AIBU to find baby sensory groups excruciating

[User88181992]

I’m not sure if it’s just me or whether most other mums feel the same way and are just hiding it well. I come away from most sessions feeling totally deflated. It’s not so much baby groups as a whole, as I’ve found the library baby rhyme time much more natural. There’s something about baby sensory…possibly how structured it is and the scheduled in moments to chat among ourselves? Waving a multitude of different coloured rattles at a blank face?
I signed up for a whole term to alleviate guilt about not doing enough on mat leave, and I thought my baby would serve as a good prop if I am totally honest. Instead it feels like the first day at school every week :(
Does anyone else find these sessions painful? Did anyone manage to make..Mum Friends?

I actually really enjoyed baby sensory while I was on mat leave. I liked the structure that you aren’t just sat around awkwardly chatting (that can happen at play group) and you could just be with your baby and or chat to others if you wanted. But sounds like you’re not keen so I’d just see the term out (that you paid for) then don’t go back. Now my baby is older, I prefer toddler group

100% this! Hahaha I needed to meet more mums like this when mine were young 😂 Just find what works for you, that way you’re more likely to make friends. Agree it’s easier at school

Wasn't a thing when mine were babies what's the point. Just something made up to make money.

I never went to them. I didn't mind playgroups for parents and toddlers where you stay and have a cup of tea and a piece of toast, chat to the other mums if you want or keep to yourself and watch your kid play. Babies in arms don't need to go to structured groups. If people enjoy them, great. If you don't, just don't go.

Worst nightmare. But @babasaclover put it so much better.

YANBU but I really enjoy it and thought I'd find it cringe tbh. I think baby sensory is a brand, from what I've read on here though? I do Hartbeeps and mum/baby yoga since mine can't handle me going to adult yoga on my own.

I find the baby group really fun, my baby seems to enjoy it and it's a great way for me to chat to and meet other mums and have some routine.

I didn't bother. My friend showed some videos of when her ds went , he was a few months older than mine. What a load of wank!
Snobby mums performance parenting over exaggerated expressions to the music / instruments.

We did 2 differnt church ones , not religious but more down to earth everyone friendly not snobby. All the dcs loved it.

All baby groups are for the parents. Some people really like things like baby sensory or baby massage, others prefer singing groups, signing groups or traditional toddler groups. Some prefer no groups at all.

When I had my eldest child my sister died when I was 20 weeks pregnant and I moved house to a brand new area at 36 weeks pregnant. I did all the groups I could when she was born to keep routine, make friends and try and stop feeling lonely and grieving alone in my house. I didn’t do sensory but would have done if there was a local class.

So many parents do a range of groups to have a routine, to meet people and to try and preserve their mental health as we know that postpartum is a tricky time mentally for many.

If it’s not for you then great, but others may choose to do it.

I

I went with my eldest for a trial session. Didn’t get it. Didn’t go back.

With my youngest a friend had started going and enjoyed it so suggested we meet for lunch first and then went. I went solely because I fancied a lunch out and a chat with my nice friend. First couple of sessions again I didn’t get it. (But very much enjoyed my lunch with my friend.) By session 3 it suddenly became more enjoyable. Ds seemed to recognise the songs and smiled a lot, I had learnt the actions so felt less of an idiot and I got chatting to all the other women there who were really nice too.

It helped that the leader was good and had been a speech therapist in a previous life and so was able to explain why we were doing what we were doing. She also had a way of speaking us as though we were “interested childcare professionals” rather than “total idiots” which seemed to be how most people spoke to the parents of small children so I appreciated that.

I liked it so much that I carried on going when my friend went back to work! (Although I did very much miss our lunches.)

I loved Hartbeeps but only when my baby was much older and could interact. I didn't really do many groups before six months old unless they were for my benefit. They always seemed to be on when mine was asleep. I did enjoy Mum and baby yoga/pilates however

I liked baby sensory. Nice props and setups (stuff like the giant parachutes) and dds laughed and gazed at me waving things in their faces rather than having a blank look. My favourite classes though were Hartbeeps and Gymboree. Lots of energy, use of music, imaginative props and selfie ops. I didn't like church hall type playgroups with cheap tea and biscuits in a cold room with broken and unmatched toys.

I went to Baby Sensory religiously with DC1….on our last class I went to thank the teacher and she could not remember neither my name nor DC1’s name. It ended things on such a sour note and made me realise it’s just a corporate company like most other things!

Just do what you want to. It won't make any difference to baby. Yes the song is a bit culty but for some people it's just nice to get out the house and have an activity.

I was not looked kindly upon when I took DS. The only sense he was interested in was sticking every single thing in his gob.

