To take my 9yo out of school til they actually do something??

[MumOfManyMoods85]

ok not sure if this belongs here or not tbh but just need advice

so my 9yo (yr5) has adhd diagnosis and probs asd too but still waiting on full assessment and school are being USELESS. been chasing help for over a year now and they keep saying they’re doing everything they can but he’s still getting sent out of class nearly every day. teacher told me yesterday he was “disrupting learning” cos he wouldn’t sit still after PE and was humming (???) he’s NINE ffs

they won’t put in for EHCP cos they say “his needs don’t meet threshold” even tho he’s had 3 exclusions and TA support keeps changing. i’ve asked for meetings, done the SENCO chat, emailed everyone and nothing changes. he’s bright but school just see him as naughty and i’m honestly done

this week he cried and begged not to go in and i feel like the worst mum sending him. so i’m thinking of just taking him out til someone actually listens or we get the support. not full on deregister (yet) just keeping him off a bit til i can sort it.

aibu? i don’t want to make things worse but no one is bloody helping and he’s falling apart

pls be kind i’m knackered and just want my kid to be ok

Firstly, you don’t need school to apply for an EHCP.

Google “IPSEA applying for an EHC assessment” and read read read.

Download Copilot and do the same.

Get your application in with all your supporting evidence, and start from there.

If your child can’t attend because they’re not meeting his needs, don’t don’t don’t off roll him. Just keep him off and do what you need to do. Low attendance (and exclusion) are both evidence that the school isn’t meeting his needs.

But you need to bone up A LOT about how this world works.

As for “won’t meet the threshold” your Senco needs a bloody good telling.

The “threshold” to have a full EHC assessment is set out in the Children and Families Act of 2014 and says that the LA must assess them if the child “has or may have a special educational need which may require provision in the form of an education health and care plan.” That’s it. School are fobbing you off.

I’m an ASD parent to a child in Year 5 and 100% agree with what @Fusedspursaid. Keep him off but do not off roll him! Don’t send the “I’ll be responsible for his education now” letter. The school will be keen to keep their unattendance level down and him being off shows that the school aren’t meeting his needs. Good luck

Agree with all of the above - record his absence with school as mental health/anxiety related so that it is not marked as unauthorised.

Make the application yourself as @Fusedspur said.

You don’t have to have a diagnosis, just evidence of need, which you have.

Do you have evidence of emails, meetings, conversations with the school? They are all evidence too.

thank u all so much. i didn’t know i could apply myself tbh i thought it had to come from school 😩 feel like i’ve wasted time waiting for them to “decide” if he needs help. will look up ipsea later when baby naps

he’s def struggling with anxiety now so that makes sense re absence. was gonna say illness but i’ll put mental health if that’s better. he cried all morning today so i just gave up tbh

i’ll try not to off roll but honestly feels like i’m at the end of my rope. thanks again it means a lot x

Absolutely don’t de-register him from school. As soon as you do that, you will
make it so much harder to get an EHCP. Also, if you say that you are home educating, the LA has no requirement to provide any kind of education for him.

Agree. And they can’t off roll him themselves either although this may in fact be their current covert strategy.

Well said!

Do a parental application for an EHCP. The fact he has a diagnosis of ADHD is enough for the Local Authority to do an assessment as to whether they agree he needs one.

Keeping him off is tricky because they can potentially fine you. They may well mark absences as unauthorised and the school can make life very difficult for you if they're not sympathetic. The Senco has already shown themselves to be lacking in not doing an EHCP application already.

If he is off put the reason as unmet special educational needs. Make it clear he's off because the school isn't/can't meet his needs.

Agree with the above. School are being ridiculous. IPSEA is your friend! Everything you need is in that website and you can book a free advice line call.

As much as I hate to say it, the only way to get any action at my DD's school has been to keep her home. They are so concerned about attendance figures, it's you're only bargaining chip.

Following as having almost the same issues with dn right now