Best responses please

[Abhorrentpeople]

I've just come home to find this on my doormat.

Give me your best responses please, particularly knowing that

1. she never parks her car on her own drive, she parks across it

2. my car normally lives on my drive, but I moved it Saturday to put DDs uni stuff back in the garage on Sunday

3. there's a LOT of other on road parking, including next to my fence a massive 5 strides from her gate

The irony is my first job when I got home tonight was going to be to move my car. I'm not sure I will now.

So, your best responses please

It's not petty at all. It's not giving in to rude demands.

How dare she leave you a note telling you what to do? She has no right and couldn't even be bothered to ask nicely.

I like the idea of writing 'NO' and posting it through her door, but I'd probably just ignore.

If she wants to speak to me about it, she could; and I'd do my puzzled expression and ask why her visitors couldn't park on her drive, since she doesn't.

Hell would freeze over (or I'd be driving off anyway) before I'd move my car.

Was going to say... isn't this the sign of a psychopath or something?! Why would you mix cases with such gay abandon?!

And no dots on the lower-case i... that probably means she leaves her handbrake off

Please do this 🤣

"Who are you?"

I definitely think it's the sign of a psychopath. She has no morals and never shares a humorous gif.

😆 🤣

Draw a smiley face emoji on it post through letter box

There is nothing worse that one of them

It’s that line at the bottom that would piss me off the most.

If you write one back be sure to include a sarcastic underline.

Best response. 😂

Your fence told me it was lonely.

Or…Thanks for the tip. I didn’t know the street had a designated visitor space. I’ll pass the word on to my friends and the other neighbours x

If this happened to me I would just ignore it. My car is on a road, where it’s entitled to be. I’ll move it when I’m ready..

I'd draw a laughing crying emoji and just post that back

Agreed. Completely ignore the note and retain the moral high ground. Bonus points if you can avoid taking your car anywhere for a week.

What a cheeky mare. Either ignore it or write 'it will move when I next go out' and put through her box.

Great responses here, but having had a nightmare time with neighbours, I think it’s best to keep the peace as far as you can.
I’d leave the car, but if confronted would kill her with kindness, surprise and innocence.
I so enjoy doing this, it brings out my best acting skills even if I’m seething inside.

Definitely the winner here 🤣

I've reported your replies to DD-outside, next to next doors open window.

I've been dramatic in the road pretending to measure the driveway.

I've contemplated parking across my drive, leaving a space the size of a smart car for her visitors.

But frustratingly, I wanted my car back on my drive more than I wanted to be neutral. So it's moved.

There was a reason it was going to be my first job when I got home.

Thanks for all your responses. They've given me much humour.

Just ignore! Your neighbour will never know if you read and ignored, or never saw it (it could have blow away or someone else removed it). Then, continue to park there, but only occasionally when it suits you - again, your neighbour will never know if you're ignoring her request or you're unaware of it.

Post a helpful diagram through her door to demonstrate how own her car can be parked on her drive, thus providing more parking spaces on the road for her beloved visitors.

She thinks she can boss you around now. You shouldn’t have moved it. You’ve lost the game.