I am diagnosed autistic. DH is diagnosed ADHD. DS16 is pretty high support needs autistic, and I am currently trying to get both DD9 and DD13 diagnosed with autism/possibly ADHD. DD13 went through absolute hell starting senior school; getting little to no support from anyone, getting bullied, and other things that I believe no child should have to go through. She had been masking so much her whole life, and everything just crumbled. Things have slightly calmed now she’s in year 8, but she still struggles quite a bit with talking to peers etc. My friend’s DDalso13 has a similar level of support needs to mine (yes, I am aware my daughter hasn’t been diagnosed, but I truly believe she is, her peers believe she is, the SENCO is following the policy and believes she is autistic, you get my drift.) managed to get diagnosed aged 8, and received support entering senior school, and it has been much smoother for her. Many members of my family and DH’s family disapprove of our diagnoses, and don’t believe we should be chasing diagnoses for two of our daughters, who are obviously struggling, and a diagnosis would allow them to access support. DD13 has managed to get some support, however her school has limited resources. AIBU for telling a roomful of family members that it doesn’t affect them whether I ‘label’ my kids or not? They’re painting it out that I’m ruining my own children’s life my trying to get them a diagnosis that will allow them to access support! I know mental and physical health are different, but you would never tell anyone that who was sick not to go to a doctor and attempt to access support? I’m just very overwhelmed right now. and I’m wondering whether they are right. There’s no going back now; the SENCO at their respective schools is following the SEND policy and will hopefully give us a GP referral or whatever we need.