to ask you if sexual chemistry means a lot to you?

[Idiotoverhere]

I have another thread on here which is far more serious however I just want to know what your viewpoints on this are

Does this; to you show if a relationship is successful or can you go without this for other factors?

I’ve just come out of a terrible relationship in lots of ways but the sexual chemistry was like nothing else I’ve ever experienced and I’m wondering why this was if the relationship wasn’t right for me

I don’t know anything about your other thread but for me sexual chemistry is very important. We have four children, busy working lives and need that excitement to maintain the spark between us.

Yes it’s important. And can sometimes mask a lot of other problems and make you feel closer to your partner than you actually are. It has to work inside and outside of the bedroom (or whichever location you’re ripping each other clothes off in).

It's very important but not enough to sustain a relationship on it's own.

If anything, it means that some relationships last longer than they should because the sex is so good.

Sexual chemistry is important but it isn't the ONLY thing that's important. A relationship that has great sexual chemistry but is bad in other ways isn't going to work.

the sexual chemistry was like nothing else I’ve ever experienced and I’m wondering why this was if the relationship wasn’t right for me

I think that if you have to ask this question, you have a romantic misunderstanding of what sexual chemistry is, really. The sexual chemistry was good because you found each other physically attractive and liked the same things in bed - that's literally all it is. It has nothing to do with emotional compatibility or kindness or loyalty/integrity or shared values or any of the other things that make a relationship healthy and successful.

I had incredible sexual chemistry with a man who, in retrospect, I didn't even like very much for most of the relationship. The only things we had in common were sexual compatibility and a similar sense of humour.

Because the sex was unbelievably good, for both of us, we went on seeing each other for far longer than we should have done. He openly admitted that he'd thought about ending the relationship many times but each time he thought 'But this is the best sex I've ever had in my life - what if I never have sex as good as this again?' and so chickened out of the doing the right thing and ending it. But the relationship was incredibly unhealthy and we brought out the absolute worst in each other everywhere except the bedroom.

It sounds like a trauma bond op. The sex is so good because the relationship is so bad basically. In situations like this, the person who treats you bad is also the only one you long for for comfort.
The intermittent reinforcement of highs and lows, means that you get a higher than normal dopamine rush than you would in a healthy relationship, in those moments with this person when you feel connected to them, ie when having sex.

We don't need that spark to maintain our relationship. Neither of us can be arsed any more, but we love each other through and through.

Surely it’s impossible to get into a relationship without some level of sexual chemistry?! Why would you bother….unless you are genuinely settling.

I think it’s less important because you can have a healthy long relationship without it so other factors must be more important