I’m really hurt…..

[Ginger22]

My partner came home from the office tonight and we settled down with a glass for a chat. He started recounting a story today from the office…… part way through he said “because she’s really attractive”….. talking about sone kind of hassle a young lady was receiving at the moment in his office. I said “what?” And he said “well, can’t there be other attractive women in the world?” I said, it sounds like you find her attractive? He said well, she’s half my age! That made me feel worse.

I felt really hurt. I’m 47, menopausal and now I feel like there’s a young, attractive woman in his office that they’re all gawping at. When I explained how this made me feel, he said I was not being genuine and I was ridiculous to feel upset. Am I?

I know. There have been many moments where I have thought if I had the means I’d rather be alone. I have 2 children and 2 step children and we own a house. I’ve been through a hellish divorce and I know enough to know there really isn’t a lot of support. I dont have any family support. I am where I am and I just need to make the best of it. Life’s ok in general, just tonight set me off. Thank you all for your replies x

I'd say we'll if she made you the happiest you've ever been, where did it all go wrong?

I think he is guilty of being a classic idiot man with tactless phrasing. I thought mine had some history with a female friend when I met her the first time, I asked him and he said "nothing has ever happened because the timing has never been right". Needless to say there were many conversations had after that before we continued to where we are now. I do think though that yours is saying that he isn't attracted to her because she is half his age though, not that she wouldn't be into him. Honestly, I can't find anyhing more grim than wanting to bed a 20 year old, so I'd imagine the reverse is the same for hopefully some men.

Your update makes the world of difference. He has a habit of making you feel like you aren’t enough. This isn’t an issue with you, it’s an issue with him being a knob.

I think what he said to you about his ex wife is probably why you have taken this comment about the woman at work so badly. And that's not your fault, he's made you feel worthless and second best so it's really no wonder you feel this way.

He sounds awful.
Detach emotionally from him.
He's a twat.
You are too good for him.
No need to leave, suit yourself, but realise he is a real twat.