I am being over sensitive re my partners attitude?

[Boppy88]

I (40f) and my wife (35f) have been married for 10yrs. We have a 5 month old baby boy. My wife has always had a bit of a short fuse and mostly gets annoyed at herself, ie if she drops something, cant get something to work etc, she will be like f sake, c etc and this will go on for a few minutes before she is then in a bad mood/quiet for a while. Now baby is getting bigger I dont want him witnessing this kind of behaviour or hearing he swearing. She wont swear at him as such but she will say f*ing hell etc if shes stressed when feeding him or getting him dressed etc (he hates getting trousers on). Shes also more snappy with me, Im quite anxious and if I ask a question that I should maybe know the answer to or if it makes her feel Im getting on at her she will swear then be grumpy and quiet with me for a good while. Ive tried bringing up how I dont like this in front of my son however she says its normal to show emotion and he has to learn this. Am I being oversensitive? This isnt an all the time thing, maybe once every day or every couple of days so not too bad but it does bother me. I love her but sometimes I feel like Im just a big pain in her ass 😅🙈

Swearing whilst feeding a baby or getting them dressed is not okay, it’s bordering on emotional abuse. No young child should be made to feel they are the cause of a parents unhappiness/moodiness/swearing over their basic needs being taken care of. If she’s doing this when he’s this young, she will be doing it when he’s 2/3/4/5 etc so, whilst he’s too young now to know, he will soon be picking up on her moods.

It’s not normal to get so frustrated and irrationally angry over such tiny things. It’s certainly not something a small child should be exposed to, learned behaviour is very much a thing so it’s something they will also learn to copy, although you knew she was like this before you had a child! You can’t have presumed the additional stress of sleepless nights, and all the exhaustion that having a young family entails, would have miraculously changed her behaviour?

Maybe suggest she speaks to someone about ways to deal with her stress.

www.betterhelp.com/advice/anger/controlling-irrational-anger/

Emotional abuse to swear while dressing a baby??
Only on mumsnet!

So when that baby grows and is 1 year old, 18 months old, 3 years old and constantly hearing DM ranting and swearing and being stressy and frustrated whilst getting them dressed, you seriously don’t think that is going to negatively affect them and their self esteem at all? @missmollygreen
I can tell you now, having experience with foster children, it absolutely does.

Maybe having the baby will make your partner grow up a bit and learn to chill out. She sounds a bit of a drip, swearing over putting her shoes on or whatever.

I agree totally with @TheresAGlitchInAParallelUniverse- I have EUPD and have clearly made some HUGE mistakes in my parenting. We had a call from social services just yesterday as 6yr old cannot regulate his emotions. The referral was made by school.
Id really urge you @Boppy88to get some help for your wife now, before you need help for your son x