Am I being horrible for even considering this?

[laylay98]

This isn’t a first world problem at all but just wanted some advice. I currently have a 2 year old DS and have another on the way who will be around 8 months when DS turns 3. I wanted to take him to Disneyland Paris for his 3rd birthday during my maternity leave not just because it is cheaper but because it would be nice to experience it on a quiet day. I will be returning to work to a term time job so won’t have this chance again anytime soon. AIBU to consider not taking the new baby with us. The only reason would be so we can enjoy the rides with DS and not have to carry new baby in the queues (can’t take a pram in the lines, they have to be left out) I’m worried about the guilt I would feel. Or could I manage with a 8 month old with us?

Why would you not manage an 8 month old as well? I can’t imagine considering leaving a baby behind.

Honestly I would wait until they are both old enough to enjoy it. Perhaps when they are 3 and 5 or older

I think it’s very weird of you. Of course you’ll manage perfectly well with your baby with you too! 8 mos are very portable.

BUT I agree with PP your DS sounds young for this anyway. I’d take them at 3 and 5 together or 4 and 6.

Surely you take turns on the rides with DS and the other one waits with the baby? I wouldn’t leave a small baby behind.

Excellent idea. No need to feel guilt. A baby won’t benefit from the trip. Zero chance of his remembering it.

TBH 3 year old won’t remember much in years to come either but will enjoy it at the time.

You can do the trip again with both children in a few years time.

It totally depends on the kind of baby you have to be honest. Some babies are totally happy in a pushchair with plenty to see and others want to be out rolling around on the floor/ sleep in the dark etc. Two of my children would have been perfectly happy but it wouldn’t have suited my youngest at all and it would have impacted on the trip.
I would go when they’re a bit older and can both enjoy it tbh

I think you might feel differently once baby arrives but i don't think it would necessarily be wrong. Do you have a partner coming with you? Who would look after the baby at home?

Don’t see an issue with it personally and I think it will be nice for you to have that 1-1 time with the oldest. But from experience you will 100% need a pram for someone that age. It’s alot of walking and the days are long

I'm surprised you're getting such negative response. An 8 month old won't get anything out of Disneyland and your ds will appreciate some quality one one time. do you have a partner you would be leaving the baby with?

Who are you leaving the baby with? I would only do this is leaving my baby with DH as our babies were formula fed and DH was as active parent as me.

your three year old won’t remember or get anything out of this trip. i would wait even if not ideal

What are you planning do for the babies 3rd birthday?

Because if it isn't a solo trip to Disneyland Paris I don’t see why your 2yo needs it without the baby?

Why not take a sling? Stand in queues together and one of you take the baby and another does the ride. Unless of course it’s one your baby can ride in which case go all together.

Or as previous posters suggested wait until they are both old enough to go?

In theory you could leave the baby. But until it's here you won't know this for sure. You may not want to, or the baby might not be in a position to be left.

Also, I think three is a bit young. DS went shortly before his 5th birthday and he does remember bits, but not all that much. I am sure your DS will enjoy it but possibly a bit to early to really remember. I would leave for a few years and take them both when the youngest is 4/5 and it's a lovely sibling memory.

Edited to say we were recommended to take a buggy even though DS was nearly 5, and I am so glad we did. It's a long day for them, and if you are wanting to see the fireworks as well then it will be a long evening for you if you are having to carry a tired toddler. DS slept soundly through the fireworks, but we enjoyed them.

I think 3 is a bit young too tbh, and I’d wait til they were both old enough.

However if you are still keen I’d just take the baby . I don’t think the fun in Disney would make up for my guilt 🤣

Spot on. My thoughts exactly

The baby would be easier and have a more enjoyable time (being carried, fresh air, nice things to look at) at Disney than a 3 year old. It’s not awful to leave them behind but I couldn’t have done it personally, it depends on what you can manage. 3 year old will hate queueing and need a buggy at Disney anyway though.

Never understood attitudes like this, my DD was 3 when we first went to Disneyland and she absolutely loved it. Her excitement and happiness was off the scale. Yes she maybe doesn't remember everything but she totally loved it & could go on a lot more rides than I imagined!

I think on one hand if you chose to go it would be good for your 3 year old to spend quality time with you, but like pp said make sure you take a buggy, don't underestimate how much you'll need it.

Are you going with a partner? I think that would determine my answer really as if there's two of you I don't see why you couldn't take turns of going on rides and taking the baby.