To have called DH out for hogging the middle lane

[Buildaaargh]

DH habitually sits in the middle lane when motorway driving and I find it deeply annoying. He says he doesn’t like being on the inside lane as it limits his options but I find it really inconsiderate. This weekend we did a long drive and I pointed out a couple of times when he was doing it.

He said he doesn’t criticise my driving (not entirely accurate) and I shouldn’t criticise his. I get that it’s annoying to have someone pick up on how you’re doing something, but I find it deeply selfish.

YABU - none of your business how he chooses to drive
YANBU - totally fair enough to say something

Huh? The practical alternative is to stay in the inside lane unless you are overtaking something. What practical problem does that cause you?

When I used to drive up the M40 regularly, the police motorcyclist would come up and direct middle-lane hoggers to move over, to keep the traffic flowing.

Middle-lane hogging has got worse I think personally.

Mind you, I live in Ireland, and I had this conversation with a friend once, who was convinced that the middle lane was the correct lane to be in - mind you, they don't have a lot of 3 lane motorway here, so perhaps they do have different rules.

It’s not weaving in and out, it’s overtaking when you need to. It’s really not hard.

so many people don’t know how to drive on a motorway. They can’t join from slip roads and they hog the middle lane. It should be part of the test imo. I took a motorway lesson after I passed my test as I knew I’d be doing a lot of motorway driving. Too many people get on the motorway and are nervous and incompetent.

What on earth makes you think that? The OP’s husband doesn’t think he’s in the wrong, why would that change if a man got in the car?

Because men tend to have a macho pride in how they drive and also tend to mock others more for bad driving - driving like a scared baby hogging the middle lane because you don't know how to change lanes safely is pretty feeble and men don't tend to enjoy looking feeble in front of other men...

Men are also more likely to be shamed into changing their behaviour by other men than by women. Again, it's about image.

I had a similar issue with DH yesterday. We went to see his dad and the usual arrangement is he drives there, and I drive back (because he'll have drinks)
On the way there I found it annoying not to mention quite scary that at points we were being under-taken on our left as well as overtaken on our right. I said (only once) that he was middle lane hogging, and he said he couldn't go any faster because the of car in front which was also middle lane hogging

You are angry about driving even when you aren’t driving! 😂 It is more of an observation than anything else. I still think speeding, angry lane changers are more of a menace than lane hoggers. I don’t actually lane hog btw.

Well you aren't middle lane hogging if you're overtaking all those cars doing a lesser speed than you are you? And yes people who hog the middle lane are driving slower than the left lane...thats literally what lane hogging is

YANBU OP. It's irritating and I hate being forced in to the right hand lane. I'm surprised by the amount of people thinking doing something illegal is ok

Report him to the police the LTB

First post nails it.

He’s a twat.

There are times when all lanes are busy (I'm thinking M25) not an issue as it's not like you can go anywhere but dear god when it's clear move over and let other people past. I find people who pootle along at 60 in the outside lane really frustrating too as they push people to move over and undertake. There are no fast or slow lanes either so people need to get that out of their heads too.

The issue is that motorway driving lessons weren't compulsory when many drivers took their tests. After I passed I had a motorway lesson, best thing I could have done (he took me on the M4, M25 including the 6 lane bit, M3 and M40).

And yes people who hog the middle lane are driving slower than the left lane...thats literally what lane hogging is

Er no it isn’t.

The “practical alternative” would be driving within the law and how the Highway Code says you should?

In my mind MLH is when you are not overtaking, or travelling at faster speed than the traffic to your left and there is space to safely/easily move left

Yes, this is what it is. Driving in the middle lane for a protracted period if you are overtaking traffic in the left lane and keeping up with the flow of traffic in the middle lane is ok, as long as you do move over when the traffic thins and you can do so. Middle lane hogging is sitting in the middle lane when you could move to the left and causing vehicles to have to move into other lanes to pass you - or even worse, allowing cars in the left lane to undertake you.

It doesn't excuse his driving, but certain states allow driving in the middle lane. Maybe he was in auto pilot?

“Limits his options”…. He knows he’s allowed to look ahead and plan right??? Hopefully he’ll get pulled over by police at some point!!

'doesn’t like being on the inside lane as it limits his options'

Um - driving on the motorway isn't about what he likes or dislikes. It's about what is legal and safe.

This would piss me off too, but he's obviously defensive and not going to change.

I'd just take over the driving if it were me.

I do wonder if this (and the issue more generally) is a bit motorway-specific, though. I used to do a lot of driving on the M25 and (outside of busy times when everyone was crawling at about 40mph 🙃) it was very common for the inside lane to be full of people driving at 50mph max when the others were closer to 70mph. In that situation (and with so many turn-offs) are certain points, you find you can't stay in the inside lane if you want to go anywhere near 70mph.

It's not really "middle lane hogging" as everyone else was flowing freely and swapping lanes amongst the remaining lanes - just ignoring the one going much slower than the general speed of traffic!

However, when I started driving on the M40 and other roads that were comparatively quieter than the M25 I was pleasantly surprised that people did seem to be going at around 70mph in all lanes, so you could keep in. I wonder if it's a bit to do with volume of traffic/nature of the journeys?

Safer for who?

For the hogger?
At the expense of everyone else's safety!!!
Your safety limits everyone else's options.

The entitlement is off the scale .

You're right OP, OP. However, if it is an issue, then you drive. Simple.

There does come a point when you need to realise that advice can be ignored or seen as criticism, and they will never take it on board. Continuing to mention it and expecting different results, i.e., all of a sudden expecting him to agree with you, is a waste of energy, leaving you with one other option: You drive.

I was a passenger in a car that got pulled over on the M62.

the driver obviously knew better than me when suggested that she moved into lane one…

I’m not angry, I’m surprised.

Well it's sitting in the middle lane unnecessarily which includes driving slower than the left lane

And its still illegal.