighbour asking why she is honking her horn rather than using her words. She said “I need to get to my house and there is a car in the way” 🙄 I said “yes, but you don’t need to honk the horn, just knock”. She said “can’t be arsed getting in and out of car”.

Goodness you're rude and unneighbourly, and unreasonable.

Why should your neighbour have to get out of her car and knock on your door to park on her own drive?

And you hink she's the one being rude? You are a nasty neighbour.

So, you get your friends to park so that it blocks your neighbours driveways, and then make out that it’s the neighbours that are arseholes! What an absolute CF you are.

True story. But it just baffles me how they find one another 🤣

'I don't blame the neighbour for honking rather than getting out of her car.'

It is illegal to press your horn in a residential area, other than for safety reasons.

It is also not fair on other neighbours and also very lazy.

The op or their friends should not be blocking the neighbours drive though.

https://www.highwaycodeuk.co.uk/answers/when-is-it-illegal-to-use-your-horn-signal

Jeez OP you sound like one of those ‘nightmare neighbours’. Blocking people’s drives, washing cars at 8 am at the weekend, presumably blocking the drive with planters. I’m so glad I’m not your neighbour.

I think your friend should’ve parked on the road and walked…
You should inform her about the gravel delivery.
stay civil and reasonable…

8am on a Sunday is early.

Loud parties are antisocial.

Why was your dog in a position to be run over?

With virtually everyone telling you that you are the twat, to come back on and still sound like you haven’t had a lightbulb moment (and actually make yourself sound worse) is quite an accomplishment.

You're the unreasonable one. You dont let your visitors block their drive.

You said in your OP that there was plenty of room on the street to park. You should have asked your friend to park there if he was blocking her access. Sorry, you're the one being unreasonable here OP. Making noise at 8am on a Sunday is also a bit antisocial. Might not be early for you but it is to a lot of people.

This is one of the reasons why I always wonder why so many posters on here get worked up about people who don’t drive. 😄

Nobody comes out of this well. How about people a) talk to each other and negotiate rather than engage in idiotic petty games and b) realise that you just make your own life harder with this sort of thing. .

Here’s what I would do -
Firstly, change my thread title to
Driveway wars - awkward petty neighbour (Me)
Then go round with 6 bottles of wine and a card, ask if she has time to chat over a coffee, apologise, that you were utterly hormonal and out of sorts yesterday, you are feeling humiliated and embarrassed at your own irrational behaviour, and ask if she would be able to forgive your aberration.

You could foster a lovely mutually beneficial great relationship with your neighbour going forwards, live happily and peacefully together, and help each other out.

Or you could live your life like you are now.

(I see society generally changing for the worse, and seemingly every 6 months behaviour appears to become worse still, a never ending downward spiral).

‘Plenty of parking on street’ - your friend should have parked on the street then! YABU.

Yeah with neighbours like OP - who needs enemies. What a sad life.

Your entitlement is unblievable. 97% of votes have voted YABU and you're still here bleeting about how your neighbour is the nightmare one. It's you! You're the problem, it's you.

This must be a reverse. Nobody could be this entitled.