Gave it a very wide berth with the 2nd child...free library story time & a group at local church where it didn't matter what time you arrived AND they had decent biscuits worked out far better!

Are you having a.larf?
Baby Sensory Group sounds like something out of Science Fiction. Margaret Attwood should write a book on it.

Or is this latest Virtue Signalling Activity for the Woke trailblazers..Like the M21 ers.

Just go to baby group where the mothers are friendly and where the babies can do norma, real things,.

You lnow, like vomitting all over their bibs and laughing at the same time. Followed by the second act of pissing and shitting and filling their nappies big times.

Then throwing toys and stuff all over the place and at other babies for fun for the final sct.

You will both love it.

Enjoy.

🤞🌻😻

X

My DD hated it.
There were all these zen, yummy mummies in yoga pants and then there was me, so not yummy mummy, in jeans and scuffed trainers
DD screamed throughout and I got tuts and looks from the yummies.
I lasted ten minutes then excused us, and one of them said "oh thank goodness". So rude.
It was ridiculous all that flapping your hands about and shite.
Never went back and didn't even try it with DS.

Oh god I hate this song!! 😅
OP I’m currently going with my DS and I said the exact same thing to my partner!! Thankfully no more now nursery starts very soon ❤️

When DS was born, I saw these baby classes as just another business idea built off the guilt of parents, who are told they're neglectful if they don't do sensory or music classes.

I felt the same about baby swim when I took DS. They just wave them around in the pool & sing songs. I didn't put DD in until 18 months & she's 9 now & streaks ahead of where DS was at the same age.

I took mine to a free council playgroup, library story / music time & different parks. They'd freely interact & play without constant direction & rules and I was happy to not be standing around listening to the super young mums pick on me for my age (mid 30's!).

Ahhhh I love them! But if you hate them, dont go obviously! There's no reason to - your baby can get these experiences just by being outside or in museums etc.

Do what you enjoy. I only do it because it breaks up the day and because I can't be bothered doing that kind of thing at home haha

I found Bloom Baby groups much better. Very professional and babies love it

I didn’t enjoy baby sensory but there was a branch of classes by me called Bloom and they were fantastic. We went for the full year on maternity leave and the lovely woman that ran our class still keeps in touch now.

I hated it. The leader was so unfriendly and didn't even come out the room to greet me / tell me where to go on my first session. I sat in the waiting room so was then late for class after trying 5 different doors to find her. It was so structured but in an awkward way and every time she finished a song she would awkwardly and silently come around and prise the shaker etc out of the babies' hands when she only gave them it minutes ago. None of the mums spoke and I found the forcing everyone into the free play room next door for a play and chat so forced because no one spoke. I really didn't want to go again as it made me feel really anxious and my baby didn't crack a smile once and was actually moaning when usually she loves classes. I felt I had to go though because there wasn't an option to pay for a trial class and I had paid £40! My baby ended up ill the next week and she refused to refund or transfer the booking to another date so it was just that's that class / money lost. I didn't go back and just forfeited the money because I didn't want to deal with her again and the thought of going made me anxious and on edge. We've found another less known franchise where the leader is so welcoming and the classes are actually fun for adults as well and I've even made a friend!

MN answer a) is that they are an appalling waste of money and unnecessary (god forbid anyone does something that isn’t strictly necessary!) and why don’t you go to a church hall.

Answer b) is no one spoke to me, everyone was so unfriendly, it was cliquey. Why don’t you go to a church hall or go for a walk?

My answer is - I loved it but if you didn’t, don’t go. It’s really not a big deal; we all like what we like. I didn’t get on with church halls at all, but I don’t feel the need to start threads about them

I enjoyed Baby College and I didn’t know a soul.

Top tip - unless you’ve been unfortunate enough to chance onto a class with a whole NCT group taking it, no one else in the room knows anyone very well either.

I made friends by turning to people at the end and asking if they would like to grab a coffee. Even in an extremely snobbish and mega wealthy part of the Home Counties, people
didn’t say no and I met some nice people.

Sometimes you’ve just got to go put yourself out there. I’m not an extrovert and not naturally outgoing so it’s not like I had bags of confidence, just a hunch that no one else knew anyone other.

Agree with you OP. I'm sure some are fun but had a trial at one class (won't name it) and it was so bad it was actually funny. Yoga poses with baby that involved lifting their legs up and down for 30 seconds. Whispering letters in their ear so they can sense them (???) Going on a jog around the room holding said baby whilst listening to nauseating high pitched music. The other mums looked as awkward and embarrassed as I did. Never went back.